The children have rights as well, they have diminished capability and we need to seek what's best for them, not the adult.
Yes of course! Children have right . I'm so glad that you brought that up. Here is something that I wrote a while back"
Children are Also Victims When Gay and Lesbian Parents and Potential Parents are Discriminated Against by Progressive Patriot (Undated)
I am decidedly weary people of who use children and child rearing issues as pawns in the failed attempts to derail same sex marriage. Those children, who more than anything, need a stable, secure and loving home have a major stake in the issue. Yet, there are those who persist in claiming that children need a mother and a father to the exclusion of all other considerations in order to assail same sex marriage. They will point to bogus and faulty studies that purportedly show that the developmental and emotional outcomes for children of same sex couples is inferior to that of other children. My purpose here to not to debunk those studies-I have done that elsewhere- but rather to address the fact that regardless of what studies show, it is a ludicrous and logically fallacious argument to make against same sex marriage. In plain English, it makes no sense. It's the wrong argument.
Why? For one thing, people of all kinds will have children, regardless of the ability to marry. In addition, even if the outcomes for children raised in same sex household were in fact different than other children Consider this: If we are to base our policies as to who can marry on who does the best jobs with children, perhaps we should be taking a hard look at certain socio-economic or ethnic groups who produce children who's development and wellbeing can be contrasted to that of other groups . Maybe we should look at inner city vs. suburban parenting outcomes to set marriage policy? Is anyone willing to go there?
And how about this: It is known that Asian American children tend to be higher achievers than non Asians, so maybe we should prohibit marriage by white Americans in order to discourage child rearing since whose children might not do as well.
The fact is that there are a couple of million kids already in the care of gay people and couples. Many are the biological children of a gay person. Those children can benefit greatly if their parent is able to marry and the non-biological parent is able to adopt as a second parent. There are many economic, legal and social benefits to doing so. Not allowing the adults to marry only serves to punish those children and place them at a disadvantage.
In some cases gay people adopt children through agencies. Yes, the idea that gay people can adopt has been way out ahead of gay marriage. My home state of New Jersey has been allowing joint adoption by same sex couples since 1997, the first state to do so. These are children who had NO parents until these gay folks stepped up. Maybe someone would like to compare the long term outcomes for children who grow up as wards of the state with those raised by same sex couples. Gay people can and will adopt children regardless of whether or not the parent(s) can marry so why deprive the children the advantages-discussed above- of having married parent
Lastly, perhaps the smallest number of children who are in the care of gay and lesbian parents are those who were conceived with the use of surrogacy, or artificial insemination. These are children who, arguably would not have been born at all While there are those who may believe that their souls might have otherwise been born into a more advantageous environment, we really don’t know that, What we do know is that those children are real, and once again, those children will benefit from having married parents.
So, I ask. What do we do, even if the highly questionable assertion that gay parenting is inferior is correct? Do we discourage or even prohibit gays from having children in their care? Or do we adapt policies to support them and maximize their ability to care for those children? Do we enact complex policies regarding which groups will be encouraged and which will be discouraged from having children based on some measure of their parenting ability which will, most assuredly be disputed. Or, do we treat everyone equally.
And lastly, I submit to you that yes, it is possible that the number of additional children living with gay parents will increase as the result of same sex marriage
Some will adopt and some will have children with medical/ scientific intervention. But those children, like countless others in the care of gay couples, will have two legal parents who are married. A tremendous advantage. And those adopted children had no parents and the ones who were conceived with help, would not have been born at all
