iamwhatiseem
Diamond Member
We just returned from visiting Bonzi's mom in NC.
Her brother gave her a DVD he made from a collection of old home movies from their childhood.
Watching them, particularly those from when Bonzi was a teen and older, I kept feeling a profound sadness.
Almost like a death of someone - a loss.
I thought about this, and I believe I know why I felt this. I wasn't there.
Bonzi and I met here in 2016. At age 51 and 52. We are now 58 and 59.
Seeing her young puts an exclamation point to the fact we didn't get that time. All those years of youth. The children we didn't raise. The many memories of holidays, vacations... they do not exist.
On one hand, obviously, I am extraordinarily grateful that we have met, as she is. And yes we are building memories now. But still... man... seeing her young and so full of life that you are when you are young... not easy to see.
I wonder if there are others who experience the same.
Her brother gave her a DVD he made from a collection of old home movies from their childhood.
Watching them, particularly those from when Bonzi was a teen and older, I kept feeling a profound sadness.
Almost like a death of someone - a loss.
I thought about this, and I believe I know why I felt this. I wasn't there.
Bonzi and I met here in 2016. At age 51 and 52. We are now 58 and 59.
Seeing her young puts an exclamation point to the fact we didn't get that time. All those years of youth. The children we didn't raise. The many memories of holidays, vacations... they do not exist.
On one hand, obviously, I am extraordinarily grateful that we have met, as she is. And yes we are building memories now. But still... man... seeing her young and so full of life that you are when you are young... not easy to see.
I wonder if there are others who experience the same.