Spanking

[Bonnie]

I was spanked a few times by my mother only, my dad is a big guy and was afraid he would hurt me. But my mother was good for a swack when I ran out in the street or parking lots. Cured me of that bad habit in a jiffy

 

[Shattered]

Yeah... well... I was going to post it in the music thread for you and... your spanking partner...

Hey now.

 

[misterblu]

if you are hitting your child to control their behaviour you have no fucking clue what it takes to motivate a human being to do what you want

Enlighten us. What is the correct way to control a child's behaviour?

 

[Shattered]

Enlighten us. What is the correct way to control a child's behaviour?

Children are miniature human beings..They can be taught. Talked to. Reasoned with. Shown there are consequences to their actions that they won't like. Those consequences need not always involve hitting. Children also often follow the adults examples..

 

[Annie]

Children are miniature human beings..They can be taught. Talked to. Reasoned with. Shown there are consequences to their actions that they won't like. Those consequences need not always involve hitting. Children also often follow the adults examples..

I'm against spanking, but the above isn't quite on target, at least for preschoolers. There isn't time for reasoning with a 4 year old, that just won't get that running into the street is a bad idea, same with playing on the railroad tracks.

 

[Shattered]

I'm against spanking, but the above isn't quite on target, at least for preschoolers. There isn't time for reasoning with a 4 year old, that just won't get that running into the street is a bad idea, same with playing on the railroad tracks.

Psst! I said "need not <b>always</b> involve hitting...", fulling admitting there are occasions when a spanking is necessary... Just not as often as some people think they should be administered...

 

[Annie]

Psst! I said "need not <b>always</b> involve hitting...", fulling admitting there are occasions when a spanking is necessary... Just not as often as some people think they should be administered...

Understood. Personally I think spanking is seldom the way to go, I didn't spank any of the kids, until a very good shrink convinced me that it was the option of last resort with the youngest, who had power issues. He's doing fine now, so would have to assume that the recommendation, after seeing the child for over 8 months before making such a suggestion, was a good one.

 

[Shattered]

Personally, spanking never did a thing to "teach" me anything.. The one thing I remember the most from my childhood had absolutely nothing to do with a spanking.. I used to throw temper tantrums..would get spanked for them.. kept throwing them..

Finally, I was out shopping with my Grandmother when I was about 5.. I wanted something, she said no, for whatever reason, and I proceeded to throw myself on the ground, kick, and scream my fool head off.

She looked down at me, stepped over me, and proceeded to walk out the door, and to the car, leaving me to my tantrum. (I didn't know that she knew the counter clerk, and indicated to her what she was doing, so the entire store didn't think I was being abandoned...)

Something in that finally hit home. I never threw another temper tantrum...and she didn't have to raise a hand to me.

 

[misterblu]

Children are miniature human beings..They can be taught. Talked to. Reasoned with. Shown there are consequences to their actions that they won't like. Those consequences need not always involve hitting. Children also often follow the adults examples..

I agree wholeheartedly.

Spanking is just another tool in a parent's arsenal.

 

[no1tovote4]

I agree wholeheartedly.

Spanking is just another tool in a parent's arsenal.

It is a powertool that should be used only under specific circumstances, IMO. It's not the Duct Tape in the toolbox, it is more like the sautering iron, you just don't use it quite as often...

 

[GotZoom]

Personally, spanking never did a thing to "teach" me anything.. The one thing I remember the most from my childhood had absolutely nothing to do with a spanking.. I used to throw temper tantrums..would get spanked for them.. kept throwing them..

Finally, I was out shopping with my Grandmother when I was about 5.. I wanted something, she said no, for whatever reason, and I proceeded to throw myself on the ground, kick, and scream my fool head off.

She looked down at me, stepped over me, and proceeded to walk out the door, and to the car, leaving me to my tantrum. (I didn't know that she knew the counter clerk, and indicated to her what she was doing, so the entire store didn't think I was being abandoned...)

Something in that finally hit home. I never threw another temper tantrum...and she didn't have to raise a hand to me.

Reminds me of a friend who had two kids. The kids were terrible travelers. They had planned a trip to DisneyWorld but knew the 6 hour drive ahead of them was going to be the pits. They loaded up the car and took off.

About an hour into the trip, the kids started screaming and fighting. Dad gave the usual "If you don't stop, we're turning around and going home speech." They kids stopped for about 10 minutes, then right back up again.

Dad turned the car around and went home. Kids cried and begged all the way home and the rest of the day - Promising to never do it again, etc. Dad held firm; said they weren't going to DW this year.

The next morning, Dad asked the kids if they wanted to try again. Of course they said yes and also promised to be perfect angels on the entire trip.

They took off and the entire vacation, trip there, DW, and the trip back was wonderful. Not a single word of arguing out of either kid.

What the kids didn't know was that Dad never made reservations for the first day. He KNEW there would be problems so he purposely left a day before vacation was suppose to start to teach the kids a lesson.

From that day on, they never had a problem with either kid when they were on vacation.

Brilliant.

 

[Nienna]

I was spanked a few times by my mother only, my dad is a big guy and was afraid he would hurt me. But my mother was good for a swack when I ran out in the street or parking lots. Cured me of that bad habit in a jiffy

I was spanked on rare occasions by whichever parent was on hand to deal. My dad was also afraid of hurting us, so he did it in this super-controlled manner that we joke about today. He would send us to our room to "think about what we had done," then he would come in awhile later, make us bend over and grab our ankles, then Whack! He was afraid if he held us down, we would wiggle too much, and he would end up hitting us on the back instead of the backside. :spank3:

 

[misterblu]

It is a powertool that should be used only under specific circumstances, IMO. It's not the Duct Tape in the toolbox, it is more like the sautering iron, you just don't use it quite as often...

Yep. "Use the right tool for the job" works for a lot of things.

 

[no1tovote4]

Reminds me of a friend who had two kids. The kids were terrible travelers. They had planned a trip to DisneyWorld but knew the 6 hour drive ahead of them was going to be the pits. They loaded up the car and took off.

About an hour into the trip, the kids started screaming and fighting. Dad gave the usual "If you don't stop, we're turning around and going home speech." They kids stopped for about 10 minutes, then right back up again.

Dad turned the car around and went home. Kids cried and begged all the way home and the rest of the day - Promising to never do it again, etc. Dad held firm; said they weren't going to DW this year.

The next morning, Dad asked the kids if they wanted to try again. Of course they said yes and also promised to be perfect angels on the entire trip.

They took off and the entire vacation, trip there, DW, and the trip back was wonderful. Not a single word of arguing out of either kid.

What the kids didn't know was that Dad never made reservations for the first day. He KNEW there would be problems so he purposely left a day before vacation was suppose to start to teach the kids a lesson.

From that day on, they never had a problem with either kid when they were on vacation.

Brilliant.

This example reminds me of one of the "Deep Thoughts" - By Jack Handy...

Little kids like to be tricked...

It's like the other day I was taking my little nephew to Disney Land... Along the way I stopped by a burned down barn and said, "Oh No! Disneyland has burned down!" He cried and cried, but deep down I know he thought it was a pretty good joke. I started driving to the real Disneyland, but it was getting pretty late....

 

[Nienna]

Children are miniature human beings..They can be taught. Talked to. Reasoned with. Shown there are consequences to their actions that they won't like. Those consequences need not always involve hitting. Children also often follow the adults examples..

This is true to an extent. But there are times when a kid isn't only just unsure of what he's doing wrong; he is actively asking "who's gonna make me?" Kids make you prove your authority. It can be very reassuring to them to know conclusively that you are bigger, stronger, and willing to show them where the line is drawn. It can make them feel protected and safe, if it's done the right way.

 

[GotZoom]

This example reminds me of one of the "Deep Thoughts" - By Jack Handy...

Little kids like to be tricked...

It's like the other day I was taking my little nephew to Disney Land... Along the way I stopped by a burned down barn and said, "Oh No! Disneyland has burned down!" He cried and cried, but deep down I know he thought it was a pretty good joke. I started driving to the real Disneyland, but it was getting pretty late....

Or kind of like the women with _______ hair who was driving to Disneyworld.

She saw the sign on the side of the freeway that said:

DisneyWorld - Left

So she turned around and went home.

 

[Nienna]

if you are hitting your child to control their behaviour you have no fucking clue what it takes to motivate a human being to do what you want

It really depends on the kid... and on the "hitting." Some kids are "pleasers." They truly WANT the adults in their lives to be happy with them. Other kids like to push the envelope. In some situations, a kid will not be swayed by anything else. And of course it depends on how it is done. Flying at a kid in rage and whacking whever your hands/feet may land on their bodies is BEATING, not spanking, and there is no excuse for that.

 

[Nienna]

I'm against spanking, but the above isn't quite on target, at least for preschoolers. There isn't time for reasoning with a 4 year old, that just won't get that running into the street is a bad idea, same with playing on the railroad tracks.

Exactly, Kathianne. When children are small, they lack the ABILITY to reason. Just this morning, I had an incident with my 4 yo. He has a cold in his chest, and he asked for a cup of milk. I said, "I don't know... it might make you worse." He thought I said it might make him "burst," but he was still prepared to drink the cup of milk! :shocked:

 

[dilloduck]

This is true to an extent. But there are times when a kid isn't only just unsure of what he's doing wrong; he is actively asking "who's gonna make me?" Kids make you prove your authority. It can be very reassuring to them to know conclusively that you are bigger, stronger, and willing to show them where the line is drawn. It can make them feel protected and safe, if it's done the right way.

Exactly! It's my opinion that a couple of swats serve as an attention getter to be followed by a period of reasoning and explanation. My son learned very quickly that not listening to what I was telling him would result in an attention getting swat. He learned that I meant what I said after only 3 attention getters.

 

[dmp]

How come everyone today is too much of a pussy to smack their kids around? That's what I want to know: why are parents afraid to beat their kids? When I was a kid and I screwed up, my parents beat my ass. We didn't have a conversation about it. I didn't have a "time out." In fact, I've never even once been grounded in my life. What's the point? Send your kid to his room and make him play video games and read comic books all day? Great idea, why don't you take him to a psychiatrist while you're at it so she can pull some disorder out of her ass to hide the fact that you're a bad parent?

Kids today need a good beating every now and then. If you don't beat your kids when they fall out of line, the next thing you know your son will go off and bang some dude in the ass just out of spite. You tell them to clean their room, they say "no," you smack them. It's simple; it works. Don't listen to these assholes on TV with their bullshit hippy psycho babble; if they had it their way, every child would be raised in a pastel colored room with Philip Glass pumped through the speakers 24 hours a day. Then again, it might not be all that bad because it will make your kids complacent, so it won't be as hard for them to swallow when they realize that they'll be spending the rest of their lives chained to a desk in a cubicle writing reports to make someone else rich.

The problem is that kids today think their opinions matter. By not beating your kids, they get a skewed perspective of reality where they start thinking that they have it rough and that they can get away with dying their hair and listening to Insane Clown Posse. That's where you need to come in and put the law down. To help you, the negligent parent, I've put together a guide to smacking your kids for your convenience (hint: you may want to even print this guide up and hang it on your fridge as a reminder to both you and your kids). Here are some useful techniques:

Five across the eyes. This is a very basic maneuver and usually enough to cover most situations when your child is out of line. Simply put four fingers tightly together and either leave the thumb off to the side or fold it behind the other four fingers. Then smack your kid across the face with the back of your hand. Now this is the tricky part: make sure to snap your wrist just before contact otherwise you won't get a stinging effect. Very important because you don't want to risk letting your kid think you're a pussy.

The sucker punch. Just ask the question "hey, what's that on your shirt?" and when they look down, bust their lip. You need to do this every now and then to keep them guessing. Don't ever let them off the hook. Just because they're not doing anything wrong doesn't mean that they didn't do something wrong earlier that you weren't aware of.


The yard stick. Or for those of you who don't use the arbitrary American system, this is also known as "the meter stick." This is a good general purpose beating because the stick usually doesn't last beyond three or four good whacks--usually enough to send the message.


The one-two shut-the-hell-up. This is priceless when you're shopping and your kid won't shut the hell up: "I'm hungry, I want toys, I need my Insulin..." etc. First smack your kid (the 5 across the eyes technique works). Wait a few seconds for your kid to start crying, then smack your kid again to let him know that you mean business. This usually shuts them up because they see that the amount of crying is proportional to the amount of beatings.


The 2 x 4 / PVC pipe. If you do your job as a parent, this should never have to be administered. This is for heavy duty jobs only (ie. any time your kid comes home and begins a sentence with "she might be pregnant..." or "I can _____ if I want to..." where the blank can be any of the following: smoke, have sex, experiment with drugs, watch Oprah, etc). Usually the threat of this beating is enough to keep your kid from screwing up.


The Dragon Kick. If you're interested in a permanent solution to your child giving you lip about washing the dishes, cleaning his or her room or filing your tax return, then the Dragon kick might be the technique for you. I guarantee that you will only have to ask once after the Dragon kick has been administered.


The skull thump. A quick blow usually dealt to the side or back of the head. Simply flick them in the head with your finger. An alternative is to smack your child up side the head with your palm. Very useful for teaching your child to read when he or she makes a mistake. Hitting your child when he or she is learning builds confidence, or undermines confidence--I can't remember which.


The one-handed chauffeur reach around. A quick reach around while you're driving to smack your kid and his friends too if they disrespect. Swerve the car back and forth for the full effect.


The cane intercept. If you're too old to chase your kid around the house, use the handle of your cane to trip him if he tries to get away. When he gets up, poke him in the head a few times to let him know who's boss.

There you have it. Use these basic techniques to discipline your child if you want him or her to turn out to be a success story like me.

Remember: never take shit from your kids. You make payments on the house, utilities, their clothes, school, and their food. You own them. If they don't like it, they can move out. If you love your kids, love them enough to beat them so that they don't grow up to be idiots.



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