You run the national gooey-cheese manufacturing and distribution businesses, and I want to regulate you. Can I do that effectively? Yes Ma'am, I can! So glad you asked. Step One: Create and fund the US Gooey Cheese Industry Watchdog Agency. Step Two: Hire reasonably competent and intelligent people to staff it. Step Three: Tell each and every one of them that if there is a gooey cheese disaster they are all getting fired, down to the very last ready-to-retire administrative assistant. Failure to regulate is not an option. Step Four: Prohibit BY LAW any career moves between the Gooey Cheese Industry and the Gooey Cheese Industry Watchdog Agency. Period. You have worked for one, you can never ever work for the other. Get caught trying to and you go to prison. Step Five: Prohibit Gooey Cheese Industry Watchdog Agency employees from marrying, domesticating with or getting all preggers by or with any Gooey Cheese Industry employee, director, owner, lobbyist or Major Consumer. Take a vow of matrimony with one and you must take a hike. No job here, and no job ever with the Gooey Cheese Industry. Step Six: Prohibit by law any Gooey Cheese Industry Watchdog Agency employee from owning directly, indirectly or by any convoluted means dreamed up by some hotshot lawyer any interest in the assets or income of any business or subsidiary of the Gooey Cheese Industry PERIOD. Get caught doing so and you go to prison. Step Seven: Limit all employment in the Gooey Cheese Industry Watchdog Agency to a term of three years. After that, you are OUT unless you move up or down. No laterals. Step Eight: Audit the tax returns of all Gooey Cheese Industry Watchdog Agency employees. Anyone caught accepting zippity-do-dah from a Gooey Cheese Industry employee, director, owner, lobbyist or Major Consumer gets sent to prison. These people can accept NOTHING. EVER. Step Nine: Set the Gooey Cheese Industry Watchdog Agency on the US Government Org chart under "Government Accounting Office" supervision and budget. Step Ten: Write some regulations about Gooey Cheese.