Age Difference Remark I've Never Understood

[Cecilie1200]

I'm a forty-year-old woman. My friends, typically, are men in their early twenties or so. As an example, my two closest buddies at the moment are 24 and 19 (both male). This isn't any deliberate choice on my part. It's simply that many of my hobbies and interests tend to be things that attract mostly men in that age group.

What I don't understand is that people are always glibly telling me that a woman my age shouldn't have anything in common with men that age. This always confuses me, and I can't ever get a clarification on it. WHY shouldn't I have anything in common with a 24-year-old man? It isn't as though a 16-year age difference makes us from different species. Is there some magic age at which the hobbies and things I liked when I was twenty should have changed to whatever the hell it is a forty-year-old woman is "supposed" to do?

I can certainly understand if people were accusing me of being a predatory dirty old woman trying to get my sexual hooks into young boys (which I do sometimes hear). But that isn't the same thing. For one thing, merely saying that acknowledges the one thing any heterosexual man and heterosexual woman have in common, at least in theory. And I can understand and agree with the idea that we're not at the same place in our lives, although that doesn't necessarily make me an undesirable friend to them, since I can offer advice and perspective based on life experience that they don't otherwise have available.

Can any of you shed light on what these "age-appropriate" interests are that I'm supposed to have, that are apparently supposed to make me incapable of relating to and enjoying the company of someone younger than me?

 

[del]

no. thanks for asking.

 

[Agnapostate]

Well, now...in the interests of reciprocation...need a new avatar?

 

[manu1959]

hey...if you can nail a flat belly....more power to ya

 

[Xenophon]

Talk about a thread that has no right answer too..

 

[Ravi]

eek! It doesn't surprise me that you can't relate to women in your peer group in real life.

 

[KittenKoder]

I'm a forty-year-old woman. My friends, typically, are men in their early twenties or so. As an example, my two closest buddies at the moment are 24 and 19 (both male). This isn't any deliberate choice on my part. It's simply that many of my hobbies and interests tend to be things that attract mostly men in that age group.

What I don't understand is that people are always glibly telling me that a woman my age shouldn't have anything in common with men that age. This always confuses me, and I can't ever get a clarification on it. WHY shouldn't I have anything in common with a 24-year-old man? It isn't as though a 16-year age difference makes us from different species. Is there some magic age at which the hobbies and things I liked when I was twenty should have changed to whatever the hell it is a forty-year-old woman is "supposed" to do?

I can certainly understand if people were accusing me of being a predatory dirty old woman trying to get my sexual hooks into young boys (which I do sometimes hear). But that isn't the same thing. For one thing, merely saying that acknowledges the one thing any heterosexual man and heterosexual woman have in common, at least in theory. And I can understand and agree with the idea that we're not at the same place in our lives, although that doesn't necessarily make me an undesirable friend to them, since I can offer advice and perspective based on life experience that they don't otherwise have available.

Can any of you shed light on what these "age-appropriate" interests are that I'm supposed to have, that are apparently supposed to make me incapable of relating to and enjoying the company of someone younger than me?

Welcome to the world of straight people, where it's always about sex ... sorry, but that's what they are thinking, that your and the men's interest is in "dating" or sexual.

 

[editec]

Can any of you shed light on what these "age-appropriate" interests are that I'm supposed to have, that are apparently supposed to make me incapable of relating to and enjoying the company of someone younger than me?

Pay no attention to the idle gossip and chatter, Cecile.

These biddies are jealous, that's all.

 

[alan1]

I'm a forty-year-old woman. My friends, typically, are men in their early twenties or so. As an example, my two closest buddies at the moment are 24 and 19 (both male). This isn't any deliberate choice on my part. It's simply that many of my hobbies and interests tend to be things that attract mostly men in that age group.

What I don't understand is that people are always glibly telling me that a woman my age shouldn't have anything in common with men that age. This always confuses me, and I can't ever get a clarification on it. WHY shouldn't I have anything in common with a 24-year-old man? It isn't as though a 16-year age difference makes us from different species. Is there some magic age at which the hobbies and things I liked when I was twenty should have changed to whatever the hell it is a forty-year-old woman is "supposed" to do?

I can certainly understand if people were accusing me of being a predatory dirty old woman trying to get my sexual hooks into young boys (which I do sometimes hear). But that isn't the same thing. For one thing, merely saying that acknowledges the one thing any heterosexual man and heterosexual woman have in common, at least in theory. And I can understand and agree with the idea that we're not at the same place in our lives, although that doesn't necessarily make me an undesirable friend to them, since I can offer advice and perspective based on life experience that they don't otherwise have available.

Can any of you shed light on what these "age-appropriate" interests are that I'm supposed to have, that are apparently supposed to make me incapable of relating to and enjoying the company of someone younger than me?

You know 19-24 year old men that are interested in knitting and quilting?
Are you sure they aren't gay?

Seriously though, I'm in my mid-40's and have friends (both male and female) that range in age from 20 to 70. Friendships based upon common interest. I only get comments about the female friends that are either significantly older or younger than I am.

 

[strollingbones]

my friends range in age from 16...to well over 80......i am get on well with younger men and why does everyone assumes its the older women doing the chasinging....my son is 26..he talks about cougars a lot....i am not sure he is cougar meat...he is more the shogun type

 

[strollingbones]

o your question....sometimes i forget it is not all about me....

men your age are jealous....women your age are jealous ..they cant reach beyond their narrow or closed minds to accept anything they find outside of their social "norms"

 

[JBeukema]

Just ask them 'What, guys don't like you?' and walk away...

 

[007]

I'm a forty-year-old woman. My friends, typically, are men in their early twenties or so. As an example, my two closest buddies at the moment are 24 and 19 (both male). This isn't any deliberate choice on my part. It's simply that many of my hobbies and interests tend to be things that attract mostly men in that age group.

What I don't understand is that people are always glibly telling me that a woman my age shouldn't have anything in common with men that age. This always confuses me, and I can't ever get a clarification on it. WHY shouldn't I have anything in common with a 24-year-old man? It isn't as though a 16-year age difference makes us from different species. Is there some magic age at which the hobbies and things I liked when I was twenty should have changed to whatever the hell it is a forty-year-old woman is "supposed" to do?

I can certainly understand if people were accusing me of being a predatory dirty old woman trying to get my sexual hooks into young boys (which I do sometimes hear). But that isn't the same thing. For one thing, merely saying that acknowledges the one thing any heterosexual man and heterosexual woman have in common, at least in theory. And I can understand and agree with the idea that we're not at the same place in our lives, although that doesn't necessarily make me an undesirable friend to them, since I can offer advice and perspective based on life experience that they don't otherwise have available.

Can any of you shed light on what these "age-appropriate" interests are that I'm supposed to have, that are apparently supposed to make me incapable of relating to and enjoying the company of someone younger than me?

Why don't you be a little more specific here and tell us what these "interests" you have in common with young men are. Maybe then people can respond better with a more direct answer to your query.

 

[random3434]

Some of my gal pals like to hang out in bars where there's just nothing to do, but look at other people. I'd rather be doing something, like listening to live music or watching a game, or playing pool or darts. I find my guy friends like to do these things too, though I do have one friend (girl) who will go play pool with me. She and I make a good team!



The age thing is no big deal if you're just hanging out, one of my good buddies (he's a cop who just became a teacher) is in his mid 20's-he's a BLAST to hang out with!

 

[Cecilie1200]

I'm a forty-year-old woman. My friends, typically, are men in their early twenties or so. As an example, my two closest buddies at the moment are 24 and 19 (both male). This isn't any deliberate choice on my part. It's simply that many of my hobbies and interests tend to be things that attract mostly men in that age group.

What I don't understand is that people are always glibly telling me that a woman my age shouldn't have anything in common with men that age. This always confuses me, and I can't ever get a clarification on it. WHY shouldn't I have anything in common with a 24-year-old man? It isn't as though a 16-year age difference makes us from different species. Is there some magic age at which the hobbies and things I liked when I was twenty should have changed to whatever the hell it is a forty-year-old woman is "supposed" to do?

I can certainly understand if people were accusing me of being a predatory dirty old woman trying to get my sexual hooks into young boys (which I do sometimes hear). But that isn't the same thing. For one thing, merely saying that acknowledges the one thing any heterosexual man and heterosexual woman have in common, at least in theory. And I can understand and agree with the idea that we're not at the same place in our lives, although that doesn't necessarily make me an undesirable friend to them, since I can offer advice and perspective based on life experience that they don't otherwise have available.

Can any of you shed light on what these "age-appropriate" interests are that I'm supposed to have, that are apparently supposed to make me incapable of relating to and enjoying the company of someone younger than me?

You know 19-24 year old men that are interested in knitting and quilting?
Are you sure they aren't gay?

Seriously though, I'm in my mid-40's and have friends (both male and female) that range in age from 20 to 70. Friendships based upon common interest. I only get comments about the female friends that are either significantly older or younger than I am.

People have dirty minds, what can I say?

Although I do knit, quilt, and a variety of other needlecrafts, those are not the interests I share with my male friends. More like sci-fi, roleplaying and computer games, the arguing over who was the best Star Trek captain, and naturally, anything SCA.

Again, I can fully understand it when people think I'm being a sexual predator or comment about differences in life experience. I just am honestly confused when they insist that fifteen years age difference means you can't possibly have any common interests. WTF?

 

[Agnapostate]

 

[Cecilie1200]

I'm a forty-year-old woman. My friends, typically, are men in their early twenties or so. As an example, my two closest buddies at the moment are 24 and 19 (both male). This isn't any deliberate choice on my part. It's simply that many of my hobbies and interests tend to be things that attract mostly men in that age group.

What I don't understand is that people are always glibly telling me that a woman my age shouldn't have anything in common with men that age. This always confuses me, and I can't ever get a clarification on it. WHY shouldn't I have anything in common with a 24-year-old man? It isn't as though a 16-year age difference makes us from different species. Is there some magic age at which the hobbies and things I liked when I was twenty should have changed to whatever the hell it is a forty-year-old woman is "supposed" to do?

I can certainly understand if people were accusing me of being a predatory dirty old woman trying to get my sexual hooks into young boys (which I do sometimes hear). But that isn't the same thing. For one thing, merely saying that acknowledges the one thing any heterosexual man and heterosexual woman have in common, at least in theory. And I can understand and agree with the idea that we're not at the same place in our lives, although that doesn't necessarily make me an undesirable friend to them, since I can offer advice and perspective based on life experience that they don't otherwise have available.

Can any of you shed light on what these "age-appropriate" interests are that I'm supposed to have, that are apparently supposed to make me incapable of relating to and enjoying the company of someone younger than me?

Why don't you be a little more specific here and tell us what these "interests" you have in common with young men are. Maybe then people can respond better with a more direct answer to your query.

Okay. Both of them are members of the Society for Creative Anachronism, as am I. So right there, we have many of the same friends and social contacts, we attend fighter practice together every week, we attend Society functions and parties together . . . We all three like sci fi/fantasy books and movies, and share the former amongst us and go to see the latter together. We all three play many of the same games, computer and otherwise.

Blair, the twenty-four-year-old, is interested in several types of craftwork, such as chainmail jewelry and leatherworking. I make chainmail jewelry, and he is teaching me about leatherwork. We share similar political views.

Len, the 19-year-old, likes a lot of the same music I do. He wants to major in theatre tech in college, so we go to a lot of local theatre productions together.

 

[alan1]

I'm a forty-year-old woman. My friends, typically, are men in their early twenties or so. As an example, my two closest buddies at the moment are 24 and 19 (both male). This isn't any deliberate choice on my part. It's simply that many of my hobbies and interests tend to be things that attract mostly men in that age group.

What I don't understand is that people are always glibly telling me that a woman my age shouldn't have anything in common with men that age. This always confuses me, and I can't ever get a clarification on it. WHY shouldn't I have anything in common with a 24-year-old man? It isn't as though a 16-year age difference makes us from different species. Is there some magic age at which the hobbies and things I liked when I was twenty should have changed to whatever the hell it is a forty-year-old woman is "supposed" to do?

I can certainly understand if people were accusing me of being a predatory dirty old woman trying to get my sexual hooks into young boys (which I do sometimes hear). But that isn't the same thing. For one thing, merely saying that acknowledges the one thing any heterosexual man and heterosexual woman have in common, at least in theory. And I can understand and agree with the idea that we're not at the same place in our lives, although that doesn't necessarily make me an undesirable friend to them, since I can offer advice and perspective based on life experience that they don't otherwise have available.

Can any of you shed light on what these "age-appropriate" interests are that I'm supposed to have, that are apparently supposed to make me incapable of relating to and enjoying the company of someone younger than me?

You know 19-24 year old men that are interested in knitting and quilting?
Are you sure they aren't gay?

Seriously though, I'm in my mid-40's and have friends (both male and female) that range in age from 20 to 70. Friendships based upon common interest. I only get comments about the female friends that are either significantly older or younger than I am.

People have dirty minds, what can I say?

Although I do knit, quilt, and a variety of other needlecrafts, those are not the interests I share with my male friends. More like sci-fi, roleplaying and computer games, the arguing over who was the best Star Trek captain, and naturally, anything SCA.

Again, I can fully understand it when people think I'm being a sexual predator or comment about differences in life experience. I just am honestly confused when they insist that fifteen years age difference means you can't possibly have any common interests. WTF?

haha, computer games. My dad is pushing 70 and he kicks internet ass at Unreal Tournament, Doom and few other games I don't play. He must be a sexual predator.

 

[Burp]

can any of you shed light on what these "age-appropriate" interests are that i'm supposed to have, that are apparently supposed to make me incapable of relating to and enjoying the company of someone younger than me?

pay no attention to the idle gossip and chatter, cecile.

These biddies are jealous, that's all.

x2

 

[Gunny]

eek! It doesn't surprise me that you can't relate to women in your peer group in real life.

Doesn't surprise me either. Who CAN relate to women in her peer group?