CDZ Men and Women (Differences)

What is genetic about behavior? Behavior is learned not inherited.
Actually there is learned and unlearned behavior. In lower animals there are many examples. In humans it's been difficult to isolated learned from unlearned behavior. A human child is drawn to a parent or surrogate parent for warmth an substance. This is unlearned behavior.

Sure, but there is no doubt there are differences in our chemistry makeup and that accounts for a lot of things. In men, testosterone levels are going to be higher (in normal circumstances). Because of this, men/boys are going to tend to be more aggressive and drawn to more aggressive type of activities, like sports. Women have higher amounts of estrogen which makes us more likely to exhibit more nurturing and more gentle behavior. Our differences serve a purpose. They are not just social constructs. They are also instinctual. We just happen to live in a society where gender roles are not as important as they once were, but we still have those instincts and things we are naturally normally drawn to, and that won't change.
I agree, there are certainly biological and chemical differences such as testosterone and estrogen that effects our behavior. However, the degree of those difference varies greatly from one person to another.

For researchers, it's difficult to determine how much of our behavior is determined by nature versus nurture. Unlike lab animals, we can't isolate humans and control the variables. Thus, so much of the research is far from being conclusive.

Here is the case I was talking about. I saw a documentary about this case.

Woman who killed sister found dead in cell
It's amazing how many violent acts such as this could have been prevented if the perpetrator had just taken their meds.

They always seem to take it upon themselves to stop their medications, not realizing that some medications should be weaned off and that they should be under a doctor's supervision in order to try something else in the case of side effects.
 
Sometimes it is really subtle things that are tell tale about the inate differences. Watching my son and daughter and also my nieces and nephews and great nieces and nephews play with toy cars. . .without exception all the little boys made motor noises playing with those cars, and without exception not one of the little girls made motor noises playing with those cars. That is not learned behavior. It is just something hardwired into the circuitry. Important? Not at all. But it should inform us that God made men and women as different beings.

And probably the men were given the greater size, strength, speed, etc. because they would naturally be the hunters, gatherers, providers, protectors. And the women were given their own special kinds of stamina and abilities because they would bear the children and be the primary nurturers of those children and their community as well as making a home and being the heart of it. Does that mean men cannot be nurturers and/or homemakers or that women cannot be providers? Of course not. But there is a kind of natural rhythm in it all and I think we try to alter it at our peril.
I don't think a conclusion that little boys make motor noises playing with cars and little girls don't is unlearned behavior unless you are sure that these kids don't watch kid TV programs, read books, or play with other kids who exhibit this behavior. Kid's minds are like sponges, they soak up everything, far more than we know.
 
Sometimes it is really subtle things that are tell tale about the inate differences. Watching my son and daughter and also my nieces and nephews and great nieces and nephews play with toy cars. . .without exception all the little boys made motor noises playing with those cars, and without exception not one of the little girls made motor noises playing with those cars. That is not learned behavior. It is just something hardwired into the circuitry. Important? Not at all. But it should inform us that God made men and women as different beings.

And probably the men were given the greater size, strength, speed, etc. because they would naturally be the hunters, gatherers, providers, protectors. And the women were given their own special kinds of stamina and abilities because they would bear the children and be the primary nurturers of those children and their community as well as making a home and being the heart of it. Does that mean men cannot be nurturers and/or homemakers or that women cannot be providers? Of course not. But there is a kind of natural rhythm in it all and I think we try to alter it at our peril.
I don't think a conclusion that little boys make motor noises playing with cars and little girls don't is unlearned behavior unless you are sure that these kids don't watch kid TV programs, read books, or play with other kids who exhibit this behavior. Kid's minds are like sponges, they soak up everything, far more than we know.

Well, we should just let our children act naturally. I'd be willing to bet that more times than not, the boys will naturally gravitate to the more loud and physical things while the girls will gravitate to more quiet detail-oriented activities.
 
Sometimes it is really subtle things that are tell tale about the inate differences. Watching my son and daughter and also my nieces and nephews and great nieces and nephews play with toy cars. . .without exception all the little boys made motor noises playing with those cars, and without exception not one of the little girls made motor noises playing with those cars. That is not learned behavior. It is just something hardwired into the circuitry. Important? Not at all. But it should inform us that God made men and women as different beings.

And probably the men were given the greater size, strength, speed, etc. because they would naturally be the hunters, gatherers, providers, protectors. And the women were given their own special kinds of stamina and abilities because they would bear the children and be the primary nurturers of those children and their community as well as making a home and being the heart of it. Does that mean men cannot be nurturers and/or homemakers or that women cannot be providers? Of course not. But there is a kind of natural rhythm in it all and I think we try to alter it at our peril.
I don't think a conclusion that little boys make motor noises playing with cars and little girls don't is unlearned behavior unless you are sure that these kids don't watch kid TV programs, read books, or play with other kids who exhibit this behavior. Kid's minds are like sponges, they soak up everything, far more than we know.

Well I sure don't intend to get into a debate over it. It is a personal observation that I am reasonably certain has nothing to do with learned behavior. When you have little boys and girls playing with toy cars together--the boys do it, and the girls don't--you have to figure there is some dynamic at work separate from learned behavior.

And I can appreciate that you don't agree with that and that's cool.
 
Actually there is learned and unlearned behavior. In lower animals there are many examples. In humans it's been difficult to isolated learned from unlearned behavior. A human child is drawn to a parent or surrogate parent for warmth an substance. This is unlearned behavior.

Sure, but there is no doubt there are differences in our chemistry makeup and that accounts for a lot of things. In men, testosterone levels are going to be higher (in normal circumstances). Because of this, men/boys are going to tend to be more aggressive and drawn to more aggressive type of activities, like sports. Women have higher amounts of estrogen which makes us more likely to exhibit more nurturing and more gentle behavior. Our differences serve a purpose. They are not just social constructs. They are also instinctual. We just happen to live in a society where gender roles are not as important as they once were, but we still have those instincts and things we are naturally normally drawn to, and that won't change.
I agree, there are certainly biological and chemical differences such as testosterone and estrogen that effects our behavior. However, the degree of those difference varies greatly from one person to another.

For researchers, it's difficult to determine how much of our behavior is determined by nature versus nurture. Unlike lab animals, we can't isolate humans and control the variables. Thus, so much of the research is far from being conclusive.

Here is the case I was talking about. I saw a documentary about this case.

Woman who killed sister found dead in cell
It's amazing how many violent acts such as this could have been prevented if the perpetrator had just taken their meds.

They always seem to take it upon themselves to stop their medications, not realizing that some medications should be weaned off and that they should be under a doctor's supervision in order to try something else in the case of side effects.
Medications that alter behavior are just like other medications, they have side effects. Those side effects also alter behavior patterns other than those targeted. This plus physical side effects often make the medication seem almost intolerable for some patient. My younger brother was on such medications for years. They certainly improved his behavior but often he said his life was like being half dead all the time.
 
Sometimes it is really subtle things that are tell tale about the inate differences. Watching my son and daughter and also my nieces and nephews and great nieces and nephews play with toy cars. . .without exception all the little boys made motor noises playing with those cars, and without exception not one of the little girls made motor noises playing with those cars. That is not learned behavior. It is just something hardwired into the circuitry. Important? Not at all. But it should inform us that God made men and women as different beings.

And probably the men were given the greater size, strength, speed, etc. because they would naturally be the hunters, gatherers, providers, protectors. And the women were given their own special kinds of stamina and abilities because they would bear the children and be the primary nurturers of those children and their community as well as making a home and being the heart of it. Does that mean men cannot be nurturers and/or homemakers or that women cannot be providers? Of course not. But there is a kind of natural rhythm in it all and I think we try to alter it at our peril.
I don't think a conclusion that little boys make motor noises playing with cars and little girls don't is unlearned behavior unless you are sure that these kids don't watch kid TV programs, read books, or play with other kids who exhibit this behavior. Kid's minds are like sponges, they soak up everything, far more than we know.

Well, we should just let our children act naturally. I'd be willing to bet that more times than not, the boys will naturally gravitate to the more loud and physical things while the girls will gravitate to more quiet detail-oriented activities.

I think you're right about that. Watching groups of little boys and girls play together, they do share in certain activities. But while there will always be exceptions, boys by themselves will almost always create a different dynamic than girls do by themselves. And I just can't accept that it is all due to learned behavior.
 
Sometimes it is really subtle things that are tell tale about the inate differences. Watching my son and daughter and also my nieces and nephews and great nieces and nephews play with toy cars. . .without exception all the little boys made motor noises playing with those cars, and without exception not one of the little girls made motor noises playing with those cars. That is not learned behavior. It is just something hardwired into the circuitry. Important? Not at all. But it should inform us that God made men and women as different beings.

And probably the men were given the greater size, strength, speed, etc. because they would naturally be the hunters, gatherers, providers, protectors. And the women were given their own special kinds of stamina and abilities because they would bear the children and be the primary nurturers of those children and their community as well as making a home and being the heart of it. Does that mean men cannot be nurturers and/or homemakers or that women cannot be providers? Of course not. But there is a kind of natural rhythm in it all and I think we try to alter it at our peril.
I don't think a conclusion that little boys make motor noises playing with cars and little girls don't is unlearned behavior unless you are sure that these kids don't watch kid TV programs, read books, or play with other kids who exhibit this behavior. Kid's minds are like sponges, they soak up everything, far more than we know.

Well I sure don't intend to get into a debate over it. It is a personal observation that I am reasonably certain has nothing to do with learned behavior. When you have little boys and girls playing with toy cars together--the boys do it, and the girls don't--you have to figure there is some dynamic at work separate from learned behavior.

And I can appreciate that you don't agree with that and that's cool.
My point was that it's really difficult say how much a behavior is due to nature vs nurture. I don't want to debate the issue either.
 
Sometimes it is really subtle things that are tell tale about the inate differences. Watching my son and daughter and also my nieces and nephews and great nieces and nephews play with toy cars. . .without exception all the little boys made motor noises playing with those cars, and without exception not one of the little girls made motor noises playing with those cars. That is not learned behavior. It is just something hardwired into the circuitry. Important? Not at all. But it should inform us that God made men and women as different beings.

And probably the men were given the greater size, strength, speed, etc. because they would naturally be the hunters, gatherers, providers, protectors. And the women were given their own special kinds of stamina and abilities because they would bear the children and be the primary nurturers of those children and their community as well as making a home and being the heart of it. Does that mean men cannot be nurturers and/or homemakers or that women cannot be providers? Of course not. But there is a kind of natural rhythm in it all and I think we try to alter it at our peril.
I don't think a conclusion that little boys make motor noises playing with cars and little girls don't is unlearned behavior unless you are sure that these kids don't watch kid TV programs, read books, or play with other kids who exhibit this behavior. Kid's minds are like sponges, they soak up everything, far more than we know.

Well I sure don't intend to get into a debate over it. It is a personal observation that I am reasonably certain has nothing to do with learned behavior. When you have little boys and girls playing with toy cars together--the boys do it, and the girls don't--you have to figure there is some dynamic at work separate from learned behavior.

And I can appreciate that you don't agree with that and that's cool.
My point was that it's really difficult say how much a behavior is due to nature vs nurture. I don't want to debate the issue either.

Fair enough. :) And I will agree that we don't always know how much is due to nature vs nurture. But in some things, I think I instinctively know the difference between those two things. And maybe that too is a more common characteristic of women vs how a man will see things? I don't know.
 
Sometimes it is really subtle things that are tell tale about the inate differences. Watching my son and daughter and also my nieces and nephews and great nieces and nephews play with toy cars. . .without exception all the little boys made motor noises playing with those cars, and without exception not one of the little girls made motor noises playing with those cars. That is not learned behavior. It is just something hardwired into the circuitry. Important? Not at all. But it should inform us that God made men and women as different beings.

And probably the men were given the greater size, strength, speed, etc. because they would naturally be the hunters, gatherers, providers, protectors. And the women were given their own special kinds of stamina and abilities because they would bear the children and be the primary nurturers of those children and their community as well as making a home and being the heart of it. Does that mean men cannot be nurturers and/or homemakers or that women cannot be providers? Of course not. But there is a kind of natural rhythm in it all and I think we try to alter it at our peril.
I don't think a conclusion that little boys make motor noises playing with cars and little girls don't is unlearned behavior unless you are sure that these kids don't watch kid TV programs, read books, or play with other kids who exhibit this behavior. Kid's minds are like sponges, they soak up everything, far more than we know.

Well I sure don't intend to get into a debate over it. It is a personal observation that I am reasonably certain has nothing to do with learned behavior. When you have little boys and girls playing with toy cars together--the boys do it, and the girls don't--you have to figure there is some dynamic at work separate from learned behavior.

And I can appreciate that you don't agree with that and that's cool.
Thats a great example of learned behavior. Society conditions the boys to prefer playing with cars and the girls to play with dolls.
 
Sometimes it is really subtle things that are tell tale about the inate differences. Watching my son and daughter and also my nieces and nephews and great nieces and nephews play with toy cars. . .without exception all the little boys made motor noises playing with those cars, and without exception not one of the little girls made motor noises playing with those cars. That is not learned behavior. It is just something hardwired into the circuitry. Important? Not at all. But it should inform us that God made men and women as different beings.

And probably the men were given the greater size, strength, speed, etc. because they would naturally be the hunters, gatherers, providers, protectors. And the women were given their own special kinds of stamina and abilities because they would bear the children and be the primary nurturers of those children and their community as well as making a home and being the heart of it. Does that mean men cannot be nurturers and/or homemakers or that women cannot be providers? Of course not. But there is a kind of natural rhythm in it all and I think we try to alter it at our peril.
I don't think a conclusion that little boys make motor noises playing with cars and little girls don't is unlearned behavior unless you are sure that these kids don't watch kid TV programs, read books, or play with other kids who exhibit this behavior. Kid's minds are like sponges, they soak up everything, far more than we know.

Well I sure don't intend to get into a debate over it. It is a personal observation that I am reasonably certain has nothing to do with learned behavior. When you have little boys and girls playing with toy cars together--the boys do it, and the girls don't--you have to figure there is some dynamic at work separate from learned behavior.

And I can appreciate that you don't agree with that and that's cool.
Thats a great example of learned behavior. Society conditions the boys to prefer playing with cars and the girls to play with dolls.

Maybe it once did, but certainly that wasn't the case raising our kids or with their friends as nearly as I can tell. Boys and girls were all given equal opportunity to participate in everything. If daughter got a Barbie, son got a G.I. Joe. Our daughter was never one to play with dolls--our son did when he was little :)--and we didn't argue with them about it in any way. I figure we raised them as closely the same as we could possibly do and they nevertheless became very different people with very different interests and different points of view.
 
Sometimes it is really subtle things that are tell tale about the inate differences. Watching my son and daughter and also my nieces and nephews and great nieces and nephews play with toy cars. . .without exception all the little boys made motor noises playing with those cars, and without exception not one of the little girls made motor noises playing with those cars. That is not learned behavior. It is just something hardwired into the circuitry. Important? Not at all. But it should inform us that God made men and women as different beings.

And probably the men were given the greater size, strength, speed, etc. because they would naturally be the hunters, gatherers, providers, protectors. And the women were given their own special kinds of stamina and abilities because they would bear the children and be the primary nurturers of those children and their community as well as making a home and being the heart of it. Does that mean men cannot be nurturers and/or homemakers or that women cannot be providers? Of course not. But there is a kind of natural rhythm in it all and I think we try to alter it at our peril.
I don't think a conclusion that little boys make motor noises playing with cars and little girls don't is unlearned behavior unless you are sure that these kids don't watch kid TV programs, read books, or play with other kids who exhibit this behavior. Kid's minds are like sponges, they soak up everything, far more than we know.

Well I sure don't intend to get into a debate over it. It is a personal observation that I am reasonably certain has nothing to do with learned behavior. When you have little boys and girls playing with toy cars together--the boys do it, and the girls don't--you have to figure there is some dynamic at work separate from learned behavior.

And I can appreciate that you don't agree with that and that's cool.
Thats a great example of learned behavior. Society conditions the boys to prefer playing with cars and the girls to play with dolls.

Do you think that most boys would prefer to play dolls?
 
Sometimes it is really subtle things that are tell tale about the inate differences. Watching my son and daughter and also my nieces and nephews and great nieces and nephews play with toy cars. . .without exception all the little boys made motor noises playing with those cars, and without exception not one of the little girls made motor noises playing with those cars. That is not learned behavior. It is just something hardwired into the circuitry. Important? Not at all. But it should inform us that God made men and women as different beings.

And probably the men were given the greater size, strength, speed, etc. because they would naturally be the hunters, gatherers, providers, protectors. And the women were given their own special kinds of stamina and abilities because they would bear the children and be the primary nurturers of those children and their community as well as making a home and being the heart of it. Does that mean men cannot be nurturers and/or homemakers or that women cannot be providers? Of course not. But there is a kind of natural rhythm in it all and I think we try to alter it at our peril.
I don't think a conclusion that little boys make motor noises playing with cars and little girls don't is unlearned behavior unless you are sure that these kids don't watch kid TV programs, read books, or play with other kids who exhibit this behavior. Kid's minds are like sponges, they soak up everything, far more than we know.

Well I sure don't intend to get into a debate over it. It is a personal observation that I am reasonably certain has nothing to do with learned behavior. When you have little boys and girls playing with toy cars together--the boys do it, and the girls don't--you have to figure there is some dynamic at work separate from learned behavior.

And I can appreciate that you don't agree with that and that's cool.
Thats a great example of learned behavior. Society conditions the boys to prefer playing with cars and the girls to play with dolls.

Do you think that most boys would prefer to play dolls?
Dont know. Inherently I dont see why it would be something they wouldnt do. GI Joe is a doll.
 
Sometimes it is really subtle things that are tell tale about the inate differences. Watching my son and daughter and also my nieces and nephews and great nieces and nephews play with toy cars. . .without exception all the little boys made motor noises playing with those cars, and without exception not one of the little girls made motor noises playing with those cars. That is not learned behavior. It is just something hardwired into the circuitry. Important? Not at all. But it should inform us that God made men and women as different beings.

And probably the men were given the greater size, strength, speed, etc. because they would naturally be the hunters, gatherers, providers, protectors. And the women were given their own special kinds of stamina and abilities because they would bear the children and be the primary nurturers of those children and their community as well as making a home and being the heart of it. Does that mean men cannot be nurturers and/or homemakers or that women cannot be providers? Of course not. But there is a kind of natural rhythm in it all and I think we try to alter it at our peril.
I don't think a conclusion that little boys make motor noises playing with cars and little girls don't is unlearned behavior unless you are sure that these kids don't watch kid TV programs, read books, or play with other kids who exhibit this behavior. Kid's minds are like sponges, they soak up everything, far more than we know.

Well I sure don't intend to get into a debate over it. It is a personal observation that I am reasonably certain has nothing to do with learned behavior. When you have little boys and girls playing with toy cars together--the boys do it, and the girls don't--you have to figure there is some dynamic at work separate from learned behavior.

And I can appreciate that you don't agree with that and that's cool.
Thats a great example of learned behavior. Society conditions the boys to prefer playing with cars and the girls to play with dolls.

Do you think that most boys would prefer to play dolls?
It depends on the age of child.
Almost all healthy toddlers will copy and enjoy behaviors of the other gender. This kind of play is expected and desirable. Often toddlers will imitate many activities of the opposite sex. In one study, 22.8 percent of boys and 38.6 percent of girls enjoyed 10 or more gender-atypical behaviors (Nelson Textbook of Pediatrics, Saunders 2000).

Whether we're conscious of it or not, parents feel strongly about the gender of their babies. If someone calls her a him, we get just a little defensive. We dress her in a way to remove doubt. We pierce her ears or put bows in her hair. Even though we might want to avoid stereotyped gender roles, we want the world (and our daughter) to know that she is a she.

Between 18 and 30 months most children learn that genders persist, that boys become men and that girls become women. The desire to imitate the same-sex parent becomes quite strong. I think this explains mostly why girls play with dolls and boys play with trucks. Of course the gender roles are enforced in numerous ways, TV, books, schools, and playmates.

Dr. Alan Greene on Gender Identity Issues
 
Sometimes it is really subtle things that are tell tale about the inate differences. Watching my son and daughter and also my nieces and nephews and great nieces and nephews play with toy cars. . .without exception all the little boys made motor noises playing with those cars, and without exception not one of the little girls made motor noises playing with those cars. That is not learned behavior. It is just something hardwired into the circuitry. Important? Not at all. But it should inform us that God made men and women as different beings.

And probably the men were given the greater size, strength, speed, etc. because they would naturally be the hunters, gatherers, providers, protectors. And the women were given their own special kinds of stamina and abilities because they would bear the children and be the primary nurturers of those children and their community as well as making a home and being the heart of it. Does that mean men cannot be nurturers and/or homemakers or that women cannot be providers? Of course not. But there is a kind of natural rhythm in it all and I think we try to alter it at our peril.
I don't think a conclusion that little boys make motor noises playing with cars and little girls don't is unlearned behavior unless you are sure that these kids don't watch kid TV programs, read books, or play with other kids who exhibit this behavior. Kid's minds are like sponges, they soak up everything, far more than we know.

Well I sure don't intend to get into a debate over it. It is a personal observation that I am reasonably certain has nothing to do with learned behavior. When you have little boys and girls playing with toy cars together--the boys do it, and the girls don't--you have to figure there is some dynamic at work separate from learned behavior.

And I can appreciate that you don't agree with that and that's cool.
Thats a great example of learned behavior. Society conditions the boys to prefer playing with cars and the girls to play with dolls.

Do you think that most boys would prefer to play dolls?
It depends on the age of child.
Almost all healthy toddlers will copy and enjoy behaviors of the other gender. This kind of play is expected and desirable. Often toddlers will imitate many activities of the opposite sex. In one study, 22.8 percent of boys and 38.6 percent of girls enjoyed 10 or more gender-atypical behaviors (Nelson Textbook of Pediatrics, Saunders 2000).

Whether we're conscious of it or not, parents feel strongly about the gender of their babies. If someone calls her a him, we get just a little defensive. We dress her in a way to remove doubt. We pierce her ears or put bows in her hair. Even though we might want to avoid stereotyped gender roles, we want the world (and our daughter) to know that she is a she.

Between 18 and 30 months most children learn that genders persist, that boys become men and that girls become women. The desire to imitate the same-sex parent becomes quite strong. I think this explains mostly why girls play with dolls and boys play with trucks. Of course the gender roles are enforced in numerous ways, TV, books, schools, and playmates.

Dr. Alan Greene on Gender Identity Issues

I'm talking about school aged boys. Also, we have kids that are only children (like myself). I played with cars and did some more aggressive physical activities at times. I even went through a tomboy phase, but I believe my interest in the things that I like which would be considered feminine were not "taught" but are just the things that I am naturally drawn to because I like them. The differences in the ways that we are built also accounts for something.
 
I certainly have no issues with girls dressing like girls, knowing they are girls, celebrating their own gender. Ditto for boys. I see that as a very healthy thing. No child should have to grow up thinking his/her gender was something to be dismissed as unimportant any more than anything else about himself or herself. I also have no problem with boys and girls appreciating each other as their own gender with their own inate characteristics and abilities.

The only place I draw the line is when we discourage children from following their dreams and interests purely based on their gender.
 
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I certainly have no issues with girls dressing like girls, knowing they are girls, celebrating their own gender. Ditto for boys. I see that as a very healthy thing. No child should have to grow up thinking his/her gender was something to be dismissed as unimportant any more than anything else about himself or herself. I also have no problem with boys and girls appreciating each other as their own gender with their own inate characteristics and abilities.

The only place I draw the line is when we discourage children from following their dreams and interests purely based on their gender.

But what if their goal is to be the other gender?

scnr-sorry-could-not-resist-smiley-emoticon.gif
 
I don't think a conclusion that little boys make motor noises playing with cars and little girls don't is unlearned behavior unless you are sure that these kids don't watch kid TV programs, read books, or play with other kids who exhibit this behavior. Kid's minds are like sponges, they soak up everything, far more than we know.

Well I sure don't intend to get into a debate over it. It is a personal observation that I am reasonably certain has nothing to do with learned behavior. When you have little boys and girls playing with toy cars together--the boys do it, and the girls don't--you have to figure there is some dynamic at work separate from learned behavior.

And I can appreciate that you don't agree with that and that's cool.
Thats a great example of learned behavior. Society conditions the boys to prefer playing with cars and the girls to play with dolls.

Do you think that most boys would prefer to play dolls?
It depends on the age of child.
Almost all healthy toddlers will copy and enjoy behaviors of the other gender. This kind of play is expected and desirable. Often toddlers will imitate many activities of the opposite sex. In one study, 22.8 percent of boys and 38.6 percent of girls enjoyed 10 or more gender-atypical behaviors (Nelson Textbook of Pediatrics, Saunders 2000).

Whether we're conscious of it or not, parents feel strongly about the gender of their babies. If someone calls her a him, we get just a little defensive. We dress her in a way to remove doubt. We pierce her ears or put bows in her hair. Even though we might want to avoid stereotyped gender roles, we want the world (and our daughter) to know that she is a she.

Between 18 and 30 months most children learn that genders persist, that boys become men and that girls become women. The desire to imitate the same-sex parent becomes quite strong. I think this explains mostly why girls play with dolls and boys play with trucks. Of course the gender roles are enforced in numerous ways, TV, books, schools, and playmates.

Dr. Alan Greene on Gender Identity Issues

I'm talking about school aged boys. Also, we have kids that are only children (like myself). I played with cars and did some more aggressive physical activities at times. I even went through a tomboy phase, but I believe my interest in the things that I like which would be considered feminine were not "taught" but are just the things that I am naturally drawn to because I like them. The differences in the ways that we are built also accounts for something.
By the time most boys are in school, their gender roll is pretty well set. However, genetics can always overcome perceptions of acceptable gender behavior. For example a girl's genetic makeup may make rough and tumble sports more attractive to her than playing with dolls. A boy may find typical play uninteresting because of intelligence or physical characteristics.

Genetics and the environment go hand in hand in determining child behavior. Since we don't turn our children into lab rat where genetic and environmental variables can be controlled, there is just no way to know how much of children's behavior is nature and how much nurture.
 
I certainly have no issues with girls dressing like girls, knowing they are girls, celebrating their own gender. Ditto for boys. I see that as a very healthy thing. No child should have to grow up thinking his/her gender was something to be dismissed as unimportant any more than anything else about himself or herself. I also have no problem with boys and girls appreciating each other as their own gender with their own inate characteristics and abilities.

The only place I draw the line is when we discourage children from following their dreams and interests purely based on their gender.

But what if their goal is to be the other gender?

scnr-sorry-could-not-resist-smiley-emoticon.gif

Do you think it's healthy to encourage such things in young children? Do you believe that a young child would really understand his or her own sexuality?
 
I certainly have no issues with girls dressing like girls, knowing they are girls, celebrating their own gender. Ditto for boys. I see that as a very healthy thing. No child should have to grow up thinking his/her gender was something to be dismissed as unimportant any more than anything else about himself or herself. I also have no problem with boys and girls appreciating each other as their own gender with their own inate characteristics and abilities.

The only place I draw the line is when we discourage children from following their dreams and interests purely based on their gender.

But what if their goal is to be the other gender?

scnr-sorry-could-not-resist-smiley-emoticon.gif

Do you think it's healthy to encourage such things in young children? Do you believe that a young child would really understand his or her own sexuality?
To entourage them, No.
To discourage them, No.
It's not uncommon for young girls and boys to pretend to be of the opposite sex on occasion, particularly if an older sibling and that kid's same-sex friends are all having so much fun playing pirate, wrestling or speckling their faces with eye shadow. Children may also say they wish they were the opposite sex. The worst thing a parent can do is to try to take corrective action. The old advice love and support your children is the best thing you can do. The statistics for parents who do the opposite is horrifying.
 
I certainly have no issues with girls dressing like girls, knowing they are girls, celebrating their own gender. Ditto for boys. I see that as a very healthy thing. No child should have to grow up thinking his/her gender was something to be dismissed as unimportant any more than anything else about himself or herself. I also have no problem with boys and girls appreciating each other as their own gender with their own inate characteristics and abilities.

The only place I draw the line is when we discourage children from following their dreams and interests purely based on their gender.

But what if their goal is to be the other gender?

scnr-sorry-could-not-resist-smiley-emoticon.gif

Do you think it's healthy to encourage such things in young children? Do you believe that a young child would really understand his or her own sexuality?
To entourage them, No.
To discourage them, No.
It's not uncommon for young girls and boys to pretend to be of the opposite sex on occasion, particularly if an older sibling and that kid's same-sex friends are all having so much fun playing pirate, wrestling or speckling their faces with eye shadow. Children may also say they wish they were the opposite sex. The worst thing a parent can do is to try to take corrective action. The old advice love and support your children is the best thing you can do. The statistics for parents who do the opposite is horrifying.

I used to pretend I was a cat. :lol:
 

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