Coming Out as a ***

[Dhara]

Zack's original point got lost here. Why wouldn't a gay guy protect all that is dear to him and just suppress his "urges"? Human nature is such that we just do not have that capacity to do that over a whole life time. Denying a part of you like that is a huge struggle. I know.

I know because my brother fought it for years and years. He married his partner late last year. Took years to find a church that let him be religious and gay. Took years to feel the family was accepting enough for him to continue down the path. Took years to feel he could defend his choices to others. From the outside it looked like he had to choose living gay or death.

I have no problem with civil unions, I still do not feel marriage is an option, but I do not make the rules, so it is my brother and God on that one. I felt bad, not being more accepting, but see my BIL's family is even less accepting, so at least we make a good effort.

My father was a closeted gay man. He married my mother and fathered two children with her knowing he was gay. He became addicted to anonymous sex with men in public places. Being in the closet contributed to his mental health problems and alcoholism. Sadly, he committed suicide.

I promised myself I would live openly partly because of watching my father self-destruct.

 

[mdk]

This thread...

 

[Bonzi]

I think you can repress yourself.
But probably not without the help of drugs to keep your sanity (anti depressants, anxiety medication etc.)

Which isn't good, either way
People are who they are. They should just accept it and move on.
Granted, that is easy for me to say because I don't have any terribly embarrassing characteristics. But life isn't easy..

Some people are happy to make sacrifices.
Think parenting....

 

[saveliberty]

I was a city councilperson in a small city for six years. What does that have to do with this conversation? Well, I made a lot of big decisions in that six years and every time one was made people were happy and others angry over the outcome. There are going to be aspects of your life people do not like. That doesn't mean you can't be friends on the parts you do share and agree with.

 

[Bonzi]

This thread...

Show your husband... what would he think?

 

[aaronleland]

I don't have any terribly embarrassing characteristics.

Aside from a small dick.

 

[TNHarley]

Its weird how being gay is such a rarity, yet so many people from one family can be that way.
My aunt and uncle are mental. They have 3 kids. One is a tranny, one is gay and one is high up in the military. Weird.
Of course, I don't think every gay person was born that way..

 

[Bonzi]

I don't have any terribly embarrassing characteristics.

Aside from a small dick.

Funny how you know everyone's dick size Aaron........

 

[Bonzi]

is being gay rare?
where's the stats?

 

[mdk]

This thread...

Show your husband... what would he think?

He would wonder why a heterosexual male would spend so much time gassing on about a hypothetical coming out.

 

[Lucy Hamilton]

I don't have any terribly embarrassing characteristics.

Aside from a small dick.

So, right on cue you turn up to start trouble huh?

 

[saveliberty]

I don't have any terribly embarrassing characteristics.

Aside from a small dick.

Funny how you know everyone's dick size Aaron........

It is how he keeps himself from wanting to screw all the guys here.

 

[Dhara]

I don't have any terribly embarrassing characteristics.

Aside from a small dick.

Funny how you know everyone's dick size Aaron........

He gets around.....

 

[TNHarley]

is being gay rare?
where's the stats?

Around 4% of the population is gay. I am sure it is more than that. But not much. At least around here.

 

[Dhara]

I've heard 10% but that might not be accurate. Kinsey did studies and collected data. They've been making educated guesses about numbers ever since.

 

[mdk]

I don't think I would feel differently if I was a *** either. I'd keep that shit to myself and feel like I had a duty to do so. Even if I had to act on it I would feel a duty to protect my family. After all, I have no right to impose my views and lifestyle on anyone else. I'd keep the boy toys under wraps if I had any and just tell the family that they are neighbors or some shit. For me personally, I probably would not even act on a homo desire. I would just quietly bare that burden. Why? Because I love my family and I am not a selfish, drama queen, prick.

And you would be free to chose that path if you so wish. Coming out to your family doesn't make you selfish, dramatic, or a prick. Perhaps to you is does, but who gives a shit what you think? lol

 

[Dhara]

In August 2002 Gallup asked Americans, in an open-ended format, to estimate the percentage of American men and the percentage of American women who are homosexual. The average estimates were that 21% of men are gay and 22% of women are lesbians. In fact, roughly a quarter of the public thinks more than 25% of men and 25% of women are homosexual. It should be pointed out, too, that many Americans (at least one in six) could not give an estimate.

Male respondents tend to give lower estimates of both the male and female homosexual population than female respondents do. The average estimates among male respondents are that 16% of men and 21% of women are homosexual. Among female respondents, the average estimates are that 26% of men and 23% of women are homosexual. Somewhat interestingly, both sexes believe there are more homosexuals in the opposite sex than in their own sex.

Men with multiple biological elder brothers were more likely to be homosexual (about a 30 percent higher chance per brother) than those who merely grew up around a lot of older nonbiological male siblings. In fact, only the number of biological older brothers predicted homosexuality in men, regardless of their upbringing, which suggests that the triggering factor is prenatal.
Source(s):
http://www.gallup.com/poll/6961/What-Per...
http://www.popsci.com/article/2006-06/ol...

 

[Dhara]

The Williams Institute at the UCLA School of Law, a sexual orientation law and public policy think tank, estimates that 9 million (about 3.8%) of Americans identify as gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender (2011). The institute also found that bisexuals make up 1.8% of the population, while 1.7% are gay or lesbian. Transgender adults make up 0.3% of the population.

Why is this number an estimate?

The number of LGBT persons in the U.S. is subjective. Studies pointing to the statistics are estimates at best. The most widely accepted statistic is that 1 in ever 10 individuals is LGBT; however some research estimates 1 in 20. Of course, this all depends on one's definition of gay (which may vary by study) and the participants willingness to identify as gay, bi, lesbian or transgender. So, why can't the actual number of GLB people be counted? There are many things to consider when trying to count the number of GLBT persons.

What do the experts say?

When asked about GLB population statistics, Gary J. Gates, a Senior Research Fellow at The Williams Institute on Sexual Orientation Law and Public Policy, says:

"That's the single question that I'm asked the most. The answer is unfortunately not simple. I'll respond with a question. What do you mean when you use the word 'gay'? If you mean people who identify as gay, lesbian, or bisexual in a survey, then the answer is that it's likely not one in ten, but closer to one in twenty. A recent government survey found that 4 percent of adults aged 18-45 identified as 'homosexual' or 'bisexual.' A similar proportion of voters identify as GLB.
How Many Gay People Are There in the United States?

 

[saveliberty]

I think the numbers are overstated. Constant bombardment in the news, movies and message boards make it seem larger.

 

[Dhara]

I wouldn't say we're constantly bombarded about gays, we're bombarded about SEX, all kinds.