I think some entities aren't intended for charity. While I much appreciate the warm smile, friendly greeting, good wishes from a teller at the bank, I don't go to the bank for for warm fuzzies or cordial interaction. And, except maybe in the Coffee Shop and a few other places, I don't come to USMB for that either.
But pleasant is very nice and like Elwood P. Dowd's philosophy:
"Years ago my mother used to say to me, she'd say, "In this world, Elwood, you must be" - she always called me Elwood - "In this world, Elwood, you must be oh so smart or oh so pleasant." Well, for years I was smart. I recommend pleasant. You may quote me."
Jesus was not personally abusive and he could be kind or comforting and quite pleasant. But he didn't mince words either and, while he could be very creative in getting it said, he said what he thought. But he put it into more general terms than targeting an individual for a personal insult:
“Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you tithe mint and dill and cummin, and have neglected the weightier provisions of the law: justice and mercy and faithfulness; but these are the things you should have done without neglecting the others."
To the rich young ruler's question:
"And again I say unto you, It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God."
I can think of no person ever who had his/her heart and mind changed by being called hateful names. All that accomplishes is contempt for the verbal abuser. Having said that, it is sport and entertainment for some here at USMB and probably not intended to inflict hurt or harm.
Still I think good people try take to heart the admonition to not bear false witness and to guard their words so as not to intentionally hurt another. That does not mean we should not say what we believe but we should state what actions/words we object to rather than libel/slander/verbally abuse another.
And I think smart Christians and/or good people do not automatically repeat gossip, libel, slander but take the time to check out the facts so as not to engage in that.
Having said that, we are all human and don't always live up to the ideal we want for ourselves.