Family Values means on counselling for battered women

[strollingbones]

I believe that any "counseling" that is done should be done about the time a young woman starts to date, like around 16. Not once they've been beat. I believe that men who feel the need to totally control a woman can tell who will be receptive and who won't. The desparate woman who feels she can't LIVE without a man is perfect for him. My man likes a feisty woman who stands up to him. He would never be interested in a desparate woman.

But you see these young girls just frantic if they don't have a boyfriend and they don't really care -- long as he has a penis , that's all they care about.

you have a really low opinion of women, dont you?

What are you talking about? I AM a woman. I'm saying, some young girls are desparate for boyfriends and the ones that are, they are more likely to fall in with a control freak and potential batterer and feel that's their lot in life.

i realize you are female...that makes your comments all the more sad....

we have enough with men putting women down and saying we deserve this and that....but its doubly as evil when women do it....

 

[2twsted4colorTV]

[/B]

you have a really low opinion of women, dont you?

What are you talking about? I AM a woman. I'm saying, some young girls are desparate for boyfriends and the ones that are, they are more likely to fall in with a control freak and potential batterer and feel that's their lot in life.

i realize you are female...that makes your comments all the more sad....

we have enough with men putting women down and saying we deserve this and that....but its doubly as evil when women do it....

I did NOT say women "deserved" anything. I'll say it one more time - young women need to be taught NOT to be desparate for a man. That is one of the reasons these women put up with abuse is they feel they HAVE to, they have no way out, they, in their desparation for a man attract the WRONG KIND OF MAN. how in the hell is that putting down women?

 

[2twsted4colorTV]

Exactly! That's what I just said. Start in when the gals are beginning to date. But even gals from homes where they DIDN'T see beating, can be desparate for boyfriends and ignore the control and all the signs of a batterer-to-be. It isn't always girls from abusive homes.

I agree, junior high courses in what are the laws and what is the repercussions of this type of violence could go along way. For BOTH boys and girls

Yep, Junior High Courses. Johnny can't read now. He has absolutely NO CLUE what the capital of Oklahoma is (Oklahoma City for those of you that just went "huh"?) and we are going to add more CRAP to the school day by yanking all the female students out of class and giving them a course saying that they shouldn't let someone cave in their nose.

You have this outlook that the answer is ALWAYS the government. Got an itch? Then there should be a Department of Itching that is responsible for it. Got bad TV reception. Another government agency. Tire's gone flat? Wow, such a chance for a government agency - The Department of Air!

Okay, let me say two words that just must scare the HELL out of you... PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY. I realize that you felt this uncontrollable shiver run down your spine, but it actually becomes VERY REFRESHING when you are responsible for YOURSELF. So, you teach your kids that NO ONE should touch them unless they want them to and leave Johnny in the school house learning the three "R"'s.

I agree. I"m advocating this "teaching" to be done by the parents. But it wouldn't hurt to make it part of the "health" class that is required for graduation in many schools. You know right along with teaching about menstruation, etc? Instead of Mrs. Obama ranting about obesity, she might take up THIS cause. Hmm? (I'm on YOUR side about the "Department of Air" bit - shit I'm surprised we don't have a "Department of Toilet paper")

 

[strollingbones]

all they care about is a penis?

perhaps that is all the young ladies you associate with care about but i do not find that to be what the young ladies i know care about. Most are concerned with getting an education and moving on with life..you seem to think only desperate women are beaten....you are wrong...women are beaten in all classes of cultures....upper, middle and lower...just the upper and middle cover it better and dont call the police. strong independent women are abused too

 

[Luissa]

nice blaming the victim....

He said it in an asshole way, but he somewhat has a point.

I had a friend who was hit by her boyfriend, she called the Cops, he went to jail and she broke up with him. I worked with both of them, and he wasn't over there forcing her to come back, but a month later they were back together. Three months later we were out at the lake and I watched her punch him in the side of the face. She stayed with him for another year.

Do I think some women have no choice? Of course I do.
Do I think some do, and choose to stay? Very much so, seen it many times. Do I think some women punch their boyfriends in the face, then call the cops when they try to restrain them? Yes.

Some of these women do need counseling as to why they seek out fucked up relationships, and feed into it.

 

[2twsted4colorTV]

all they care about is a penis?

perhaps that is all the young ladies you associate with care about but i do not find that to be what the young ladies i know care about. Most are concerned with getting an education and moving on with life..you seem to think only desperate women are beaten....you are wrong...women are beaten in all classes of cultures....upper, middle and lower...just the upper and middle cover it better and dont call the police. strong independent women are abused too

I meant by that - it meets the criteria for being a MAN. For Christ sake!

when strong independent women such as myself (and I WAS slapped ONCE) are beaten we are more likely to get out from the get go and not hang around denying it, feeling we deserve it. Because the best time to get out is after the FIRST slap, not the zillionith.

 

[Luissa]

all they care about is a penis?

perhaps that is all the young ladies you associate with care about but i do not find that to be what the young ladies i know care about. Most are concerned with getting an education and moving on with life..you seem to think only desperate women are beaten....you are wrong...women are beaten in all classes of cultures....upper, middle and lower...just the upper and middle cover it better and dont call the police. strong independent women are abused too

I meant by that - it meets the criteria for being a MAN. For Christ sake!

when strong independent women such as myself (and I WAS slapped ONCE) are beaten we are more likely to get out from the get go and not hang around denying it, feeling we deserve it. Because the best time to get out is after the FIRST slap, not the zillionith.

I have never been slapped, hit etc. If I ever was I sure as hell wouldn't stick around.
I doubt it will ever happen though, I am not the type men beat, plus I have four brothers.

 

[Katzndogz]

Counseling doesn't help these women. They need psychiatric care. The best that counseling can do is help these women leave that particular batterer. Many of them will simply look for a new batterer.

 

[2twsted4colorTV]

all they care about is a penis?

perhaps that is all the young ladies you associate with care about but i do not find that to be what the young ladies i know care about. Most are concerned with getting an education and moving on with life..you seem to think only desperate women are beaten....you are wrong...women are beaten in all classes of cultures....upper, middle and lower...just the upper and middle cover it better and dont call the police. strong independent women are abused too

I meant by that - it meets the criteria for being a MAN. For Christ sake!

when strong independent women such as myself (and I WAS slapped ONCE) are beaten we are more likely to get out from the get go and not hang around denying it, feeling we deserve it. Because the best time to get out is after the FIRST slap, not the zillionith.

I have never been slapped, hit etc. If I ever was I sure as hell wouldn't stick around.
I doubt it will ever happen though, I am not the type men beat, plus I have four brothers.

Absolutely! My mother in law was a woman who couldn't live without a man. She put up with abuse, not physical, but controlling by my father in law for over 50 years until he finally died. But did she then start a new life and do as she pleased? Heavens no, she couldn't stand being alone, so she promptly found a boyfriend. He wasn't abusive, but nobody could stand him. He died. Then she promptly found another, this time 25 years younger. She didn't much care what kind of man she had, only that he was a man who would drive her places, out to dinner, trips here and there. She was desparate and clingy needy. Oh well, to each his own. If my man dies before me, I'm gonna do all the things he never wanted to do, am NOT going to look for another man. And - men can be desparate too, for women, and put up with controlling women as well just because THEY don't want to be alone. Works both ways.

 

[Katzndogz]

My dearest friend was a very strong, independent woman who never married. She was a superb attorney. Then, in her 50s, she met a man. In a very short time, he controlled her entire life. He chose what clothes she would wear, right down to panties and bra. He wasn't physically abusive he was emotionally abusive. He told her what she was going to have for breakfast. He arranged her court schedule. He cheated on her unmercifully. There wasn't one second of her life that he did not actively control. He monitored all her phone calls! After awhile, unless he told her what to do, she couldn't do anything. She sat on the floor in the bathroom waiting for him to tell her whether to take a shower or not.

She loved it. I can't explain it. I expected him to be shown the door. Nope. Needless to say, this did not end well.

 

[OohPooPahDoo]

Isn't there funds from states to help with the battered women? Why would the federal government even get involved with this?

The OP has nothing to do with state or federal funding for counseling of battered women.

 

[OohPooPahDoo]

Go hug a tree asshat.
Conservatives are concerned with family violence, of any type.

So concerned that you equate battered women with trees.

There are plenty of state funded policies that deal with violence against women, such as DELTA.

And? I don't see your point.

Wouldn't "the right thing to do" is put a Cadillac in every garage? Just another ultra liberal figuring out a way to spend more money that we don't have. You never fail, wry, Frisco has taught you well.

??? The OP has nothing to do with funding.

 

[Dont Taz Me Bro]

From Family PAC Federal Vice President Sandy Rios on Fox:

“Is the White House out of their mind? Does the West Wing not know what the left wing is doing? We’re $14 trillion in debt and now we’re going to cover birth control, breast pumps, counseling for abuse? Are we going to do pedicures and manicures as well?”

Fox News Compares Helping Battered Women To Getting a Manicure | Addicting Info

Counseling for abused women = PEDICURE according to FOX.

Why does the federal government need to do this?

 

[Katzndogz]

I've counseled battered women, particulary very young teen mothers. Odd they should be compared to trees. I've compared them to trees MANY times! They are like trees in the forest. They have as much control over their lives as a rooted oak. If it rains on them, they get wet.

Pitiful and pathetic. The suggestion to these women and girls that they CAN exercise some level of control, they don't have to stay and get beaten up, they don't have to get pregnant at 12 years old is met with anger, resentment and rage.

 

[Meister]

Go hug a tree asshat.
Conservatives are concerned with family violence, of any type.

So concerned that you equate battered women with trees.

There are plenty of state funded policies that deal with violence against women, such as DELTA.

And? I don't see your point.

Wouldn't "the right thing to do" is put a Cadillac in every garage? Just another ultra liberal figuring out a way to spend more money that we don't have. You never fail, wry, Frisco has taught you well.

??? The OP has nothing to do with funding.

I'm glad you broke that down like I was responding to your post or something. To clear things up....I was responding to wry. Comprendo?

We have programs at the state level in place already to help the abused family member...not just battered wives or mothers.
Let the states handle these issues, we don't need to get the feds involved in these matters.

Try and remember why we are called "United States" of America and not just America.

 

[Meister]

From Family PAC Federal Vice President Sandy Rios on Fox:

“Is the White House out of their mind? Does the West Wing not know what the left wing is doing? We’re $14 trillion in debt and now we’re going to cover birth control, breast pumps, counseling for abuse? Are we going to do pedicures and manicures as well?”

Fox News Compares Helping Battered Women To Getting a Manicure | Addicting Info

Counseling for abused women = PEDICURE according to FOX.

I think it might have been that Fox was really asking where is the line that the feds won't cross regarding the liberals's fantasy of a nanny state. Does this clarify it for you?

 

[2twsted4colorTV]

I've counseled battered women, particulary very young teen mothers. Odd they should be compared to trees. I've compared them to trees MANY times! They are like trees in the forest. They have as much control over their lives as a rooted oak. If it rains on them, they get wet.

Pitiful and pathetic. The suggestion to these women and girls that they CAN exercise some level of control, they don't have to stay and get beaten up, they don't have to get pregnant at 12 years old is met with anger, resentment and rage.

that's what I was referring to when I said these young girls think there is something wrong with them if they don't have a boyfriend. And they don't much care how they are treated by this boyfriend, only that they have one. they will do anything to keep such a boyfriend, have his baby, get beat up, whatever it takes. It never ends when they get older.

 

[Katzndogz]

I've counseled battered women, particulary very young teen mothers. Odd they should be compared to trees. I've compared them to trees MANY times! They are like trees in the forest. They have as much control over their lives as a rooted oak. If it rains on them, they get wet.

Pitiful and pathetic. The suggestion to these women and girls that they CAN exercise some level of control, they don't have to stay and get beaten up, they don't have to get pregnant at 12 years old is met with anger, resentment and rage.

that's what I was referring to when I said these young girls think there is something wrong with them if they don't have a boyfriend. And they don't much care how they are treated by this boyfriend, only that they have one. they will do anything to keep such a boyfriend, have his baby, get beat up, whatever it takes. It never ends when they get older.

It's more than just having a boyfriend. More than just having a man in their lives. They really are like trees who don't much have an interest in who sits in their shade! Most of these girls didn't have a boyfriend at all! They had sex because someone took their pants off. Some battered women just need to have a batterer in their lives. A man who doesn't batter is simply unacceptable.

 

[2twsted4colorTV]

I've counseled battered women, particulary very young teen mothers. Odd they should be compared to trees. I've compared them to trees MANY times! They are like trees in the forest. They have as much control over their lives as a rooted oak. If it rains on them, they get wet.

Pitiful and pathetic. The suggestion to these women and girls that they CAN exercise some level of control, they don't have to stay and get beaten up, they don't have to get pregnant at 12 years old is met with anger, resentment and rage.

that's what I was referring to when I said these young girls think there is something wrong with them if they don't have a boyfriend. And they don't much care how they are treated by this boyfriend, only that they have one. they will do anything to keep such a boyfriend, have his baby, get beat up, whatever it takes. It never ends when they get older.

It's more than just having a boyfriend. More than just having a man in their lives. They really are like trees who don't much have an interest in who sits in their shade! Most of these girls didn't have a boyfriend at all! They had sex because someone took their pants off. Some battered women just need to have a batterer in their lives. A man who doesn't batter is simply unacceptable.

I suppose. But I wonder if isn't that they can't or don't attract one who doesn't batter. They are somehow convinced that is what they deserve. They NEED to be controlled.

 

[Meister]

I do believe they feel they need to be controlled. I also think that their parents....for the most part, had something similiar going on when the child was growing up, at least some point in the childhood.