I went to the Militaries version of AA and it was completely different, you are forced to share, answer questions and tell everyone every week why you went in, and if you refused you faced disciplinary action. Makes you want a drink afterwards.For those who are not sure what an alcoholic is...go to an AA meeting. They don't ask questions. They don't expect strangers there to "share". They just move around the table and everyone has their say..however long it may be. Or they don't say anything except "pass". And listen. Watch. Digest. You can pick out the ones still struggling and the ones that have done well....and the ones that never were alcoholics but NEED the label so they feel they belong somewhere (munchausen by proxy).
It's not about self control. It's EASY for a nonalcoholic to stop at one or two drinks. It doesn't take a lot of self control. Because they're not ADDICTED to alcohol.An alcoholic is a person who doesn't know the meaning of self control. They say it's the first drink that gets you in trouble not the second, third or fourth but i don't think that's true. Self control is a big part of life that us human beings need to learn.
Any alcoholic in recovery will tell you, they are ALWAYS an alcoholic.
And no alcoholic wants to be an alcoholic. Yet at the same time, they are the only ones who can affect a *cure*.
I certainly spent a lot of time drinking, hard, when I was younger. But you know there came a point when it just wasn't fun anymore, and when that happened, I quit. So now I wonder, was I an alcoholic, or was I just in a stage where I made it a part of my life? I mean, if you're an alcoholic, you're one forever, right? I spent 20 years of my life thinking the most fun thing in the world was to go to parties, hit the bars, etc...and consume copious amounts of liquor...I do mean copious.
I have no desire to pick up that lifestyle again, and I'm not concerned about it at all. I don't want to drink at all for the most part...when I do, I have a couple and I'm done. I'm not interested in going to bars, I don't want to go to parties...not because they're uncomfortable for me but because that's just not fun anymore, I have other things to do. Now I view them as a waste of time..there was a time when they were a goal!
So who the hell knows. I don't miss it, think I was silly to ever think it was fun, but I feel that way about a lot of the pursuits of my younger days.
It is a fact that many who start AA drop out. In fact most. Statistically the success rate of in house or outpatients treatment programs is pretty grim. As you illustrated, the alcoholic manages drinking through a clever web of deception, lies, manipulation, and pretense--whatever it takes to give him/her access and ability to alcohol. And yes, the alcoholic will have one drink or a half drink just to PROVE to others (or sometimes himself) that he is okay; he doesn't have problem; he can stop anytime he wants to. But he is already planning how he will get his next drink. He thinks about that next drink a lot even when he is not drinking. He arranges his life to make that next drink more accessibleIt's not about self control. It's EASY for a nonalcoholic to stop at one or two drinks. It doesn't take a lot of self control. Because they're not ADDICTED to alcohol.An alcoholic is a person who doesn't know the meaning of self control. They say it's the first drink that gets you in trouble not the second, third or fourth but i don't think that's true. Self control is a big part of life that us human beings need to learn.
That's another sign of an alcoholic...if you have to struggle to keep from drinking too much, you're probably an alcoholic. Nonalcoholics can take it or leave it. No big self-control needed.