Your Own Original Puns, Nobody Elses! Or Else!

[ChemEngineer]

Rita Morales loved her fist name and so she named her first daughter “Rita.” They entered a mother-daughter beauty contest and there was some difficulty telling which was the mother. A judge asked Mr. Morales which was his wife. He replied “Senior Rita is on the left.”

Judge: “How are you spelling that?”

 

[ChemEngineer]

Young woman in court suing her boyfriend, demanding he marry her. “He said he would take me to Maine and marry me, your honor.” Judge: “Is this correct, sir?” Boyfriend: “NO SIR. I SAID I WAS GOING TO BANG HER.”

 

[ChemEngineer]

A small group of wealthy nobles of Europe hired brilliant tutors to educate them. Afterward they collaborated to write a science book, hoping to enlighten the nobles who had not been tutored.

After careful consideration, they titled their book

It's the Counts That Thought

 

[ChemEngineer]

Composers of their era agreed to sit for a painting to be hung in the great museum of Berlin.

The artist was preparing to start and he looked at the subjects of his work and said, “Wolfgang and Ludwig are here but where is Franz Josef?”

Mozart answered, “He’s hidin’.”

Artist: “Well then what about Johann Sebastian?”

Beethoven replied, “He’ll be back.”

 

[ChemEngineer]

 

[ChemEngineer]

Hurley was a 220-pound weightlifter who was always angry because he had never won a weightlifting competition.
Determined to win, he transgendered and changed his name to Shirley.

Surly Shirley was surely burly.

[Come to think of it, many Leftists on my Ignore List are surly Shirleys.]

 

[ChemEngineer]

 

[BackAgain]

I am forbidden from entering this contest.

My daughter has had enough of my dad jokes.

 

[ChemEngineer]

I am forbidden from entering this contest.

My daughter has had enough of my dad jokes.

How old is your precious daughter?
I have two of them and created websites to delight kids:

Many Moons

manymoons1.wordpress.com

Don't read the short story in advance. Let it surprise you along with your audience.

Good Fun For Good Kids

good-kids-fun.blogspot.com

 

[BackAgain]

How old is your precious daughter?
I have two of them and created websites to delight kids:

Many Moons

manymoons1.wordpress.com

Don't read the short story in advance. Let it surprise you along with your audience.

Good Fun For Good Kids

good-kids-fun.blogspot.com

She is old enough to know work in a school system.

But I may read your handiwork anyway.

I have in the past!

 

[ChemEngineer]

She is old enough to know work in a school system.

But I may read your handiwork anyway.

I have in the past!

Were you not glad you did? Others here have enjoyed my book and said as much on these pages.

 

[BackAgain]

Were you not glad you did? Others here have enjoyed my book and said as much on these pages.

I have too!

 

[ChemEngineer]

I thought of this one yesterday while playing tennis. The mind works in mysterious ways......
__________________________________