Moi
Active Member
Subject: The Ant & The Grasshopper
OLD VERSION:
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his
house and laying up supplies for the winter. The
grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the
summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.
The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.
MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself!
MODERN VERSION:
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his
house and laying up supplies for the winter. The
grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the away.
Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a
press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be
warm and well fed while others are cold and
starving.
CBS, NBC, and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering
grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable
home with a table filled with food. America is stunned by the sharp
contrast. How can this be, that in a country of such
wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?
Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody
cries when they sing, "It's Not Easy Being Green."
Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where
the news stations film the group singing, "We shall
overcome." Jesse then has the group kneel down to pray to God for the
grasshopper's sake.
Tom Daschle & John Kerry exclaim in an interview with Peter Jennings
that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the
grasshopper, and both call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make
him pay his "fair share."
Finally, the EEOC drafts the "Economic Equity and Anti-Grasshopper Act,"
retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The
ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs
and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive
taxes, his home is confiscated by the government.
Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a
defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried
before a panel of federal judges that Bill Clinton appointed from a list
of single-parent welfare recipients during his
administration. The ant loses the case.
The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits of
the ant's food while the government house he is in,
which just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him
because he doesn't maintain it.
The ant has disappeared in the snow. The grasshopper is found dead in a
drug related incident and the house, now abandoned,
is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once peaceful
neighborhood.
MORAL OF THE STORY:
Vote Republican
If anyone wants the address of the site, just PM me.
OLD VERSION:
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his
house and laying up supplies for the winter. The
grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the
summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.
The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.
MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself!
MODERN VERSION:
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his
house and laying up supplies for the winter. The
grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the away.
Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a
press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be
warm and well fed while others are cold and
starving.
CBS, NBC, and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering
grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable
home with a table filled with food. America is stunned by the sharp
contrast. How can this be, that in a country of such
wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?
Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody
cries when they sing, "It's Not Easy Being Green."
Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where
the news stations film the group singing, "We shall
overcome." Jesse then has the group kneel down to pray to God for the
grasshopper's sake.
Tom Daschle & John Kerry exclaim in an interview with Peter Jennings
that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the
grasshopper, and both call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make
him pay his "fair share."
Finally, the EEOC drafts the "Economic Equity and Anti-Grasshopper Act,"
retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The
ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs
and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive
taxes, his home is confiscated by the government.
Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a
defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried
before a panel of federal judges that Bill Clinton appointed from a list
of single-parent welfare recipients during his
administration. The ant loses the case.
The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits of
the ant's food while the government house he is in,
which just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him
because he doesn't maintain it.
The ant has disappeared in the snow. The grasshopper is found dead in a
drug related incident and the house, now abandoned,
is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once peaceful
neighborhood.
MORAL OF THE STORY:
Vote Republican
If anyone wants the address of the site, just PM me.