The GMILF, the Sasquatch, and Dylan: A Wokester Parable

Lord Long Rod

Diamond Member
Jan 17, 2023
7,706
8,151
2,138
The GMILF, The Sasquatch, and Dylan


Dylan was heartbroken. He did everything right. He was a staunch supporter of feminism, kept his white privilege in check, subordinated himself in every way to marginalized peoples, possessed an unbridled hatred of Jews, was an ANTIFA ally, and was in the process of having his penis removed so that he could transition into a woman (and decolonize himself). Still, no matter what he did, he just could not win the heart of the young lass he was in love with.



Her name is AmandaX. She is a green haired, thoroughly tattooed and pierced beauty who dedicates 100% of her time for just causes, like climate change, social justice, prison reform, and Nazi-level Jew hating. She is so hardcore that she ripped off her own clitoris at a BLM protest and swallowed it so that nothing would distract her from her advocacy work, even pleasure. God (generally speaking, not the Judea-Christian colonizer God), she is so attractive!



Dylan confessed his feelings to AmandaX one night on a date to the homeless shelter to hand out clean needles and H. She explained to him that while she is touched by his feelings for her, she can never have her vagina colonized by a white male penis. Nonetheless, the two of them grew closer and closer over time. However, their only release was when she pegged Dylan (with black and brown dildos). Then, once they decided to become serious about their inter-gender partnership, they realized what had to be done. Dylan had to transition into a woman, thereby removing his white phallus of white male supremacy and hate. It was only when he chopped his wang off that he could date the lady of his dreams! It was so clear now!



Meanwhile, Sylvia, an amateur anthropologist, was busying herself with preparations for her latest sojourn into the dark, deep woods of the rugged and mountainous hills and valleys of Western North Carolina. She had located a family unit of Sasquatch up there, consisting of an Alpha-male father, a mother, another adult female, and 3 juvenile creatures. She has been interacting with this clan for years. It was a grueling endeavor. She had to contend with a lot of threatening behavior from the Alpha male, who was merely trying to protect his family. But, over time, Sylvia made progress. She slowly earned their trust. Now, she is accepted into the bigfoot family, like an aunt or some other collateral familial figure.



Sylvia knows she has made groundbreaking progress. Not only has she located this group and gained its trust, but she now possesses irrefutable proof of the existence of these creatures. She even has video footage of her encounters, lots of footage. If she released her data to the public, it would turn science on its head. It would disrupt so many conventions and beliefs in the scientific community that it would be revolutionary. People would try to suppress the information and discredit her in order to maintain the establishment. But it would not matter, as her proof of the existence of these beings is too strong for anyone or anything to overcome. Sylvia literally held the future of science and mankind in her hands.



But there was just one thing that was holding her back. See, in order to make such in-roads in the clan, she had to offer herself to the Alpha male. In fact, she had to offer herself to him several times. She was disgusted at first. But then she came to know these creatures as a type of human. Over time she even derived pleasure from the trysts. Finally, her role as sasquatch concubine became cemented in the clan. The other females did not really like her, but they tolerated her because that is what the big guy wanted. Apparently, Sylvia really did the trick with “George”, Sylvia’s pet name for him (i.e., George Floyd) because he always got so excited when she showed up at their home. It was not unlike how a pet dog acts when his master returns home after a full day of work. But because of the intimate nature of her work, Sylvia was a little too embarrassed to release her work to the public.



Before Sylvia left for her latest bigfoot whoring trip to southern Appalachia, she received a phone call from her nephew, Dylan. He sounded very distraught. Sylvia did not fully understand what he was talking about, but based upon what Dylan was blubbering to her over the call, she surmised it had something to do with a green-haired neo-Nazi chick who was trying to cut off his dick. Sylvia could not miss her date with George. Neither could she leave her poor nephew so distraught. See, Dylan had nobody. Both of his parents drowned trying to save the whales from Japanese whalers.



So, Sylvia decided to invite Dylan along for her weekend of sas-crotching. “Oh, aunt Sylvia, I am afraid of the woods. White men go to the woods to colonize and murder animals”, he said. Sylvian sighed over what a dipshit nephew she had. But she talked him into going with her anyway, assuring Dylan that there would be no white males in the woods to make him feel unsafe.



On the drive to the mountains, Sylvia received a phone call from Edith, her long-time friend. Poor Edith has fallen and could not get back up. Her nearest relative was her grandchildren, and both of them were off on vacation to Gaza. So, Sylvia and Dylan made a diversion and set out to save poor Edith.



When they arrived at Edith’s house, they busted down the door and found Edith lying face down on the bathroom floor. Upon sight of her, something strange happened to Dylan. He was mesmerized, standing there looking down at Edith’s naked body, bare ass up in the air. “Jesus Christ … This is HOT!!”, he thought.



The two of them got Edith up and dressed. She was ok, and refused a trip to the ER to get checked out. She had slipped on the wet floor and was just unable to get up. Sylvia told her she needed to be more careful. Edith responded, “Oh, Sylvia, I know I should. But I had just got finished watching “Matlock” and I was all excited to take a bath and rub 2 or 3 out.” Dylan knew exactly what she meant. His member immediately stiffened.



Sylvia explained to Dylan later on that night, long after Edith had drifted off to sleep while watching “Long, Black Cocks, Part 17”, that poor Edith suffers from a condition known as nymphomania. Dylan recalled hearing this term at the poetry slams AmandaX used to take him to as the “Screaming Vagina” coffee house. A quick inquiry on Google confirmed what it was. You could virtually see the steam boiling out of Dylan’s ears from the fires that burned deep within.



Later on, around 3:30 a.m., Dylan could take the burning no more. He got out of bed and quietly crept out of Edith’s guestroom, raging throbber in hand. He was headed to Edith’s bedroom. Dylan figured he would just sort of look at hot Edith, GMILF extraordinaire, while he played with himself. But as he turned the door knob to Edith’s room he knew he was going to do something far more sinister. He would unleash the rage and frustration of one billions incels the world over. He would sacrifice Edith to his hot lava.



But just as soon as this realization crossed his mind, his hopes were dashed. As Dylan quietly stalked into her room, his antisocial desires hit a brick wall when he heard Edith’s lustful voice from the dark beckon him. “Dylan.. cough..couch..cough!!! I have been waiting for you. Come here and show me that hard salami hanging between your legs”, she commanded.



Dylan immediately defaulted back into his subordinate-to-women mindset and did what he was told. He walked over to Edith and pulled down his pants and anime undies. Edith reached for him. She firmly gripped his hard member with her hand, then asked, “Is this it?!?” Dylan didn’t even hear what she said. He was zonked out of it by the mere touch of another human being holding his junk. Edith then said, “I wanted a salami, not a goddamned Slim Jim! Oh, well, this will have to do, I guess.”

The two of them spent the rest of the night making sweet GMILF love to one another. It was the best, most meaningful time Dylan had had in his entire life. The mere touch of another human transformed him into one of the human race, and redeemed him from insect-like, brainless leftist zombie he used to be. So desperate for human touch was he, that even the touch of an old, wrinkled whoowah sent a lightning bolt down his spine.



Of course, it was slow-go for a while. Poor Edith eventually had to have a restraining order issued against Dylan. Thereafter, he got a job in a nursing home so that he could been around other old kinky women. But, this old dusty snoot saved Dylan from doing something foolish and cutting his own dick off for the affection of a gross, green haired moron.



Dylan’s political views even began to moderate as he acclimated to being a cooch eater. He even started branching out and dating women under 65 years old. Eventually, he matured and realized that the old chick fetish was not for him. Rather, it was a symptom of how fucked he was. Eventually, he dated within his own age group, married and had a family, and made prudent and thoughtful decisions about life.



Meanwhile, AmandaX met her demise in Gaza at the hands of the same bloodthirsty Jihadists she was there to save. Sylvia was still getting it on with that Alpha male bigfoot (George Floyd) up in the high, dark hill country of western North Carolina. As for Dylan, he was now a divorced, middled age conservative dude who made making a ton of dough, drove a red Corvette, and banged every piece of tail he could!! It took a long time for him to finally come around. But he did, and we are proud of him for it.
 
  • Thread starter
  • Banned
  • #3
Here is the tl;dr for you short-attention span people:

Dylan to cut off dick to be with white, woke woman; his aunt is screwing bigfoot; Dylan gets a taste of geriatric cooch and gains his senses.
 
Here is the tl;dr for you short-attention span people:

Dylan to cut off dick to be with white, woke woman; his aunt is screwing bigfoot; Dylan gets a taste of geriatric cooch and gains his senses.
Thanks. I confess I was intrigued by the first couple of paragraphs but didn't read the whole thing. So a summary is much appreciated. :)
 

Forum List

Back
Top