Spanking

[007]

 

[GotZoom]

Ohhhhhh....spanking kids.........

Never mind.

 

[007]

Ohhhhhh....spanking kids.........

Never mind.

Yeah... well... I was going to post it in the music thread for you and... your spanking partner...

 

[GotZoom]

Yeah... well... I was going to post it in the music thread for you and... your spanking partner...

LMFAO!

Good one!!

 

[fuzzykitten99]

its not so much that i don't believe in it per se...I just can't bring myself to hit Nathan no matter what he has done, other than maybe a light hand-slap for things he knows he is not supposed to touch. How is it that I teach him not to hit people (as is something he occasionally does when he's mad) and then I go and hit him? To me, I would think that would confuse him.

He understands me when I talk to him, and I know that you need to repeat yourself a lot with toddlers, so I am just patient and pick my battles. He is pretty well-behaved most of the time, although he is going through this spitting phase... Timeouts have been working ok so far. He knows when we say 'corner!', that he's in trouble, and we do tell him why.

 

[Said1]

I've never spanked my daughter, nor I have I wanted to spank her.

I don't necessarily disagree with spanking sometimes, it's just not for me.

 

[The ClayTaurus]

My dad never hit me, but he still knew how to instill a sense of fear in me that I've yet to have rivaled in my life.

 

[fuzzykitten99]

... but he still knew how to instill a sense of fear in me that I've yet to have rivaled in my life.

try this: become a parent

 

[Mr. P]

My dad never hit me, but he still knew how to instill a sense of fear in me that I've yet to have rivaled in my life.

I had two from my dad. Both with a belt, the first I was less than two years old, the second about 7. Now I'm an ole fart BUT remember them both.

 

[The ClayTaurus]

try this: become a parent

Yeah... I was at a festival in DC, in China Town this weekend.. this guy's 7 year old wandered away from him... rarely in my life have I witnessed something as sad as this man frantically yelling for his kid (who was found 10 minutes later, watching a performance)

Watching the fear grip him as time ticked by was hard; thankfully the crowd was nice and helped him find the kid.

 

[007]

I got my ass whooped by my dad quite a few times in my life, with a hickory stick. I used to fear and hate my dad for that.

Now, looking back on it, I know that every time I got it, I had screwed up. I was a little busy body. For example, I snuck over to the neighbors one day with an empty quart jar, tipped over their lawn mower and drained the gas out of it into the jar. Then took the gas down the hill behind our house to another neighbors club house that we were feuding with. Poured out the gas and torched their club house.

Did that warrant a spanking? I don't know. It did to my dad.

I never spanked my own son. Sometimes I wonder if that was a mistake.

At this point in my life, I harbor no ill feelings toward my dad. He was doing what had been done to him when he was a kid. He didn't know anything different.

 

[Nienna]

I think it depends 1) on the situation and 2) on the kid. I definitely don't think you should spank over every little thing, and some kids are just naturally more obedient and desiring of pleasing their parents. We only spank for 2 things: If a kid is blatently disrespectful and if a kid is disobedient. Depending on their age, we might give them more slack. An infant should NEVER be spanked, bc they don't have the capability of understanding the two things mentioned above. But if a child will not respect or obey you, how can you teach it anything else? And some kids have very hard heads. They are not deterred by other methods.

Fuzzy, my child psych professor told us the same thing in class, that you can't tell a child not to hit, and then spank it. I swallowed it hook, line, & sinker back then. But since I've had a few kids, I've come to realize that children think about things VERY differently than adults do. Ironically, it was information from the same professor that got me thinking about this.

Here's a link about Kohlberg. http://faculty.plts.edu/gpence/html/kohlberg.htm

He defined stages of morality that people go through. At the lowest levels, kids see authority as "whoever has the power to punish me." Young kids are incredibly egocentric. They don't think through "This is wrong, yet you are doing it to me." They think "I better not do this because I will get punished."

Even when a kid gets to later stages of morality, they should clearly be able to see the difference between a spanking from a parent and hitting. The spanking comes from an authority figure; hitting comes from a peer or a subordinate. A spanking is a teaching tool; hitting is a lashing out of emotion. If someone is yelling, screaming, and out of control, then he is not spanking; he is beating.

I think spanking can be a very useful and loving teaching tool in disciplining a child. It should be done infrequently, for certain predefined offences, between the ages of about 2-10. Once a kid hits puberty, they're probably too old to spank.

 

[manu1959]

i remebmer being spanked quite a few times....last timed he tried i was 16....a straight right hand put an end to my dad trying to spank me

 

[Dan]

I was never really spanked all that much, but I definitely knew/know kids that need to be spanked.

 

[Said1]

I think it depends on the entire home environment. Spanking a child once in awhile will more than like not create an aggressive violent child. On the other hand a child that is beaten often and living in a hostile violent environment might be more aggressive and prone to hit other children.

The excuses some parents will come up with to defend their childs violent behavior is almost funny though, if it wasn't so sad. I had one mother tell me once that her daughter trying to choke my cat was due to the fact that her grandfather used to do that.....before the kid was born. Never mind the fact that this women used to beat the crap out of her kids, animals and husband.

And PR, I would have kicked your ass too!

 

[archangel]

There is absolutely nothing wrong with spanking a child..."Spare the rod-spoil the child" this is a old but proven analogy...There is a big difference between spanking a butt and abuse...I was spanked as a child and spanked my kids and grandkids from time to time when needed...neither I nor the kids suffered a negative...as a matter of fact all are productive citizens and respect the law of the land...enough said!

 

[fuzzykitten99]

Yeah... I was at a festival in DC, in China Town this weekend.. this guy's 7 year old wandered away from him... rarely in my life have I witnessed something as sad as this man frantically yelling for his kid (who was found 10 minutes later, watching a performance)

Watching the fear grip him as time ticked by was hard; thankfully the crowd was nice and helped him find the kid.

i dunno how many times I have laughed and ridiculed parents who put one of those child leashes on their kids (i do still think it is kind of degrading), but being as I have a hard time chasing my son when he decides to run off (because he knows I can't run right now-figures), they don't look like a bad idea. I usually stick him in the cart anyway, if I am by myself, or I just have Tim come with me, or just leave Nathan home with Tim altogether. Nathan will usually stick by, help push the cart, and generally be good. Its just that little devil streak that hits at any given moment...

 

[Semper Fi]

My parents spanked me when I was younger, when I was being a fussy little guy and deserved it. I think that it's acceptable after other idas dont work, and it must be done with the hand. No paddles or belts or anything.

 

[Bonnie]

I think it depends on the entire home environment. Spanking a child once in awhile will more than like not create an aggressive violent child. On the other hand a child that is beaten often and living in a hostile violent environment might be more aggressive and prone to hit other children.

The excuses some parents will come up with to defend their childs violent behavior is almost funny though, if it wasn't so sad. I had one mother tell me once that her daughter trying to choke my cat was due to the fact that her grandfather used to do that.....before the kid was born. Never mind the fact that this women used to beat the crap out of her kids, animals and husband.

And PR, I would have kicked your ass too!

Well said girly

 

[manu1959]

if you are hitting your child to control their behaviour you have no fucking clue what it takes to motivate a human being to do what you want