I don't think it is selfish I think it is compassionate. You made a mistake and let your temper and ego get the better of you. She also did the same thing and it escalated. She got the power or upper hand. She won't let it go because you won't. So now it has become a situation out of your hands and in the laws hands. You said your lawyer said you had a good chance. That is not 100% guaranteed. You won't let it go so you are going to stay in a state of upset. That is actually a choice. Why you make that choice to stay upset is probably a selfish reason. Your getting something out of it. If you were done with it you would move on.I'm not sure what my duty is as a private citizen.
I am a man that joined the Marine Corps 3 days after I turned 18. I have ran for political office 3 times knowing that some charade like this would be a likely outcome. Am I shirking my duties as a citizen to allow something like this to happen?. Your advice is the same advice I get from everyone. Be selfish and comfortable. I'm very well aware of what the best thing for me to do personally. What is the best thing for me to do for society? If there is something I can do then i want to do it. If there is nothing i can do then yes. The selfish route is the way to go. This "crime" isn't bad enough to protect children. However adults are so vulnerable to this horrific "crime". Somebody made a boo boo probably at the legislative level. I get what you are saying. I will just feel terrible 20 years from now to find out I was in a position to be miserable for 20 additional years in order to correct this problem but I shamefully chose comfort instead.
I am not a selfish person at all.