That's awful. Sorry to hear it. Is this the first time you've mentioned it here? Have you received adequate counseling?
Everyone deals with that sort of thing differently. If you ask most women, they have been abused in this manner by relatives or family friends. Boys, not as much, but it happens. Some of us have scars and some of us move on and forget about it. Some use it as an excuse. I remember smelling that sick **** for days. Never told anyone until I was going through an FBI interview for my security clearance.
The point being, children have no business thinking about sex. If you want to ruin a child....start teaching them about sex when they're under 10.