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Rules For The Non Military


Senior Member
Nov 30, 2003
Reaction score
North Missisippi
I just got this by email from a very dear and very Democratic cousin. She believes it wholeheartedly and I support her in this. In advance, I apologise for the use by me of this forum for advancing an email (I know it irratates the hell out of me too), but this is a funny way of also advancing ideology with which I am about 99% in agreement. If you don't agree as well with at least most of this, well, I might have to kick your ass!!!!!!

Have Fun!!!!!!!!!

Rules for the Non Military

Dear Civilians, "We know that the current state of affairs in our great
nation has many civilians up in arms and excited to join the military. For those
of you who can't join, you can still lend a hand. Here are a few of the
areas where we would like your assistance:

1. The next time you see an adult talking (or wearing a hat) during the
playing of the National Anthem---kick their ass .

2. When you witness, firsthand, someone burning the American
Flag in protest---kick their ass.

3. Regardless of the rank they held while they served, pay the
highest amount of respect to all veterans. If you see anyone doing
otherwise, quietly pull them aside and explain how these veterans fought for the very freedom they bask in every second. Enlighten them on the many sacrifices these veterans made to make this Nation great. Then hold them down while a disabled veteran! kicks their ass.

4.(GUYS) If you were never in the military, DO NOT pretend
that you were. Wearing battle dress uniforms (BDUs) or Jungle Fatigues,
telling others that you used to be "Special Forces," and collecting GI Joe
memorabilia, might have been okay when you were seven years old. Now, it will only make you look stupid and get your ass kicked. !

5.Next time you come across an Air Force member, do not ask
them, "Do you fly a jet?" Not everyone in the Air Force is a pilot. Such
ignorance deserves an ass-kicking (children are exempt).

6.If you witness someone calling the US Coast Guard
'non-military', inform them of their mistake---and kick their ass.

7.Next time Old Glory (the US flag) prances by during a
parade, get on your damn feet and pay homage to her by placing your hand over your heart. Quietly thank the military member or veteran lucky enough to be carrying her---of course, failure to do either of those could earn you a severe ass-kicking.

8. Don't try to discuss politics with a military member or a
veteran. We are Americans, and we all bleed the same, regardless of our party affiliation. Our Chain of Command is to include our Commander-In-Chief
(CinC). The President (for those who didn't know) is our CinC regardless of
political party. We have no inside track on what happens inside those big
important buildings where all those representatives meet All we know is that when those civilian representatives screw up the situation, they call upon the
military to go straighten it out. If you keep asking us the same stupid
questions repeatedly, you will get your ass kicked!

9. 'Your mama wears combat boots' never made sense to
me---stop saying it! If she did, she would most likely be a vet and therefore, could kick your ass!

10. Bin Laden and the Taliban are not Communists, so stop saying
'Let's go kill those Commies!' And stop asking us where he is! Crystal balls
are not standard issue in the military. That reminds me---if you see anyone
calling those damn psychic phone numbers, let me know, so I can go
kick their ass!

11. 'Flyboy' (Air Force), 'Jarhead' (Marines), 'Grunt' (Army),
'Squid' (Navy), 'Puddle Jumpers' (Coast Guard), etc., are terms of endearment we use describing each other. Unless you are a service member or vet, you have not earned the right to use them. That could get your ass kicked. !

12. Last, but not least, whether or not you become a member of the
military, support our troops and their families. Every Thanksgiving and
religious holiday that you enjoy with family and friends, please remember that
there are literally thousands of soldiers, sailors, marines and airmen far from
home wishing they could be with their families. Thank God for our military
and the sacrifices they make every day. Without them, our country would get
it's ass kicked."

"It is the Veteran, not the reporter who has given us the freedom of the

"It is the Veteran, not the poet, who has given us the freedom of speech.

It is the Veteran, not the campus organizer, who gives us the freedom to

"It is the Military who salutes the flag, who serves beneath the flag, and
whose coffin is draped by the flag, who allows the protester to burn the

(Please pass this on so I won't have to kick your ass!) :) "If you can
read this, thank a teacher" If you are reading it in English, thank a Veteran "

I will add one more:
13. If you ever see anyone either standing for or singing the
national anthem in Spanish - KICK THEIR ASS.


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