The Top Ways to Tell the Difference Between a Protest and a Riot
FlaCalTenn August 31st 2020
Too many clueless media talking heads, politicians, city mayors and councils, state governors and warriors of both feuding political tribes seem to have endless issues telling the difference between a protest and a riot. I’m here to clear this up once and for all. Join me in an old fashioned David Letterman type countdown to learn how to recognize these two totally unrelated types of public gatherings.
NUMBER 10
For a protest the organizers contact people to speak, advertise on Social Media, offer ride shares, appoint march escorts, and ask for volunteers to provide first aid. Best time for a protest is between 10AM and 8PM because all the folks have to work the next day.
For a riot, you get a blasted, coded text which you decipher with an official Captain Crunch Decoder Ring. Only time for a riot is the dead of night when the neighborhood is trying to sleep and the businesses and public buildings are closed.
NUMBER 9
For a protest you dress sensibly for the weather, bring a covid mask and put on your best slogan T-shirt.
For a riot, you bring your helmet, riot shield, gas mask, extra large backpack, face shield, knee/elbow pads and maybe an umbrella regardless of the weather if you’re important or wanted by police.
NUMBER 8
For a protest, you bring a sign, some granola bars, and a thermos of cold Gator Aid.
For a riot, you pack Molotov material, a small sledge hammer, commercial fireworks, a blinding laser, maybe a baseball bat or a pipe and the name of the Attorney they gave you to call to make bail.
NUMBER 7
Protest organizers supply bullhorns, microphones and amplifiers, appoint spokespeople to speak for them.
Riots don’t have organizers silly – they are Anarchists, but somebody usually brings a gigantic boom box with a one hour mix of “Flight of the Valkeries” and inspirational revolutionary songs while they work.
NUMBER 6
You can bring your kid to a protest or make it a date at a protest. Protesters encourage passer-bys to join in.
You can’t tell sex or gender at a riot with all that gear so forget hooking up and you probably don’t have kids (or aren’t allowed near any). At a riot, any cars and people passing by are stopped, yelled at, berated, and attacked.
NUMBER 5
For a protest the city police follow the marchers, block off traffic, survey the crowd for weapons, and keep counter protesters at bay.
For a riot the Democrat mayor instructs the police to stay back 4 or 6 blocks, encourages clashes with counter protesters, and allows innocent people or vehicles to wander into the riot zone until he or she gets an injury or shots fired report. Won’t be needing the Fire department. EMTs -- not even on high alert.
NUMBER 4
At a protest, if the police are present, protesters yell at them, call them names and shake barriers.
At a riot, rioters pelt police with frozen cans and bottles, bags of urine or feces, pipes, baseball bats. Blind them with lasers or draw them towards pre-positioned caches of stone, concrete and brick..
NUMBER 3
Protesters are booked for breaking curfew, resisting arrest, disorderly conduct and ticketed for parking violations.
Rioters are booked for arson, looting, destruction of public property, assault, murder, possession of deadly weapons, felony theft, and an average of two outstanding felony warrants.
NUMBER 2
For a protest the major media sends out reporters and camera crews and features it at the top of their nightly news.
For a riot, you’ll only hear about it from cell phone freelancers on YouTube or in a Trump tweet.
** AND THE NUMBER ONE WAY TO TELL THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A PROTEST AND A RIOT IS ***
NUMBER 1
Protests can occur in any city or town in any American city and there’s no rightful blame.
Riots almost exclusively occur in deep blue metros so that Democrat city mayors and councils can blame the damage and human suffering on Republicans in power, global conspiracies, racists, bigots or Trump – when THEY are the ones aiding and abetting the rioters.
____________________________________________________________________________________________________
Feel free to share with all the clueless you might know. And if you're unfortunate enough to live in one of those deep blue cities that want to defund/abolish/scorn the police -- be sure to send one to your mayor and city council members.
FlaCalTenn August 31st 2020
Too many clueless media talking heads, politicians, city mayors and councils, state governors and warriors of both feuding political tribes seem to have endless issues telling the difference between a protest and a riot. I’m here to clear this up once and for all. Join me in an old fashioned David Letterman type countdown to learn how to recognize these two totally unrelated types of public gatherings.
NUMBER 10
For a protest the organizers contact people to speak, advertise on Social Media, offer ride shares, appoint march escorts, and ask for volunteers to provide first aid. Best time for a protest is between 10AM and 8PM because all the folks have to work the next day.
For a riot, you get a blasted, coded text which you decipher with an official Captain Crunch Decoder Ring. Only time for a riot is the dead of night when the neighborhood is trying to sleep and the businesses and public buildings are closed.
NUMBER 9
For a protest you dress sensibly for the weather, bring a covid mask and put on your best slogan T-shirt.
For a riot, you bring your helmet, riot shield, gas mask, extra large backpack, face shield, knee/elbow pads and maybe an umbrella regardless of the weather if you’re important or wanted by police.
NUMBER 8
For a protest, you bring a sign, some granola bars, and a thermos of cold Gator Aid.
For a riot, you pack Molotov material, a small sledge hammer, commercial fireworks, a blinding laser, maybe a baseball bat or a pipe and the name of the Attorney they gave you to call to make bail.
NUMBER 7
Protest organizers supply bullhorns, microphones and amplifiers, appoint spokespeople to speak for them.
Riots don’t have organizers silly – they are Anarchists, but somebody usually brings a gigantic boom box with a one hour mix of “Flight of the Valkeries” and inspirational revolutionary songs while they work.
NUMBER 6
You can bring your kid to a protest or make it a date at a protest. Protesters encourage passer-bys to join in.
You can’t tell sex or gender at a riot with all that gear so forget hooking up and you probably don’t have kids (or aren’t allowed near any). At a riot, any cars and people passing by are stopped, yelled at, berated, and attacked.
NUMBER 5
For a protest the city police follow the marchers, block off traffic, survey the crowd for weapons, and keep counter protesters at bay.
For a riot the Democrat mayor instructs the police to stay back 4 or 6 blocks, encourages clashes with counter protesters, and allows innocent people or vehicles to wander into the riot zone until he or she gets an injury or shots fired report. Won’t be needing the Fire department. EMTs -- not even on high alert.
NUMBER 4
At a protest, if the police are present, protesters yell at them, call them names and shake barriers.
At a riot, rioters pelt police with frozen cans and bottles, bags of urine or feces, pipes, baseball bats. Blind them with lasers or draw them towards pre-positioned caches of stone, concrete and brick..
NUMBER 3
Protesters are booked for breaking curfew, resisting arrest, disorderly conduct and ticketed for parking violations.
Rioters are booked for arson, looting, destruction of public property, assault, murder, possession of deadly weapons, felony theft, and an average of two outstanding felony warrants.
NUMBER 2
For a protest the major media sends out reporters and camera crews and features it at the top of their nightly news.
For a riot, you’ll only hear about it from cell phone freelancers on YouTube or in a Trump tweet.
** AND THE NUMBER ONE WAY TO TELL THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A PROTEST AND A RIOT IS ***
NUMBER 1
Protests can occur in any city or town in any American city and there’s no rightful blame.
Riots almost exclusively occur in deep blue metros so that Democrat city mayors and councils can blame the damage and human suffering on Republicans in power, global conspiracies, racists, bigots or Trump – when THEY are the ones aiding and abetting the rioters.
____________________________________________________________________________________________________
Feel free to share with all the clueless you might know. And if you're unfortunate enough to live in one of those deep blue cities that want to defund/abolish/scorn the police -- be sure to send one to your mayor and city council members.
