The guest who is served First
Years ago it was traditional to serve the host and hostess first, a custom that originated in the Middle Ages to demonstrate that the food was not poisoned. Today the custom is observed only in a few instances: to demonstrate to guests from a foreign country the correct way to proceed; when a hostess is dining alone with her family; or if a hostess is dining with a group of younger women.
Customarily, the honored guest is served first, a courtesy that affords a selection of the choicest food from an untouched platter. Service begins with the lady of honor seated to the right of the host, proceeds counterclockwise, and ends with the host. But when a formal affair has no one guest of honor, service begins with the most important female guest. Depending on individual circumstances, there are several ways to serve a formal meal.
Ladies served first. At a large formal dinner, or one where strict protocol is followed, service may commence with the women, starting with the lady of honor. Although this is a courteous method of service, it is slow, as each butler must circle the table numerous times and crisscross around the room.
Service in the order of progression. At a small formal dinner where less help is provided, service in the order of progression commences with the lady of honor seated to the right of the host and proceeds counterclockwise around the table, ending with the host. The hostess is served in the order of progression and commences to eat as soon as she is served so that others may begin to eat while the course is at its proper temperature. The butler does not double back around the table, and the meal is not delayed.
Service for a single hostess and an acting host. When a single hostess asks a gentleman to act as her host, he is seated opposite her. The lady of honor is seated on his right hand and is served first. The hostess is served in the order of progression and the acting host is served last.
Service for a single hostess without a host. The lady of honor is seated at the end of the table opposite the hostess, and she is served first. The order of ser vice proceeds from the lady of honor counterclockwise. Because there is no host the hostess is served last. As the arrangement is not balanced with al ternate male-female seating, this form of service is rare.
Service for a single host without a hostess. A host without a hostess seats the lady of honor to his right. Service begins with her and proceeds counter clockwise around the table, ending with the host.
Alternating service for each course. To avoid serving the same guest last, alternate service is provided. The first course commences with the lady of honor and proceeds counterclockwise around the table. The second course starts with the lady seated to the left of the host and progresses clockwise. Each time the host is served last.
