Blackrook
Diamond Member
- Jun 20, 2014
- 21,213
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I hereby declare, with all the authority vested in me by "white privilege", that June is to be known as White Male Appreciation Month.
So let's think of all the contributions made to society by white males.
No one knows for sure who invented the pizza, but it was probably a white male of Italian descent. It is possible that brown people who lived in ancient days ate food that looked somewhat like a pizza, but what brown people did before white people were around does not really concern us.
History of pizza - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
So pizza counts as a white male achievement because Italians are now considered white by those in charge of determining who is white, though in a previous century Italians were considered olive-skinned foreigners and not white at all. But retroactively, Italians have been grandfathered in so that Italians who were not white while they lived, are white now, and therefore the pizza they invented is a white male achievement, by retroactive application of the white label, which is done by the people in charge of figuring out who is white.
The Chinese invented the toothbrush, but they were first mass produced by a white male from England, and therefore count as a white male acheivement:
Toothbrush - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
And why is the toothbrush a white male achievement and not a Chinese achievement? Because things invented in ancient China but never mass produced and used to their full potential until white males knew about them count as white male achievements.
For example, gun powder is a white male achievement. While it is true that Chinese invented gunpowder, the Chinese used gunpowder for harmless fireworks for hundreds of years, and it never occurred to them it could be better utilized to kill people, sink ships, and knock stuff down. It took the ingenuity of a white male to figure that out, followed by the eagerness and enthusiasm of millions of white males who used gunpowder to kill each other, sink each other's ships, and knock each other's stuff down. The Chinese were clueless to this development until white males marched into their country and started killing them with gunpowder weapons, sinking their "junks" (that's Chinese for "ship") and knocking their ancient and obsolete stuff down.
Another white male achievement: the discovery of America. People from Asia walked over to the Americas over a land bridge between Russia and Alaska some 20,000 years ago, and became what are now called "Native Americans." But America wasn't "discovered" until 1492 when white male Christopher Columbus came here. So really, everything that happened in America before Columbus got here may be interesting to archaeologists, but it is not taught in "American history" since white males had nothing to do with it.
So let's think of all the contributions made to society by white males.
No one knows for sure who invented the pizza, but it was probably a white male of Italian descent. It is possible that brown people who lived in ancient days ate food that looked somewhat like a pizza, but what brown people did before white people were around does not really concern us.
History of pizza - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
So pizza counts as a white male achievement because Italians are now considered white by those in charge of determining who is white, though in a previous century Italians were considered olive-skinned foreigners and not white at all. But retroactively, Italians have been grandfathered in so that Italians who were not white while they lived, are white now, and therefore the pizza they invented is a white male achievement, by retroactive application of the white label, which is done by the people in charge of figuring out who is white.
The Chinese invented the toothbrush, but they were first mass produced by a white male from England, and therefore count as a white male acheivement:
Toothbrush - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
And why is the toothbrush a white male achievement and not a Chinese achievement? Because things invented in ancient China but never mass produced and used to their full potential until white males knew about them count as white male achievements.
For example, gun powder is a white male achievement. While it is true that Chinese invented gunpowder, the Chinese used gunpowder for harmless fireworks for hundreds of years, and it never occurred to them it could be better utilized to kill people, sink ships, and knock stuff down. It took the ingenuity of a white male to figure that out, followed by the eagerness and enthusiasm of millions of white males who used gunpowder to kill each other, sink each other's ships, and knock each other's stuff down. The Chinese were clueless to this development until white males marched into their country and started killing them with gunpowder weapons, sinking their "junks" (that's Chinese for "ship") and knocking their ancient and obsolete stuff down.
Another white male achievement: the discovery of America. People from Asia walked over to the Americas over a land bridge between Russia and Alaska some 20,000 years ago, and became what are now called "Native Americans." But America wasn't "discovered" until 1492 when white male Christopher Columbus came here. So really, everything that happened in America before Columbus got here may be interesting to archaeologists, but it is not taught in "American history" since white males had nothing to do with it.
