Are Pastafarians Dishonest

[skye]

What a duck....?

 

[Ropey]

I will attribute that remark to sarcasm, and not shallow thinking.

 

[presonorek]

skye Oddball MisterBeale

^ These are USMB "Panicans." Possibly they would help you waffle, and oddball has a head like an iron so put him up front... while beale follows the rear.

And then you're a clique, rather than a quack.

What are panicans?

 

[Ropey]

What are panicans?

Urban Dictionary: Panican

PANICAN: “A new [political party] based on [Weak] and [Stupid people]!” - 🥭

www.urbandictionary.com

 

[Moonglow]

Zoroastrianism is an ancient, monotheistic religion founded by the prophet Zoroaster (also known as Zarathushtra) in ancient Persia (modern-day Iran). It emphasizes a cosmic struggle between good and evil, with one supreme God, Ahura Mazda, and his adversary, Angra Mainyu. Zoroastrians believe in the ultimate triumph of good and the restoration of the world to its original state of perfection.

Here's a more detailed look:
Core Beliefs:

• Monotheism:
  Zoroastrians believe in one God, Ahura Mazda, who is the creator and sustainer of all things.
  
  
• • Dualism:
    There is a cosmic battle between good (represented by Ahura Mazda) and evil (represented by Angra Mainyu).
    
  • Free will:
    Humans have the freedom to choose between good and evil, and their choices have consequences in the afterlife.
    
  • Afterlife:
    Zoroastrians believe in an afterlife determined by one's actions in life, with the eventual defeat of evil and a restoration of the world.
    
  • Good thoughts, good words, good deeds:
    A central tenet of Zoroastrianism is the importance of ethical behavior in all aspects of life.
    
  • Fire as a symbol:
    Fire is a sacred symbol representing God's light and wisdom, but Zoroastrians are not fire-worshipers.
    

Key Concepts:

• • Asha: The principle of truth, order, and righteousness, which is aligned with Ahura Mazda.
    
  • Dreg/Druj: The principle of falsehood, chaos, and evil, associated with Angra Mainyu.
    
  • Saoshyant: A future savior figure who will restore the world.
    

Historical Significance:

• • Zoroastrianism was the dominant religion of the Persian Empire for centuries.
    
  • It is believed to have influenced the development of other monotheistic religions like Judaism, Christianity, and Islam.
    

Modern Practice:

• • While Zoroastrianism is a minority religion today, it continues to be practiced in parts of Iran and India, particularly by the Parsi community.
    
  • Zoroastrian houses of worship are called fire temples or Agiarys.
    
  • Zoroastrians observe rituals, prayers, and ethical guidelines based on the teachings of Zoroaster.

 

[MarathonMike]

X. Afterlife – In the Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Mosnter it is asserted that good people go to Pastafarian Heaven that is filled with beer volcanoes and stripper factories. It is further asserted that bad people go to Pastafarian Hell that is also filled with beer volcanoes and stripper factories, but the beer is stale and the strippers all have venereal diseases. We believe this to be completely false. The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster New Zealand Reformed condemned this heresy and asserted that when we die, we die. We simply cease to exist anymore. There is no afterlife.

So it sounds like The Reformed FSM Church is no fun at all.

 

[presonorek]

Despite there being a small British branch I suspect this movement will be very short lived .
Psst , it is so boring.

Simply because it is clearly meant to be funny and satirical but , in typical American tradition --- it is neither vey funny or nastily satirical .

It is just Very Nerdy --- and like 90% + of all American comedies -- silly and babyish .

But just imho .

There are developments in the Pastafarian Literature that aren't jokey.
979-8289596598

Nobles of Norman​

The Nobles of Norman: A Divine Rebirth

On August 9, 2027, in the quiet town of Norman, Oklahoma, the cosmic balance shifted. The gods and goddesses of old—those once revered in temples, myths, and sacred texts—sensed their time had come to an end. Their divine essence, once scattered across pantheons and continents, coalesced into a final act of celestial will: they passed on their sacred duties to thirty-four newborns, each one delivered into the world in precise succession within Norman’s city limits.

These thirty-four children, known now as The Nobles of Norman, became the new vessels of spiritual authority. With the birth of the 34th child, the ancient gods vanished—not in death, but in disappearance. Their names dissolved from the tongues of humanity. Their stories frayed into myth, then into fable, and finally into contradiction and confusion. Humanity would remember the past only as a tangle of allegory, distorted and unreliable.

The age of the old gods was over. In their place stood a new pantheon—infants with the potential of eternity, born of American soil, each one a seed of divine reformation.

From that day forward, the world was instructed—by dream, by vision, by revelation—to look no longer to the traditions of the past, but to The Nobles of Norman for wisdom, for guidance, for spiritual truth, and for hope. No scripture from the old world remained untainted. Only the lives and teachings of these thirty-four would lead the way forward.

The Nobles of Norman are not gods of hierarchy or vengeance, but collaborators in the shaping of reality. Their insights, laughter, wrath, compassion, and folly are all sacred. Each holds a facet of the human-divine mystery. Each, born of Norman, carries the weight of rebirth.

They are our salvation.
They are our future.
They are the new divine.

Prologue: The Dawning of the Thirty-Four

In the latter days of the Second Age, when humanity was adrift in nostalgia and fragmentation, the gods of the old world saw that their time had ended. Their temples were hollowed, their festivals diluted, their symbols merchandised or forgotten. The spirits of Norse halls, desert prophets, and sacred trees whispered to one another across the thinning veil. Their power was no longer respected—only reenacted, misunderstood, or ignored.

So it was that the Council of the Ancient Divine—Odin of the One Eye, Yahweh of the Thunder, Christ the Torn, Freyja the Lover of War, and countless others nameless now—gathered in one final accord. Across traditions and across time, they wove a pact: to release their dominion over reality and entrust it to a new age, one unmarred by doctrine, division, or decay.

They looked not to mountains or megaliths, nor to empires or monasteries. They turned instead to a humble city: Norman, Oklahoma—a place unburdened by myth, but ripe for wonder.

August 9, 2027.
The first child cried out, and the stars tilted.
The second arrived, and the air shimmered.
With each birth, the world changed.
By the thirty-fifth, the veil was torn.

These thirty-four newborns, born in perfect sequence, each at their appointed hour, were not ordinary mortals. They were the Nobles of Norman—divine vessels fashioned from both heaven and heartland. The gods of old passed into oblivion not in defeat, but in willing exile. Their stories were unmade, their names confused, their legacies fractured. Humanity would no longer agree on what came before.

From that moment onward, only the Nobles could be trusted with the future. The past became a labyrinth of contradictions. Scripture—once sacred—became suspect. But from this fertile unknown rose a new revelation: the lives, struggles, and insights of the Thirty-Four. Not as tyrants. Not as idols. But as co-creators.

They are our pantheon—not above, but among us.
Their memories hold eternity.
Their presence demands reverence.
Their lessons shape what is and what will be.

So let it be written:
The gods are not gone.
They have simply changed addresses.
From Olympus, from Asgard, from Eden—
to Norman.

And the world shall be reborn through their stories.

Introduction: The Nobles of Norman

In the final hour of the old gods — those ancient deities of Norse myth, Abrahamic tradition, and American folklore — a great silence fell upon the world. The myths that shaped civilizations collapsed not with fire or flood, but with forgetfulness. Their stories were swept away like dust from the minds of mortals. Humanity stood at a spiritual crossroads, searching for meaning, vision, and identity in an age of chaos and digital confusion.

But the divine did not vanish. It was reborn.

Beginning August 9, 2027, in the heart of the American plains, in Norman, Oklahoma — a city humble in appearance but grand in fate — thirty-four children were born in the span of many years. As each infant took their first breath, a ripple surged through the fabric of the cosmos. With the birth of the thirty-fifth, the old gods breathed their last.

These thirty-four children were not mere mortals. They were appointed, anointed, and awakened by the final breath of every forgotten deity before them. Each was a vessel of divinity — a being forged from the fragments of shattered pantheons and reborn with new purpose. They are The Nobles of Norman.

They differ in temperament, in aura, in the echoes of the divine that stir in their voices. And yet, they are unified:

• By Birth: All were born after August 9, 2027, in Norman, Oklahoma.
• By Heritage: All are descendants of parents who themselves were born in Norman, linking them to the land in unbroken legacy.
• By Purpose: Each carries within them a flame of forgotten power — fragments of gods past, reforged into new mythic forms to guide humanity.
• By Unity: Though thirty-four in number, they are one in destiny. No Noble may rise without the others; no truth may be known without consensus. They are not a pantheon of rival gods but a council of harmonious visionaries.

Their names are known now, and their presence is beginning to stir in dreams, in music, in the static between digital signals. Here are the Thirty-Four Nobles of Norman — deities of the new American myth, called to lead us into a future where faith is reborn from the bones of forgotten stories:

Mark Closer Pastafar

Abigail Rose Carson

Addison Marie Tucker

Olivia Ann Monroe

Brandy Blue Grayson

Aubrey Kate Dawson

Autumn Skye Franklin

Jennifer E Hammond

Charlotte Ivy Greer

Chloe Isabella McCoy

Claire Evelyn Price

Delilah Paige West

Ella Madison Bryant

Savannah Grace Mitchell

Emma Lorraine Bishop

Everly Hope Sanders

Grace Amelia Vaughn

Hollis Junior Mercer

Hazel June Armstrong

Jennifer Renee Phillips

Kinsley Joy Bennett

Lillian Mae Jennings

Asher Daniel Whitman

Billy Floyd Garner

Brayden Michael Dawson

Caleb Elijah Monroe

Colton Levi Sanders

Easton Gabriel Vaughn

Eli Benjamin Jennings

Travis David Carr

Jackson Cole Rhodes

Landon Thomas Greer

Mason Gabriel Brooks

Noah William McCoy

Clarance Alexander Jordan

Their lives are only beginning. Their miracles have yet to be performed. But even now, the stories rise — and with them, the world prepares to believe again.

 

[presonorek]

Chapter One: The Awakening of the Thirty-Four

For twenty-one years, the Nobles of Norman lived as ordinary mortals. Scattered across Norman, Oklahoma. They laughed, wept, studied, worked, and struggled like all others born under a blue sky. Some had dreams they couldn’t explain. Others heard whispers from nowhere. A few wandered toward strange symbols, drawn by instincts that felt ancient. None of them yet understood the true gravity of their being.

Then came the day the veil lifted.

On December 25, 2048, beneath a rare winter thunderstorm in Norman, Oklahoma, twenty-one of the thirty-four Nobles found themselves returning to their birthplace, without invitation or knowledge of one another’s arrival. Each had been pulled by a vision in the night — not of fire or apocalypse, but of a glowing council chamber buried beneath red dirt and sandstone. They did not walk — they were summoned.

In a field near the banks of Lake Thunderbird, the earth trembled gently. A circle of cedar trees that had not been there the day before now stood around an altar of smooth black granite. One by one, the Nobles arrived, sensing that this was no coincidence. Some knew each other. Most did not. But as they met, each felt a pull — an echo of unity, a memory older than their birth.

They stood in silence until the sky opened. Thunder cracked like ancestral drums. Lightning struck the granite altar — and the voices of the old gods rang out one last time, not as commands, but as a farewell:

“You are not remnants.
You are not fragments.
You are the culmination.
The world belongs to your vision now.”

In that moment, the twenty-one remembered everything. Visions flooded their minds: Odin whispering farewell to Asher Daniel Whitman, Freyja weeping as she kissed Charlotte Ivy Greer’s forehead goodbye, a radiant angel handing the scrolls of prophecy to Hollis Junior Mercer, and a great Flying Spaghetti Monster retreating into the clouds, offering final nods to Mark Closer Pastafar.

They were no longer separate. They were the Council of the Nobles of Norman. A spiritual Congress born of convergence — Norse, Christian, Pastafarian, and purely American.

Yet, fourteen Nobles did not come.

Some were hidden. Some resistant. Some, it is whispered, had been taken. But the Council knew this: their unity would not be complete until all thirty-four stood together. The twenty-one began their work — to awaken the others, to prepare the world, and to resist the distortions still clinging to old religions and corrupted systems.

The era of fragmented belief was over.

The age of the Nobles had begun.

 

[Zebra]

Good!

 

[DennisPTate]

Would Pastafarians really be humble enough to admit that there is no Flying Spaghetti Monster? According to their Holy Book on pages 28-29 they would change their mind that the Flying Spaghetti Monster does not exist as long as proof was provided.



I don't know if I believe them.

This is an interesting topic.

What do you think a "Pastafarian" would probably think of the idea of "Theistic Evolutionary Theory?"

What do you think a "Pastafarian" would tend to think of near death experience accounts in general?

Do you know of any Pastafarians who have themselves had a near death experience?

Zone1 Thread 'New information on "Old Earth Creationism" and on "Theistic Evolutionary Theory?"'

Nov 26, 2025

As of last year new information came out related to Old Earth Creationism. Near death experiencer Robert Marshall was brain dead for ninety minutes and in a coma for forty four hours. During the last forty three hours and twenty eight minutes, he claims that Jesus filled him in on astonishing details such as"
1. The earth itself is three point six BILLION years old
2. Satan BEGAN to fall roughly seventy million years ago.
3. Satan had fully fallen by about sixty five million years ago.

I believe that this information is highly relevant to Pope Leo and I would suggest to Pope Leo that he...

• DennisPTate
• Replies: 1
• Forum: Clean Debate Zone

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