Why I'm Depressed

Discussion in 'Humor' started by SFC Ollie, Sep 6, 2010.

  1. SFC Ollie
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    SFC Ollie Still Marching

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    Over five thousand years ago, Moses said to the children of Israel, "Pick up your shovels, mount your asses and camels, and I will lead you to the Promised Land."

    Nearly 75 years ago, (when Welfare was introduced) Roosevelt said, "Lay down your shovels, sit on your asses, and light up a Camel, this is the Promised Land."

    Today, Obama has stolen your shovel, taxed your asses, raised the price of camels and mortgaged the Promised Land!

    I was so depressed last night thinking about Health Care Plans, the economy, the wars, lost jobs, savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc . . . I called a Suicide Hotline. I had to press 1 for English.

    I was connected to a call center in Pakistan. I told them I was suicidal. They got excited and asked if I could drive a truck......
     
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  2. CMike
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    CMike Zionist, proud to be

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    Lol
     
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  3. California Girl
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    California Girl BANNED

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    Apparently..... I must spread my rep. Damned Gunny and his stupid rep rules!
     
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  4. syrenn
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    syrenn BANNED

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    LMAO

    Good one Ollie
     
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  5. Big Black Dog
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    Big Black Dog Gold Member Supporting Member

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    ROFLMAO. Thanks for the chuckle.
     
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  6. Mad Scientist
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    Mad Scientist Deplorable Gold Supporting Member Supporting Member

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    On an episode of The Simpsons Marge called the National Suicide Hotline, was put on hold and heard this tune: (true story)

    [youtube]6QEDb3xzdec[/youtube]
     
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