Someone Humped My Leg

[Samson]

on St. Patrick's Day.

I was in a Bar eating lunch on St. Patrick's day. Only other person at the bar was some girl, cursing and texting.

On my way out I thought I'd leave her with a pleasent, hopeful, thought, "I bet this place is gonna be really full tonight for St. Patrick's Day!!"

She says, "Yeah, and I'm gonna be Leg Humping everybody....girls like it more than guys."

I was too shocked to respond. How base had society become? Was she serious?

Anyway, hours later, after I'd had a few, I returned to the bar to investigate whatever "progress" she may have made.

Within a minute she was Humping MY LEG!!!

VIGOROUSLY!!!

I mean I checked my jeans for holes!!!


Is this the latest 20-something method of greeting? I've heard, with great regret, girls calling each other "bitches," but has civilization's glue completely become undone?

 

[random3434]

Why were you in a bar on St. Patricks Day?

 

[xotoxi]

It's called Lichen Sclerosis.

She had it.

 

[Samson]

Why were you in a bar on St. Patricks Day?

I was in 4 bars on St. Patrick's day between 3 PM and 9 PM.

It was St. Patrick's Day, and I celebrate by visiting 4 bars and drinking a shot of Jameson's in each one.

 

[Luissa]

YOu must have been in Wyomning!

 

[Samson]

It's called Lichen Sclerosis.

She had it.

You've seen this condition? Where?

 

[random3434]

Why were you in a bar on St. Patricks Day?

I was in 4 bars on St. Patrick's day between 3 PM and 9 PM.

It was St. Patrick's Day, and I celebrate by visiting 4 bars and drinking a shot of Jameson's in each one.

Wait.

You're trying to tell me you were in a bar, on St. Patricks Day, drinking?

WTH????????????????

 

[Samson]

YOu must have been in Wyomning!

You knew!!!

 

[xotoxi]

It's called Lichen Sclerosis.

She had it.

You've seen this condition? Where?

Various vulvae.

The women come to me and show me.

 

[Luissa]

Why were you in a bar on St. Patricks Day?

I was in 4 bars on St. Patrick's day between 3 PM and 9 PM.

It was St. Patrick's Day, and I celebrate by visiting 4 bars and drinking a shot of Jameson's in each one.

Wait.

You're trying to tell me you were in a bar, on St. Patricks Day, drinking?

WTH????????????????

And there was a drunk girl hitting on him? The horror!

And I have seen the women in Wyomning, it ain't pretty. They could be a millionaire, but still missing most of their teeth.

 

[Samson]

Why were you in a bar on St. Patricks Day?

I was in 4 bars on St. Patrick's day between 3 PM and 9 PM.

It was St. Patrick's Day, and I celebrate by visiting 4 bars and drinking a shot of Jameson's in each one.

Wait.

You're trying to tell me you were in a bar, on St. Patricks Day, drinking?

WTH????????????????

I couldn't find a girl on a beach with an octopuss draped across her breasts, m'k?

 

[Luissa]

YOu must have been in Wyomning!

You knew!!!

Remember, I have been to Wyomning.
When I was there, it was a man trying to hump my leg, but that is a normal saturday night at the Ponderosa.

 

[Samson]

I was in 4 bars on St. Patrick's day between 3 PM and 9 PM.

It was St. Patrick's Day, and I celebrate by visiting 4 bars and drinking a shot of Jameson's in each one.

Wait.

You're trying to tell me you were in a bar, on St. Patricks Day, drinking?

WTH????????????????

And there was a drunk girl hitting on him? The horror!

And I have seen the women in Wyomning, it ain't pretty. They could be a millionaire, but still missing most of their teeth.

I don't know if she had any teeth in her head, but I swear she left hickys on my knee.

 

[Samson]

YOu must have been in Wyomning!

You knew!!!

Remember, I have been to Wyomning.
When I was there, it was a man trying to hump my leg, but that is a normal saturday night at the Ponderosa.

I wouldn't be shocked if a man humped my leg in Wyoming.

 

[Luissa]

You knew!!!

Remember, I have been to Wyomning.
When I was there, it was a man trying to hump my leg, but that is a normal saturday night at the Ponderosa.

I wouldn't be shocked if a man humped my leg in Wyoming.

So you visit Brokeback, alot?

 

[Samson]

Remember, I have been to Wyomning.
When I was there, it was a man trying to hump my leg, but that is a normal saturday night at the Ponderosa.

I wouldn't be shocked if a man humped my leg in Wyoming.

So you visit Brokeback, alot?

I'm not sure.

Is it near Newcastle?

 

[Luissa]

I wouldn't be shocked if a man humped my leg in Wyoming.

So you visit Brokeback, alot?

I'm not sure.

Is it near Newcastle?

I was refering to the movie.

 

[LuckyDan]

Ambien.

 

[CrimsonWhite]

on St. Patrick's Day.

I was in a Bar eating lunch on St. Patrick's day. Only other person at the bar was some girl, cursing and texting.

On my way out I thought I'd leave her with a pleasent, hopeful, thought, "I bet this place is gonna be really full tonight for St. Patrick's Day!!"

She says, "Yeah, and I'm gonna be Leg Humping everybody....girls like it more than guys."

I was too shocked to respond. How base had society become? Was she serious?

Anyway, hours later, after I'd had a few, I returned to the bar to investigate whatever "progress" she may have made.

Within a minute she was Humping MY LEG!!!

VIGOROUSLY!!!

I mean I checked my jeans for holes!!!


Is this the latest 20-something method of greeting? I've heard, with great regret, girls calling each other "bitches," but has civilization's glue completely become undone?

Was she hot?

 

[Xenophon]

on St. Patrick's Day.

I was in a Bar eating lunch on St. Patrick's day. Only other person at the bar was some girl, cursing and texting.

On my way out I thought I'd leave her with a pleasent, hopeful, thought, "I bet this place is gonna be really full tonight for St. Patrick's Day!!"

She says, "Yeah, and I'm gonna be Leg Humping everybody....girls like it more than guys."

I was too shocked to respond. How base had society become? Was she serious?

Anyway, hours later, after I'd had a few, I returned to the bar to investigate whatever "progress" she may have made.

Within a minute she was Humping MY LEG!!!

VIGOROUSLY!!!

I mean I checked my jeans for holes!!!


Is this the latest 20-something method of greeting? I've heard, with great regret, girls calling each other "bitches," but has civilization's glue completely become undone?

Life at teh gay bar is rough.