Libertarian Pilgrims Set Sail For Greenland In Search Of A Better Life

[Votto]

Libertarians set sail off the coast of California today to sail to Greenland in the hopes of a new Utopia, devoid of government. The captain of the ship, who wished to not be named, said, "Greenland is the last hope for mankind. The only question becomes, how will we grow our weed in such a cold climate? We can only sit and wait for climate change to really kick in but will just have to settle for booze until then. But look at the bright side, we can have unrestricted abortions like we already had in California! Yay! But how can we get taxpayers to pay for them again?"

Gavin Newsom declared the ship of mutineers and insurrectionists. Gavin declared, "I have just gotten off the phone with my President Xi, and he has assured me that he will send out an army of war balloons to destroy blow them from the waters of the Pacific. Wait, why are they setting sail from California and not the East Coast? What a bunch of pot heads."

President Biden was unavailable for comment.

 

[Foxfyre]

Hmm. This time of year I don't think they can take a northern route to Greenland from California--likely to be completely blocked by ice--and they may have a long wait at the Panama Canal that is only allowing I think 31 ships a day to pass through.

If they bypass Panama and go around the Horn, they'll encounter very rough seas and probably a lot of icebergs.

But if they make it past Xi's war balloons and don't encounter a lot of hostility from the existing Greenland population, they couldn't possibly have it much worse than living in California as a Libertarian these days.

 

[Votto]

Hmm. This time of year I don't think they can take a northern route to Greenland from California--likely to be completely blocked by ice--and they may have a long wait at the Panama Canal that is only allowing I think 31 ships a day to pass through.

If they bypass Panama and go around the Horn, they'll encounter very rough seas and probably a lot of icebergs.

But if they make it past Xi's war balloons and don't encounter a lot of hostility from the existing Greenland population, they couldn't possibly have it much worse than living in California as a Libertarian these days.