I miss my sister

[Lovebears65]

I also agree on the counseling . I went last week and have another appt for next week ..it helped alot

 

[Michelle420]

I have good days and bad days.

Even though we lived in different states we used to go online together and sometimes troll

We had a lot of fun over the years.

The hardest part is trying to understand why she committed suicide.

I still don't understand why. She felt grief over our dad dying in jan 2013 and our cousin in oct 2012 but I don't know why she did this, my heart hurts.

RIP 6-10-2013

Im sorry your going through this. I know what it feels like sadly. It is sad to know I can not pick up the phone and talk to my brother if I wanted too. He was never on the internet so that never changed.

We used to troll a board together and then we would call each other on the phone and laugh.

It was not a political board, we were both into music and movies so we went to entertainment boards.

The last few years her drinking got really bad and we didn't hang out so or talk and towards the end we were not talking at all because she had done some things that at the time I wasn't ready to forgive.

So now I have guilt and regret.

I always loved my sister even when I was mad at her.

Yeah I know what you mean about your brother and now the holidays are coming up it going to be weird for both you and me and our families for sure.

 

[Michelle420]

I suggest writing a goodbye letter to her.
Telling her exactly as you feel, a long letter preferably. It might take several settings to finish it.
After it is done, send it to her email address, or bury it in a nice box somewhere where you both went.
Or frame it and place it among any belongings you might have of hers.
Be open and honest, good or bad.

At the end of the letter, tell her what you are doing to make your own life better. How she still influences you, how she still matters.
I think this would be good for you.

I like that sentence in bold, if there is any way she could know it, I am still working hard to achieve goals and part of that is because of what we went through and how she couldn't quite recover and I want to be able to break that sadness in our family.

 

[Michelle420]

Ropey is such a great poet and friend

 

[Ropey]

Ropey is such a great poet and friend

Thanks drifter. It kind of came out as a balance for me. Sometimes all it takes is a word, sometimes more, sometimes less. Thanks for providing the inspiration that allowed me to look at my losses and share some of it.

So, in that way, it's really for anyone who has suffered a loss and can find some balm in the prose. It's a temporary thing for me and likely that's why this one came out. Commiseration needs company.

Toronto/Ottowa and Vancouver/Oilers in a double header.

laterzzzz...

 

[Sunshine]

I have good days and bad days.

Even though we lived in different states we used to go online together and sometimes troll

We had a lot of fun over the years.

The hardest part is trying to understand why she committed suicide.

I still don't understand why. She felt grief over our dad dying in jan 2013 and our cousin in oct 2012 but I don't know why she did this, my heart hurts.

RIP 6-10-2013

Look for the yellow butterfly:

After Death Communications: Look For the Yellow Butterfly by Patricia Oglesby

 

[Chuckt]

I have good days and bad days.

Even though we lived in different states we used to go online together and sometimes troll

We had a lot of fun over the years.

The hardest part is trying to understand why she committed suicide.

I still don't understand why. She felt grief over our dad dying in jan 2013 and our cousin in oct 2012 but I don't know why she did this, my heart hurts.

RIP 6-10-2013

I'm sorry for your loss.

I lost my mother and my stepmother and had to go between two different hospitals on the same day although their deaths were apart. I lost a stepsister.

I lost my grandmother when I was 5 or 6.
I lost my uncle a few years ago.

I would rather talk to people who were hurting.

Chuck

 

[freedombecki]

I have good days and bad days.

Even though we lived in different states we used to go online together and sometimes troll

We had a lot of fun over the years.

The hardest part is trying to understand why she committed suicide.

I still don't understand why. She felt grief over our dad dying in jan 2013 and our cousin in oct 2012 but I don't know why she did this, my heart hurts.

RIP 6-10-2013

I'm so sorry, drifter. My deepest condolences.

 

[Michelle420]

Grief is so weird, I've been doing good but I skipped a class was feeling suddenly over whelmed again about my dad and sister dying.

I just started thinking about Thanksgiving and how weird it's going to be and how awful for my sisters kids and how we are all going to be together without my sister.

Sometimes it creeps on me when I am in the middle of class or out at the store and I just want to go home and hide.

Today driving home I just cried for no reason.

Posting this mainly because I know other people here lost loved ones recently, lovebear's brother committed suicide in august, just wondering f others are going through this process the same way>?

 

[Michelle420]

I have good days and bad days.

Even though we lived in different states we used to go online together and sometimes troll

We had a lot of fun over the years.

The hardest part is trying to understand why she committed suicide.

I still don't understand why. She felt grief over our dad dying in jan 2013 and our cousin in oct 2012 but I don't know why she did this, my heart hurts.

RIP 6-10-2013

In the whispering wind,
You can look for your sis.
With the birds in bluest sky,
No doubt as lost as you and I.

Although they squawk along,
They continue to wander on.

In this time, I'm not so sure,
How the eagle could know.
To set a course more true,
And bring this comfort to you.

She wanders on in a bird's song,
Maybe hoping that someday.
her friends will sing along,
But your sadness is ok.

Your song is still long,
So you wander on...



...but not alone.

Wish you were here Ropey

[ame=http://youtu.be/RSr27zRZzuY]Pink Floyd Wish You Were Here lyrics and meaning - YouTube[/ame]

 

[BDBoop]

I have good days and bad days.

Even though we lived in different states we used to go online together and sometimes troll

We had a lot of fun over the years.

The hardest part is trying to understand why she committed suicide.

I still don't understand why. She felt grief over our dad dying in jan 2013 and our cousin in oct 2012 but I don't know why she did this, my heart hurts.

RIP 6-10-2013

My heart hurts for you. My sister is my rock, she takes her BSD (Big Sister Duties) very seriously, and we're in our mid-50's. I cannot imagine life without her, and I am so very sorry that this is your reality.

 

[Michelle420]

Thinking about you sis as the anniversary approaches miss you !

Lately I haven't been myself at all
It's heavy on my mind

I'm dreaming again
Like I've always been
And way down low
I know​

 

[strollingbones]

i am sorry for you loss....

 

[MeBelle]

 

[Michelle420]

Thanks, today was a pretty bad day actually, ended with family members blaming each other for what happened. I feel pretty shaken and sad.

 

[skye]

I miss my father

I miss him so bad

fuck everything else

I miss him with all my heart

like you savages will understand what I mean
'
whatever

 

[Michelle420]

I miss my father

I miss him so bad

fuck everything else

I miss him with all my heart

like you savages will understand what I mean
'
whatever

Yeah, it's a horrible pain.

 

[skye]

I miss my father

I miss him so bad

fuck everything else

I miss him with all my heart

like you savages will understand what I mean
'
whatever

Yeah, it's a horrible pain.

it's more than that...it cuts to the bone....he was the best in this world...the most intelligent.the funniest...the most handsome...he should not be gone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

it's not fair...I need him so much

 

[Michelle420]

I miss my father

I miss him so bad

fuck everything else

I miss him with all my heart

like you savages will understand what I mean
'
whatever

Yeah, it's a horrible pain.

it's more than that...it cuts to the bone....he was the best in this world...the most intelligent.the funniest...the most handsome...he should not be gone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

it's not fair...I need him so much

It's not fair. I am sorry you are going through this pain as well.

 

[skye]

handsome fathers ...like mine

should never die

never