CDZ Cyberbullying . . .

[NewsVine_Mariyam]

What do you think about cyberbullying? I'm not talking about being in a heated argument or discussion and doing a little namecalling out of frustration or whatnot. I am talking about out and out trolling.

"Adult Bullying: Perpetrators and Victims" by Peter Randall is informative.

 

[NewsVine_Mariyam]

I don't agree with just letting them be. I think they should be confronted, although just about EVERY SINGLE article I've read on the matter says the opposite. Just ignore them and keep silent, they say. That is news to me though, as I was always taught to stand up to bullies and to stand up for the underdog or the person being bullied and ganged up on.

This is a reason why this type of behavior should never be tolerated. It escalates from bullying and badgering, to harassment, stalking and too frequently, murder:
Ex-wife of man who killed 6 in Arizona relieved he's dead

 

[Luddly Neddite]

I've seen it. I've talked about the jerks who stalked me and tried very hard to bully me. They failed.

Actually, some time back, there was a cyber bully right here in this forum. He/she/it went after a poster who said they were young and gay. Shameful.

We've also seen a lot of cyber bullying of all LGBTQ. I don't mean just here buy by politicians, churches. Very shameful.

Also shameful that Melania is pretending to be against it. A lot like she's pretending to be against drugs and actually had the nerve to stand up next to Gold Star Families. OTOH, its possible she has no idea that her husband has attacked vets, POWs, handicapped and often on line.

Cyber or not, the weak and ignorant will always try to bully. I doubt that can ever be stopped. Maybe we can teach normal people to be stronger?

I agree with all you said except Melania. I don't see her as being a bully to anyone. She seems to be very nice genuinely.

That was partly sarcasm.

Its just that her husband is vicious and vile. His voice and actions do a lot more damage than any person says they are against bullying.

If you feel like you are getting "bullied" on the INTERNET, you have major problems. And its more than some butthead picking on you. ESPECIALLY if you are an adult.
Words are just words. Only YOU let them hurt you.
The internet is DIGITAL. Its not even spoken words!

Perhaps the victim has major problems but that's hardly an excuse. Adult or child - not everyone is prepared to deal with it.

And as we know ...

What do you think about cyberbullying? I'm not talking about being in a heated argument or discussion and doing a little namecalling out of frustration or whatnot. I am talking about out and out trolling.

I think it's fun.


.

Those who enjoy bullying are weak and frightened. They're small people who must knock down other people's chimney's so theirs is the tallest.

Yes, those who cannot deal with bullying do have a problem but the sick ones are the bullies.

 

[Toro]

I’m against it.

For example, there’s one poster on the Internet who posts somewhere else who is extremely vain, shallow and narcissistic. Whenever she gets bested in an argument, she starts calling others old, ugly and fat. She claims she’s thin and attractive, and posts pictures of herself that are obviously at least 20 years old based on the clothes she has on and the furniture in her house. She tells everyone that she is so beautiful and others are ugly and unattractive. Of course, she claims she never starts things, but she usually does.

This type of cyberbullying is what female bullies do to other females, and it’s all over social media.

Personally, I find this type of cyberbullying to be reprehensible.

 

[Luddly Neddite]

If you feel like you are getting "bullied" on the INTERNET, you have major problems. And its more than some butthead picking on you. ESPECIALLY if you are an adult.
Words are just words. Only YOU let them hurt you.
The internet is DIGITAL. Its not even spoken words!

Talking about the psyche of the bully. Yes, adults can bully other adults online. Happens all the time.

If you feel "bullied" that is your own problem. This is the INTERNET.

Think about that.

Why is "this is the INTERNET" an acceptable excuse?

Is it because the bully can hide behind anonymity and will never have to face the consequences of their actions and words?

How does that make it okay?

 

[Luddly Neddite]

Melania is dealing with liberal bullies all the time.

I've seen it. I've talked about the jerks who stalked me and tried very hard to bully me. They failed.

Actually, some time back, there was a cyber bully right here in this forum. He/she/it went after a poster who said they were young and gay. Shameful.

We've also seen a lot of cyber bullying of all LGBTQ. I don't mean just here buy by politicians, churches. Very shameful.

Also shameful that Melania is pretending to be against it. A lot like she's pretending to be against drugs and actually had the nerve to stand up next to Gold Star Families. OTOH, its possible she has no idea that her husband has attacked vets, POWs, handicapped and often on line.

Cyber or not, the weak and ignorant will always try to bully. I doubt that can ever be stopped. Maybe we can teach normal people to be stronger?

I disagree with you that cyber-bullying is funny.

It may be funny to the bully but not to the one being bullied.

 

[ricechickie]

I’m against it.

For example, there’s one poster on the Internet who posts somewhere else who is extremely vain, shallow and narcissistic. Whenever she gets bested in an argument, she starts calling others old, ugly and fat. She claims she’s thin and attractive, and posts pictures of herself that are obviously at least 20 years old based on the clothes she has on and the furniture in her house. She tells everyone that she is so beautiful and others are ugly and unattractive. Of course, she claims she never starts things, but she usually does.

This type of cyberbullying is what female bullies do to other females, and it’s all over social media.

Personally, I find this type of cyberbullying to be reprehensible.

On the other hand, there is a certain section of this site that accepts and encourages verbal sparring of the kind that might include insults consistent with bullying. Since the purpose of this section is so well advertised, it should come as no surprise that someone posting there might be subjected to bullying.

 

[Mac1958]

If you feel like you are getting "bullied" on the INTERNET, you have major problems. And its more than some butthead picking on you. ESPECIALLY if you are an adult.
Words are just words. Only YOU let them hurt you.
The internet is DIGITAL. Its not even spoken words!

Talking about the psyche of the bully. Yes, adults can bully other adults online. Happens all the time.

If you feel "bullied" that is your own problem. This is the INTERNET.

We are talking about the psyche of the bully. Why do they feel the need to bully other people, especially those they might consider weaker than them?

IMO? Deep down insecurity. Unhappiness.
Probably a lot of factors that lead people to try and make others miserable.

And there it is.
..

 

[Billo_Really]

Well, I'm more speaking of the psyche of the bullier. Perhaps I should have been more clear in my OP. What do you think causes people to just go around bullying whomever for whatever reason? Why do you think they are so happy and thrilled to try to make another person feel terrible?

Maybe because that's all they know. Maybe they grew up with abusive parents, got into abusive relationships and communicate with others in an abusive manner, because it is familiar to them. And they find comfort in familiarity.

It's like a woman who had an abusive father, gets married to an abusive husband. One reason may be that is what is familiar to them? Trying something new scares them. They fear the unknown.

I dunno, that's my take on it.

 

[Dogmaphobe]

There is cyber bullying when people's identities are known, or when the bully has some power over the target.

There are only a hand full who are even capably of bullying, here ,because our identities are unknown and only a few have power over others. Of these, most are not bullies.

 

[Mac1958]

There is cyber bullying when people's identities are known, or when the bully has some power over the target.
There are only a hand full who are even capably of bullying, here ,because our identities are unknown and only a few have power over others. Of these, most are not bullies.

Yeah, I'd think online "bullying" is simply a different creature, because the classical definition would most likely have to include an element of physical domination or threat.

The motives are probably the same, though: A miserable person trying to make others as miserable as they are. There's a lot of that here (which I wouldn't have expected), it's certainly unpleasant to see, but online it's largely an impotent and empty gesture.

At least for adults. For kids, that's a different matter. The peer pressure it must add to their already difficult teen years must be profound for many.
.

 

[Mac1958]

Let’s actually define bullying:
If a person is trying to end the interactions, and they other party refuses, it’s probably bullying.
If neither side refuses to quit because it’s important to “win” something, then both sides have some culpability.

Bingo. You would think that, when asked to stop an interaction, an adult would certainly do so.
.

 

[ChrisL]

There is cyber bullying when people's identities are known, or when the bully has some power over the target.

There are only a hand full who are even capably of bullying, here ,because our identities are unknown and only a few have power over others. Of these, most are not bullies.

That is not true at all. I have seen people leave this forum over being bullied mercilessly every time they tried to post. So the point is here, should you let the bully win and just leave?

You also shouldn't be insinuating that it is not bullying because they can't physically harm you or because they don't know your real name. Sure, you can just leave or log off, but why should you?

 

[ChrisL]

Let’s actually define bullying:

If a person is trying to end the interactions, and they other party refuses, it’s probably bullying.

If neither side refuses to quit because it’s important to “win” something, then both sides have some culpability.

That is not bullying. Words have meanings. The "bully" says or does things purposefully to get a negative reaction because they think it is fun or entertaining, like what you do in the flamer zone in order to get the approval of your fellow bullies. You would qualify as a bully according to the definition.

 

[ChrisL]

I “bully” people because my momma didn’t love me enough, and daddy drank, and only the thickest-skinned kid got any dinner.....

Woe is me.

I believe that. Poor you. Should we have pity for bullies and feel sorry for them and tolerate them, or should we fight back against the bullies?

 

[TheParser]

As a relatively new member here, I have followed a policy that I learned the hard way at another website: NEVER, EVER reply to anyone who is rude. (I am delighted that you have an "ignore" function here. One can literally banish bullies from one's computer screen. Cool.)

I strongly believe that all the problems in this world are due to one reason: People (both the nobodies -- like me -- and the somebodies) do not know their place. It is not the place of another human being to "bully" anyone else.

Anyway, these Internet discussion forums are simply a way for us ordinary people to blow off steam.

In public, most of us go along with politically correct mantras or keep our mouths shut -- or else!

 

[ChrisL]

I don't agree with just letting them be. I think they should be confronted, although just about EVERY SINGLE article I've read on the matter says the opposite. Just ignore them and keep silent, they say. That is news to me though, as I was always taught to stand up to bullies and to stand up for the underdog or the person being bullied and ganged up on.

It's really frustrating to deal with people who are intent on insulting you for no good reason; it happens sometimes and it's usually a group of posters, like a good old fashioned shark feed.
You want to respond to defend, say for the record, that the insult is garbage, but that lets the troll win. So you lose either way. And I've had posts pulled down and even got a warning once for responding to a troll, not trolling myself.
So I guess the trolls are going to win. But if we ignore them long enough, they go away. The only people I've ever put on ignore were persistent trolls and after a few months I take them off and usually that's the end of it

There is a poster that I know who tried ignoring them, and it seemed as if they got even worse with her (I don't really want to mention her name here) for a time before it finally stopped. It took months and for other people to finally get sick of it and confront them before it stopped and it still hasn't stopped completely and this person never posts in the flame zone.

 

[ChrisL]

What we really oughtta do is bring back duels. Duels were respectable.

So, should we ignore bullies or should we fight back using the same tricks they try to use? I try to use their same rhetoric back on them when I am confronted by cyberbullies.

Depends on what you're talking about. Political debates?

No, mostly just online bullying in general or, if you want to be specific, there is the flame zone here. It's entire purpose is to flame, troll or bully other posters. Getting heated during an argument or discussion with someone else and losing your cool is normal. Bullying other posters in the flamer zone is NOT normal, especially when most of these people are well over 50 years old! It is to be expected from children. When adults do it, it is something else entirely. Like a mental illness.

 

[ChrisL]

Then there is the "other" group, where they are not really bullies but in order to try to make the bullies approve of them, they will join in or encourage the bullies. However, I am not really into drawing lines like that, so they should be considered bullies too, just for another purpose.

 

[ChrisL]

Let’s actually define bullying:
If a person is trying to end the interactions, and they other party refuses, it’s probably bullying.
If neither side refuses to quit because it’s important to “win” something, then both sides have some culpability.

Bingo. You would think that, when asked to stop an interaction, an adult would certainly do so.
.

Ask who to stop? If a person or group of people are bullying you, and you confront them and they ask you to stop, you should stop? You should probably think about your comment a little more deeply.