Democrats and Cows

Discussion in 'Humor' started by CrimsonWhite, May 23, 2006.

  1. CrimsonWhite

    CrimsonWhite *****istrator Emeritus Supporting Member

    Mar 13, 2006
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    A West Texas cowboy was tending to his herd in a remote pasture
    when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud towards him.
    The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban
    sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out the window and asks the cowboy,

    "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will
    you give me a calf?"

    The cowboy looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his
    peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, Why not?"

    The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer,
    connects it to his AT&T cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the
    Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite navigation system to get an
    exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite
    that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo. The young man
    then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an
    image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany. Within seconds, he
    receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed
    and the data stored. He then accesses a MS-SQL database through an ODBC
    connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a
    few minutes, receives a response. Finally, he prints out a full-color,
    150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and
    finally turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly 1586 cows and

    "That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says
    the cowboy.

    He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks
    on amused as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car. Then the
    cowboy says to the young man,

    "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give the calf back to me?"

    The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay,
    why not?"

    You're a consultant for the Democratic Party."
    says the cowboy.

    "Wow......that's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess

    "No guessing required." answered the cowboy.

    "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You tried to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know a darn thing about cows........

    Now, let my dog out of your trunk".
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1

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