- Sep 22, 2013
- 4,956
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This is a capitalism-paranoia tale (spiced by some vampire-lore) inspired by the fortune-cutthroat film Blood and Wine.
Cheers,
====
Arand was a powerful and handsome young Romanian prince...and vampire! Arand kept a bold ancient sword in his armoire and never told anyone about its secret origins (that it was given to him by none other than the great Count Dracula, the 'father-figure' to all vampires). Arand travelled to America to interview First Lady Melania Trump, since he was drawn to her charms and how she wore fancy outfits on TV with her husband U.S. President Donald Trump. Arand pretended to be a Romanian anthropologist doing a special interview-piece for a thesis he was writing about the role of women in capitalism!
Arand was impressed with Melania and wanted to have a productive discussion with her.
MELANIA: Well, I'm glad a Romanian 'scholar' is interested in American politics!
ARAND: Indeed, I am; you seem very comfortable in the White House, Mrs. Trump.
MELANIA: I really am, and I'm proud of what my husband (our President) is doing.
ARAND: How do you feel about the way he's dealing with North Korea?
MELANIA: That entire nuclear-missile test fiasco around Labor Day was challenging, but we endured...
ARAND: That's excellent. What are your thoughts on this modern world of commerce-driven politics?
MELANIA: I'm excited about what our President has in store for NATO, the EU, and the World Bank!
ARAND: Yes, I suppose that's why Americans elected a 'capitalism-guru' as its President.
MELANIA: Indeed. Capitalism is the 'lifeblood' of modern politics.
ARAND: I agree. Are you a fan of the Wall Street films?
MELANIA: I like the 'vampire-esque' capitalism-baron Gordon Gekko in those Oliver Stone films.
ARAND: Yes, Gekko is a 'new age vampire,' is he not? You're not 'frightened' by him?
MELANIA: I see nothing 'dangerous' about well-managed commerce, young man.
ARAND: Cool. Thanks for your time. Perhaps our paths will cross again...
Arand took his interview notes and then gave them to the KGB and told them they were part of a secret new conspiracy involving the American government using media and gender-politics and liberal points to persuade the world to ally against China and North Korea. The KGB was stunned, but the cunning Arand explained that Americans were like 'capitalism vampires.' Arand then travelled to Hong Kong where he did some nefarious black market munitions dealings in the underworld and sold some chemical weapons to the terrorist organization ISIS (which was now allied to North Korea!).
President Trump was in the Oval Office when First Lady Melania walked in to talk to him about her 'special interview' with the Romanian 'scholar' Arand (an anthropologist!). Melania told her husband she felt satisfied with how she conveyed the Trump Administration's policy of vigilance regarding modern commerce-gauged politics and capitalism idealism, but Trump realized that Arand may have been some kind of spy! President Trump remembered a dream he had a few nights earlier (while napping) in which a strange vampire-prince (named Arand!) visited him and ominously told him, "Your wife will offer misleading liberal idealism to your apocalyptic adversaries." Arand had won.
====
Cheers,
====
Arand was a powerful and handsome young Romanian prince...and vampire! Arand kept a bold ancient sword in his armoire and never told anyone about its secret origins (that it was given to him by none other than the great Count Dracula, the 'father-figure' to all vampires). Arand travelled to America to interview First Lady Melania Trump, since he was drawn to her charms and how she wore fancy outfits on TV with her husband U.S. President Donald Trump. Arand pretended to be a Romanian anthropologist doing a special interview-piece for a thesis he was writing about the role of women in capitalism!
Arand was impressed with Melania and wanted to have a productive discussion with her.
MELANIA: Well, I'm glad a Romanian 'scholar' is interested in American politics!
ARAND: Indeed, I am; you seem very comfortable in the White House, Mrs. Trump.
MELANIA: I really am, and I'm proud of what my husband (our President) is doing.
ARAND: How do you feel about the way he's dealing with North Korea?
MELANIA: That entire nuclear-missile test fiasco around Labor Day was challenging, but we endured...
ARAND: That's excellent. What are your thoughts on this modern world of commerce-driven politics?
MELANIA: I'm excited about what our President has in store for NATO, the EU, and the World Bank!
ARAND: Yes, I suppose that's why Americans elected a 'capitalism-guru' as its President.
MELANIA: Indeed. Capitalism is the 'lifeblood' of modern politics.
ARAND: I agree. Are you a fan of the Wall Street films?
MELANIA: I like the 'vampire-esque' capitalism-baron Gordon Gekko in those Oliver Stone films.
ARAND: Yes, Gekko is a 'new age vampire,' is he not? You're not 'frightened' by him?
MELANIA: I see nothing 'dangerous' about well-managed commerce, young man.
ARAND: Cool. Thanks for your time. Perhaps our paths will cross again...
Arand took his interview notes and then gave them to the KGB and told them they were part of a secret new conspiracy involving the American government using media and gender-politics and liberal points to persuade the world to ally against China and North Korea. The KGB was stunned, but the cunning Arand explained that Americans were like 'capitalism vampires.' Arand then travelled to Hong Kong where he did some nefarious black market munitions dealings in the underworld and sold some chemical weapons to the terrorist organization ISIS (which was now allied to North Korea!).
President Trump was in the Oval Office when First Lady Melania walked in to talk to him about her 'special interview' with the Romanian 'scholar' Arand (an anthropologist!). Melania told her husband she felt satisfied with how she conveyed the Trump Administration's policy of vigilance regarding modern commerce-gauged politics and capitalism idealism, but Trump realized that Arand may have been some kind of spy! President Trump remembered a dream he had a few nights earlier (while napping) in which a strange vampire-prince (named Arand!) visited him and ominously told him, "Your wife will offer misleading liberal idealism to your apocalyptic adversaries." Arand had won.
====
