Warsaw Pact era joke from Czechoslovakia

[Mushroom]

I was a CEO of big company. I was driving corporate Tatra 613. Every morning, coffee was brewed by sexy secretary assistant. One day, they asked me to contribute 5000 crowns for the funeral of the member of Central Committee of the Communist Party. I said that for 5000 crowns I will bury the whole committee.

Since then I was CEO of small company. I was driving corporate Tatra 603 and coffee was brewed by old, ugly secretary assistant. Then they reproached me for not attending last party meeting. I said that if I knew it will be the last, I would come with banners.

Since then I was master worker. I drove my own car, I brew my own coffee. I had one painting of of Husák and one of Lollobrigida on the wall. They said to remove that bitch. So I removed painting of Husák.

Since then I worked as a manual labour with shovel. I was riding a bike and I brought my coffee from home in thermos. One day, as I was digging they came and said to hide my bike, because Soviet delegation will be visiting. I said that my bike is locked and insured.

Since then I'm unemployed.


For those that do not know, the Tatra 613 was a luxury car, the 603 was a mid level. Gustáv Husák was the First Secretary of the Communist Party in Czechoslovakia from 1975-1989. Gina Lollobrigida was an Italian actress and sex symbol of the 1960's.

 

[Ringo]

After the war, Sebr, Russian and Czech met.
- I was in Tito's partisan brigade, we killed a lot of gпermans, - said the Serb
- And I worked underground. We were sabotaging the nazis on the railway," the Russian replied.
- You are the lucky ones! - the Czech answered them with a sigh - the germans forbade us to do all this...