The science of spanking

[Luddly Neddite]

The Science Of Spanking What Happens To Spanked Kids When They Grow Up

This is well worth a good long look.

Nothing good comes from hitting children.

 

[Luddly Neddite]

Sorry about the typos in the subject line.

 

[peach174]

The very first one about spare the rod spoil the child comes from the Bible in proverbs not a poem.

There are 76 million baby boomers and most if not all were spanked at some time or other. It was used sparingly (yes there was and still is some abuse of it) and our parents used common sense when it was applied. We were also taught how to use common sense.
Use of that discipline taught us respect for our parents and respect for those in authority like our police and teachers.
It gave us
Values

• Individual choice
• Community involvement
• Prosperity
• Ownership
• Self-actualizing
• Health and wellness

Attributes

• Adaptive
• Goal-oriented
• Focus on individual choices and freedom
• Adaptive to a diverse workplace
• Positive attitude

Work styles

• Confidence in tasks
• Emphasize team-building
• Seek collaborative, group decision making
• Avoid conflict

 

[Derideo_Te]

A full grown adult beating a small child is abuse.

The use of CP is a substitute for being a good parent in my opinion.

Reasoning with children as well as other legitimate non-CP works far better.

Yes, there are parents who are clueless and don't know any better but that is just all the more reason why this is something that should be taught in schools.

And it is complete and utter nonsense that you can beat values and a work ethic into a child.

The only thing any child ever learned from being beaten was that bigger means stronger and therefore has the "right" to inflict pain on the smaller and weaker person.

 

[Agit8r]

Just goes to show how unenlightened red states are.

"The usual lazy and short way by chastisement and the rod, which is the only instrument of government that tutors generally know, or ever think of, is the most unfit of any to be us’d in education... Such a sort of slavish discipline makes a slavish temper. The child submits, and dissembles obedience, whilst the fear of the rod hangs over him; but when that is remov’d, and by being out of sight, he can promise himself impunity, he gives the greater scope to his natural inclination; which by this way is not at all alter’d, but, on the contrary, heighten’d and increas’d in him; and after such restraint, breaks out usually with the more violence"
-- John Locke; from 'Some Thoughts Concerning Education' (1693)

 

[peach174]

A full grown adult beating a small child is abuse.

The use of CP is a substitute for being a good parent in my opinion.

Reasoning with children as well as other legitimate non-CP works far better.

Yes, there are parents who are clueless and don't know any better but that is just all the more reason why this is something that should be taught in schools.

And it is complete and utter nonsense that you can beat values and a work ethic into a child.

The only thing any child ever learned from being beaten was that bigger means stronger and therefore has the "right" to inflict pain on the smaller and weaker person.

Beating is child abuse.
Spanking is not.

 

[Derideo_Te]

A full grown adult beating a small child is abuse.

The use of CP is a substitute for being a good parent in my opinion.

Reasoning with children as well as other legitimate non-CP works far better.

Yes, there are parents who are clueless and don't know any better but that is just all the more reason why this is something that should be taught in schools.

And it is complete and utter nonsense that you can beat values and a work ethic into a child.

The only thing any child ever learned from being beaten was that bigger means stronger and therefore has the "right" to inflict pain on the smaller and weaker person.

Beating is child abuse.
Spanking is not.

From the child's POV there is no difference between the two.

 

[peach174]

Kids with good behavior
More than likely was spanked sparingly and disciplined when they were 1 1/2 up to 3 years of age and parents who act responsibly



Kid that have never been spanked nor disciplined and more than likely learned this bad behavior from the parents themselves, by not acting responsibly around the kids.



Kids learn and mimic behavior that they see around them at home.

 

[Derideo_Te]

Kids with good behavior
More than likely was spanked sparingly and disciplined when they were 1 1/2 up to 3 years of age and parents who act responsibly



Kid that have never been spanked nor disciplined and more than likely learned this bad behavior from the parents themselves, by not acting responsibly around the kids.



Kids learn and mimic behavior that they see around them at home.

If you are correct then the kids who were doing the bullying learned and mimiced that from their parents who beat them.

 

[peach174]

A full grown adult beating a small child is abuse.

The use of CP is a substitute for being a good parent in my opinion.

Reasoning with children as well as other legitimate non-CP works far better.

Yes, there are parents who are clueless and don't know any better but that is just all the more reason why this is something that should be taught in schools.

And it is complete and utter nonsense that you can beat values and a work ethic into a child.

The only thing any child ever learned from being beaten was that bigger means stronger and therefore has the "right" to inflict pain on the smaller and weaker person.

Beating is child abuse.
Spanking is not.

From the child's POV there is no difference between the two.

If done correctly they know by the time they are 3 or 4.

 

[peach174]

Kids with good behavior
More than likely was spanked sparingly and disciplined when they were 1 1/2 up to 3 years of age and parents who act responsibly



Kid that have never been spanked nor disciplined and more than likely learned this bad behavior from the parents themselves, by not acting responsibly around the kids.



Kids learn and mimic behavior that they see around them at home.

If you are correct then the kids who were doing the bullying learned and mimiced that from their parents who beat them.

Beating yes maybe, but more than likely they saw one or the other parent doing it . If a father bullies the wife or wife bullies the husband or they bully their friends and or neighbors.

 

[westwall]

A full grown adult beating a small child is abuse.

The use of CP is a substitute for being a good parent in my opinion.

Reasoning with children as well as other legitimate non-CP works far better.

Yes, there are parents who are clueless and don't know any better but that is just all the more reason why this is something that should be taught in schools.

And it is complete and utter nonsense that you can beat values and a work ethic into a child.

The only thing any child ever learned from being beaten was that bigger means stronger and therefore has the "right" to inflict pain on the smaller and weaker person.

Beating is child abuse.
Spanking is not.

From the child's POV there is no difference between the two.

I disagree completely. I have only ever had to swat my daughter one time, and that was after she had run into a street without looking. She was two and a half and had run into the street after I told her to look first. She wasn't paying attention to me as I was explaining why what she had done was dangerous. I swatted her on the bottom one time to get her attention.

That was enough. We have never had to resort to a swat ever since. Now she KNOWS when we are speaking to her it is important she pay attention. She is the best student in her class by far, and as a third grader is reading at a twelfth grade level. I absolutely hated swatting her, but I also knew that it was the only thing that would get her attention, and it was vitally important she learn that lesson immediately.

 

[westwall]

Kids with good behavior
More than likely was spanked sparingly and disciplined when they were 1 1/2 up to 3 years of age and parents who act responsibly



Kid that have never been spanked nor disciplined and more than likely learned this bad behavior from the parents themselves, by not acting responsibly around the kids.



Kids learn and mimic behavior that they see around them at home.

If you are correct then the kids who were doing the bullying learned and mimiced that from their parents who beat them.

"Modeling" is indeed the dominant way that kids learn. Unfortunately they can model from TV shows, and if parents aren't careful with what their little ones watch, that is how they get bad habits and behaviors.

 

[Derideo_Te]

A full grown adult beating a small child is abuse.

The use of CP is a substitute for being a good parent in my opinion.

Reasoning with children as well as other legitimate non-CP works far better.

Yes, there are parents who are clueless and don't know any better but that is just all the more reason why this is something that should be taught in schools.

And it is complete and utter nonsense that you can beat values and a work ethic into a child.

The only thing any child ever learned from being beaten was that bigger means stronger and therefore has the "right" to inflict pain on the smaller and weaker person.

Beating is child abuse.
Spanking is not.

From the child's POV there is no difference between the two.

If done correctly they know by the time they are 3 or 4.

Beating under the age of 4 is like beating a pet. They have absolutely no idea why they are being hurt.

 

[Derideo_Te]

Kids with good behavior
More than likely was spanked sparingly and disciplined when they were 1 1/2 up to 3 years of age and parents who act responsibly



Kid that have never been spanked nor disciplined and more than likely learned this bad behavior from the parents themselves, by not acting responsibly around the kids.



Kids learn and mimic behavior that they see around them at home.

If you are correct then the kids who were doing the bullying learned and mimiced that from their parents who beat them.

Beating yes maybe, but more than likely they saw one or the other parent doing it . If a father bullies the wife or wife bullies the husband or they bully their friends and or neighbors.

If their parent beats them they will take out their anger and resentment on smaller kids. Parents beating their kids is one of the prime causes of bullying.

 

[Derideo_Te]

A full grown adult beating a small child is abuse.

The use of CP is a substitute for being a good parent in my opinion.

Reasoning with children as well as other legitimate non-CP works far better.

Yes, there are parents who are clueless and don't know any better but that is just all the more reason why this is something that should be taught in schools.

And it is complete and utter nonsense that you can beat values and a work ethic into a child.

The only thing any child ever learned from being beaten was that bigger means stronger and therefore has the "right" to inflict pain on the smaller and weaker person.

Beating is child abuse.
Spanking is not.

From the child's POV there is no difference between the two.

I disagree completely. I have only ever had to swat my daughter one time, and that was after she had run into a street without looking. She was two and a half and had run into the street after I told her to look first. She wasn't paying attention to me as I was explaining why what she had done was dangerous. I swatted her on the bottom one time to get her attention.

That was enough. We have never had to resort to a swat ever since. Now she KNOWS when we are speaking to her it is important she pay attention. She is the best student in her class by far, and as a third grader is reading at a twelfth grade level. I absolutely hated swatting her, but I also knew that it was the only thing that would get her attention, and it was vitally important she learn that lesson immediately.

At least you did not beat her habitually.

 

[Derideo_Te]

Kids with good behavior
More than likely was spanked sparingly and disciplined when they were 1 1/2 up to 3 years of age and parents who act responsibly



Kid that have never been spanked nor disciplined and more than likely learned this bad behavior from the parents themselves, by not acting responsibly around the kids.



Kids learn and mimic behavior that they see around them at home.

If you are correct then the kids who were doing the bullying learned and mimiced that from their parents who beat them.

"Modeling" is indeed the dominant way that kids learn. Unfortunately they can model from TV shows, and if parents aren't careful with what their little ones watch, that is how they get bad habits and behaviors.

The meme that TV makes children violent has been debunked over and over again. You probably saw the war scenes from Vietnam growing up as did millions of other children and it had no impact on your behavior whatsoever.

 

[westwall]

A full grown adult beating a small child is abuse.

The use of CP is a substitute for being a good parent in my opinion.

Reasoning with children as well as other legitimate non-CP works far better.

Yes, there are parents who are clueless and don't know any better but that is just all the more reason why this is something that should be taught in schools.

And it is complete and utter nonsense that you can beat values and a work ethic into a child.

The only thing any child ever learned from being beaten was that bigger means stronger and therefore has the "right" to inflict pain on the smaller and weaker person.

Beating is child abuse.
Spanking is not.

From the child's POV there is no difference between the two.

If done correctly they know by the time they are 3 or 4.

Beating under the age of 4 is like beating a pet. They have absolutely no idea why they are being hurt.

There is a HUGE difference between a swat, and a beating. Hyperbole is not your friend here.

 

[westwall]

Kids with good behavior
More than likely was spanked sparingly and disciplined when they were 1 1/2 up to 3 years of age and parents who act responsibly



Kid that have never been spanked nor disciplined and more than likely learned this bad behavior from the parents themselves, by not acting responsibly around the kids.



Kids learn and mimic behavior that they see around them at home.

If you are correct then the kids who were doing the bullying learned and mimiced that from their parents who beat them.

"Modeling" is indeed the dominant way that kids learn. Unfortunately they can model from TV shows, and if parents aren't careful with what their little ones watch, that is how they get bad habits and behaviors.

The meme that TV makes children violent has been debunked over and over again. You probably saw the war scenes from Vietnam growing up as did millions of other children and it had no impact on your behavior whatsoever.

You must have stopped reading the studies in the 1970's then. You are clearly far, far behind the experts in the field.


"Virtually since the dawn of television, parents, teachers, legislators and mental health professionals have wanted to understand the impact of television programs, particularly on children. Of special concern has been the portrayal of violence, particularly given psychologist Albert Bandura's work in the 1970s on social learning and the tendency of children to imitate what they see. As a result of 15 years of “consistently disturbing” findings about the violent content of children's programs, the Surgeon General's Scientific Advisory Committee on Television and Social Behavior was formed in 1969 to assess the impact of violence on the attitudes, values and behavior of viewers. The resulting report and a follow-up report in 1982 by the National Institute of Mental Health identified these major effects of seeing violence on television:"

• Children may become less sensitive to the pain and suffering of others.
• Children may be more fearful of the world around them.
• Children may be more likely to behave in aggressive or harmful ways toward others.

Violence in the Media Psychologists Study TV and Video Game Violence for Potential Harmful Effects

 

[iamwhatiseem]

I spanked both of our children until they got to be around 5 or 6 years old.
Spanking at a young age is not only effective, but very necessary especially when deterring a child from doing something that is a danger to themselves.
A young child cannot reason, they have a very small vocabulary and are totally incapable of higher thinking.

Sitting down with a 2 years old and trying to teach them why electricity will kill them is not only dumb - but you are endangering the child recklessly.
Fear is mankind’s greatest deterrent for everything. Using fear to deter small children is being a good parent. Not using it, is reckless and just plain dumb.
I stopped spanking when they grew up a little and was old enough to understand reasoning and understand consequential discipline.
By the way, my children are grown now.
The oldest graduated with a Medical Degree from a major university on the Dean's list.
The second, is pursuing a Medical Degree and is doing very well.