- Sep 22, 2013
- 4,956
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Here's a commerce-parody tale I cooked up symbolic of TrumpUSA and inspired by the culture-dystopia film Mars Attacks!
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Donald Trump was running America as its President satisfactorily (as multiple people claimed). However, from a parallel universe, the twin-version of Trump (named 'Super-Trump') watched (from this crystal ball) the developing ethics problems and consumerism-convenience 'gluttonies' of the ebay-obsessed and Facebook-hysteria that defined 'TrumpUSA' on Earth and threatened to create another rendition of Reaganomics (the unwise economics politics of America's previous 'celebrity-prez'). Super-Trump decided to visit Earth.
When Super-Trump arrived on Earth, he noticed that Americans were generally happy with Burger King, Home Depot, and the NBA Finals but were complacent when it came to political ethics (e.g., Clinton-Lewinsky) and capitalism-based scandals (e.g., Enron). Super-Trump realized that the cherished NFL football team the Oakland Raiders were moving to the casino-city of Las Vegas(!), and this development came at the heels of the election of Donald Trump (former owner of Trump Taj Mahal casino in Atlantic City) as U.S. President.
Super-Trump decided to investigate this Vegas-Raiders news and then wrote a memo to the White House: "Mr. President, I'm an alien and your twin from a parallel universe. My name is Super-Trump. I must talk with you about the Vegas-Raiders decision, as it reflects extreme consumerism-based changes in American culture and philosophy (and arguably ethics!)." President Trump decided to meet with Super-Trump at the White House (in a secret meeting in the Oval Office).
President Trump greeted Super-Trump with all humility and interest, thinking at first he was simply a concerned patriotic American citizen interested in consumerism debates and commerce-based ethics dialogue. The President told his 'parallel-universe twin,' "It pleases me to welcome you to the White House, since I want Americans to feel they need not resort to public acts of hysterical defiance to get my attention and have my interests peaked regarding modern-age problems. However, I need to ask you why you insist you're my 'twin!" When President Trump went to shake Super-Trump's hands (as a gesture of cordiality), he realized Super-Trump had no hands!!
Super-Trump explained to the President that he was indeed an alien and even though he took on the appearance of a human being, his species of aliens were evolved without any hands (since they did all hand-relevant acts/deeds/work with their feet/toes, arms, and head). President Trump asked 'Super-Trump' what he thought the evolutionary advantage of having no hands was and if/how it was related to consumerism-critique sensitivity, and the alien told the President (in good cheer before departing Earth!), "I have no hands, since it is apparently dangerous to touch a universe governed by fortune-hunters..."
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Donald Trump was running America as its President satisfactorily (as multiple people claimed). However, from a parallel universe, the twin-version of Trump (named 'Super-Trump') watched (from this crystal ball) the developing ethics problems and consumerism-convenience 'gluttonies' of the ebay-obsessed and Facebook-hysteria that defined 'TrumpUSA' on Earth and threatened to create another rendition of Reaganomics (the unwise economics politics of America's previous 'celebrity-prez'). Super-Trump decided to visit Earth.
When Super-Trump arrived on Earth, he noticed that Americans were generally happy with Burger King, Home Depot, and the NBA Finals but were complacent when it came to political ethics (e.g., Clinton-Lewinsky) and capitalism-based scandals (e.g., Enron). Super-Trump realized that the cherished NFL football team the Oakland Raiders were moving to the casino-city of Las Vegas(!), and this development came at the heels of the election of Donald Trump (former owner of Trump Taj Mahal casino in Atlantic City) as U.S. President.
Super-Trump decided to investigate this Vegas-Raiders news and then wrote a memo to the White House: "Mr. President, I'm an alien and your twin from a parallel universe. My name is Super-Trump. I must talk with you about the Vegas-Raiders decision, as it reflects extreme consumerism-based changes in American culture and philosophy (and arguably ethics!)." President Trump decided to meet with Super-Trump at the White House (in a secret meeting in the Oval Office).
President Trump greeted Super-Trump with all humility and interest, thinking at first he was simply a concerned patriotic American citizen interested in consumerism debates and commerce-based ethics dialogue. The President told his 'parallel-universe twin,' "It pleases me to welcome you to the White House, since I want Americans to feel they need not resort to public acts of hysterical defiance to get my attention and have my interests peaked regarding modern-age problems. However, I need to ask you why you insist you're my 'twin!" When President Trump went to shake Super-Trump's hands (as a gesture of cordiality), he realized Super-Trump had no hands!!
Super-Trump explained to the President that he was indeed an alien and even though he took on the appearance of a human being, his species of aliens were evolved without any hands (since they did all hand-relevant acts/deeds/work with their feet/toes, arms, and head). President Trump asked 'Super-Trump' what he thought the evolutionary advantage of having no hands was and if/how it was related to consumerism-critique sensitivity, and the alien told the President (in good cheer before departing Earth!), "I have no hands, since it is apparently dangerous to touch a universe governed by fortune-hunters..."
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