Hi Everyone. I'm Here to Discuss Gardening.

[Moonglow]

I'm building a house and I want to learn all about this whole gardening thing.

What do I need to know?

Don't garden in the house unless you have astroturf.

 

[Moonglow]

The FZ is a great place to learn all about weed, but my HOA doesn't allow it.

And it's 30-fucking-grand for landscaping.

So if I'm going to lay out that much cash, I want to do it in the most pretentious way possible!

Do it like they do in Bella Vista, Arkanslaw, a retirement community, the old fucks have gravel for a yard.

 

[JustAnotherNut]

If you're hiring landscapers, you don't need to know anything other than paying the bill

 

[mudwhistle]

Here's what I'm trying to do. I'm moving into a new fancy-dancy neighborhood and am building a big honkin' house, and I want to be able tell my neighbors, "I'm better than you."

What sort of gardening things do I need to do that?

It's simple.
You find some professional landscapers and have them plan out a garden for you.....and then pay through the butt for it, then you tell your neighbors you designed it.
They won't care if you did it with your own two hands because nobody in their neighborhood gets their hands dirty.
You designed it, so technically you did it......if you're a snobby rich person.

 

[Indeependent]

I'm building a house and I want to learn all about this whole gardening thing.

What do I need to know?

Hire a Mexican.

 

[Intolerant]

Here's what I'm trying to do. I'm moving into a new fancy-dancy neighborhood and am building a big honkin' house, and I want to be able tell my neighbors, "I'm better than you."

What sort of gardening things do I need to do that?

Start with an indoor garden ...

Which should help pay for the massive cost of professional landscaping.

Well shit I see I will have to move my grow lab.

 

[Ridgerunner]

Canadian Thistle is a must to impress new neighbors... Find some in a ditch somewhere and carefully grab a couple of bulbs and take them back to you yard and bust them open... and voilà a whole neighbor hood of absolutely beautiful weeds...

 

[mudwhistle]

I'm building a house and I want to learn all about this whole gardening thing.

What do I need to know?

Hire a Mexican.

I did that once.
It didn't work.

 

[JustAnotherNut]

Build a mote, then they'll really think you're better than they are

 

[fncceo]

Here's what I'm trying to do. I'm moving into a new fancy-dancy neighborhood and am building a big honkin' house, and I want to be able tell my neighbors, "I'm better than you."

What sort of gardening things do I need to do that?

Start with an indoor garden ...

Which should help pay for the massive cost of professional landscaping.

Well shit I see I will have to move my grow lab.

Just to let you know ... we already know where the crop houses are. There is currently a backlog of more than a dozen search warrants waiting to be served on known crop houses in my city. They'll get to yours soon, be patient.

 

[Moonglow]

Here's what I'm trying to do. I'm moving into a new fancy-dancy neighborhood and am building a big honkin' house, and I want to be able tell my neighbors, "I'm better than you."

What sort of gardening things do I need to do that?

Start with an indoor garden ...

Which should help pay for the massive cost of professional landscaping.

Well shit I see I will have to move my grow lab.

You could just put up a tent.

 

[WheelieAddict]

Another tip buy a pressure washer and a good 100 ft hose or two and extension cords. You don't need to spend a ton there are basic electric ones for around $100 or so that are good enough if you aren't using them commercially. They are lightweight and very easy to use. Use it to clean siding, walkways, outdoor furniture, driveways, grills, etc. Your place will look sparkly clean and new. You can wash your vehicles with it too.

I have a high powered gas one yet use a cheap hypertough 1500 electric from walmart more around the house because it is light and so easy to use and just powerful enough to do a good enough job. Takes longer though. Here is a different electric than mine performs about the same:

 

[Moonglow]

Here's what I'm trying to do. I'm moving into a new fancy-dancy neighborhood and am building a big honkin' house, and I want to be able tell my neighbors, "I'm better than you."

What sort of gardening things do I need to do that?

Start with an indoor garden ...

Which should help pay for the massive cost of professional landscaping.

Well shit I see I will have to move my grow lab.

Just to let you know ... we already know where the crop houses are. There is currently a backlog of more than a dozen search warrants waiting to be served on known crop houses in my city. They'll get to yours soon, be patient.

“The only thing that saves us from the bureaucracy is its inefficiency.” ~ Eugene McCarthy

 

[del]

grow fiblings

 

[percysunshine]

Another tip buy a pressure washer and a good 100 ft hose or two and extension cords. You don't need to spend a ton there are basic electric ones for around $100 or so that are good enough if you aren't using them commercially. They are lightweight and very easy to use. Use it to clean siding, walkways, outdoor furniture, driveways, grills, etc. Your place will look sparkly clean and new. You can wash your vehicles with it too.

I have a high powered gas one yet use a cheap hypertough 1500 electric from walmart more around the house because it is light and so easy to use and just powerful enough to do a good enough job. Takes longer though. Here is a different electric than mine performs about the same:

Pfft...I have one of those. It eats electricity faster than a wolf can eat a hamster. I was using it when the wife turned on her hair dryer, and the power drain blew every fuse in the house.

Go with gasoline...it is cheaper than electricity.

 

[Indeependent]

I'm building a house and I want to learn all about this whole gardening thing.

What do I need to know?

Hire a Mexican.

I did that once.
It didn't work.

American citizens only...20+ years.

 

[WheelieAddict]

Another tip buy a pressure washer and a good 100 ft hose or two and extension cords. You don't need to spend a ton there are basic electric ones for around $100 or so that are good enough if you aren't using them commercially. They are lightweight and very easy to use. Use it to clean siding, walkways, outdoor furniture, driveways, grills, etc. Your place will look sparkly clean and new. You can wash your vehicles with it too.

I have a high powered gas one yet use a cheap hypertough 1500 electric from walmart more around the house because it is light and so easy to use and just powerful enough to do a good enough job. Takes longer though. Here is a different electric than mine performs about the same:

Pfft...I have one of those. It eats electricity faster than a wolf can eat a hamster. I was using it when the wife turned on her hair dryer, and the power drain blew every fuse in the house.

Go with gasoline...it is cheaper than electricity.

Gas are better without question but these are cheap and much lighter/easy to haul around. Good for easy around the house stuff. I use mine all the time and never have problems with blowing fuses. You might want to update your electric.

 

[fncceo]

Here's what I'm trying to do. I'm moving into a new fancy-dancy neighborhood and am building a big honkin' house, and I want to be able tell my neighbors, "I'm better than you."

What sort of gardening things do I need to do that?

Start with an indoor garden ...

Which should help pay for the massive cost of professional landscaping.

Well shit I see I will have to move my grow lab.

Just to let you know ... we already know where the crop houses are. There is currently a backlog of more than a dozen search warrants waiting to be served on known crop houses in my city. They'll get to yours soon, be patient.

“The only thing that saves us from the bureaucracy is its inefficiency.” ~ Eugene McCarthy

I don't believe truer words have ever been spoken.

 

[yiostheoy]

I'm building a house and I want to learn all about this whole gardening thing.

What do I need to know?

Plant your garden on the SOUTH side of your home where it will get sun all day long not in the shade on the north, east, or west.

Mix your soil with steer manure.

Add phosphate fertilizer or else rotate the crops over 3 years with clover in the 3rd year.

Water your garden during the nighttime until it is flooded.

Use powder insecticide or else get a bunch of spiders for it to kill the other bugs.

 

[WheelieAddict]

Here's what I'm trying to do. I'm moving into a new fancy-dancy neighborhood and am building a big honkin' house, and I want to be able tell my neighbors, "I'm better than you."

What sort of gardening things do I need to do that?

Start with an indoor garden ...

Which should help pay for the massive cost of professional landscaping.

Well shit I see I will have to move my grow lab.

Just to let you know ... we already know where the crop houses are. There is currently a backlog of more than a dozen search warrants waiting to be served on known crop houses in my city. They'll get to yours soon, be patient.

Well he can always just grow outdoors in a cornfield like they used to do in the olden days.