5 round wheels (mostly) a third of most 9mm, stupid to reload, stupid to carry ammo, basically triple the trigger weight pull of a semi auto throwing off aim, usually made with lightweight metals so they have more kick, and J-frames aren’t at all comfortable to shoot. They are over a century old technology. I’ll go back to my car analogy. If your buying your kid or whoever a car, would you want to buy them a classic car without power steering, power breaks, and antilock breaks? No. Yes they can be fun to shoot, and there are some badass looking ones, but they are not as practical.
Also I don’t know how or why your setting up shooting scenarios in your head, following your own rules. You’re not gonna know how a shooting is gonna go down, how far they are, what kind of drop they have on you, how many of them there are, what they’re using, if they’re behind cover, etc. I also don’t know how you know your combat accuracy? Training is way different from actual combat with adrenaline coursing through your veins, causing hands to tremble, heavy breathing, etc. Its a very common them you hear from cops who been involved in shootings that they miss because it’s not at all like it is in the range. Cops and soldiers use A LOT of ammo in a fire fight, because fire superiority usually wins out. You could empty your revolver in a matter of a few seconds, you might be trying to keeping someone’s head behind cover so they can’t pop some shots off at you. I get guys love their revolvers just like some guys are die hard about keeping everything original in their classic car with no power steering or breaks. It’s antiquated tech and there’s no getting around it.
Revolvers are still made in wide varieties by S&W, Colt, Ruger, Taurus, and several other manufacturers, and are widely sold in the USA. Here's why your objections aren't true:
Trigger pull: While the trigger pull of a revolver is higher, it is longer and gets progressively higher. A good quality revolver has a very smooth trigger pull, and is easily handled by an amateur with much less chance of an unintentional discharge. Also consider that many semi-auto pistols have the same double-action pull for the first shot, then a very light pull after. Not very safe for after-the-scenario; the semi-auto stays live where the revolver is by nature back in safe mode.
Capacity: A moot point, since civilian and police encounters average less than three shots. You're right, cops DO tend to use a lot of ammo in some circumstances - but they don't hit anything. Another score for the revolver, at least when the shooter goes berserk the capacity is limited. It's not the first shot or the number of shots that count, it's the first shot that hits. In the case of an extended firefight, a handgun is just a way to fight back to your rifle.
Safety: To ensure a semi-auto pistol cannot fire, one must remove the magazine, rack the slide, and check the chamber. The controls for these operations vary widely. On a revolver you need only open the cylinder, using a clearly obvious latch.
Reliability: While you'd like to think that anyone who carries a weapon routinely services it, that's just not true, and you really don't have to be a "gun nut" to carry a firearm. Simply put, semi-auto pistols don't store well. Springs get weak, lubricants thicken, and the chance of a semi-auto firing more than one shot after even limited storage are very poor. Conversely, a loaded revolver can be put away untouched for decades and still reliably function. Malfunctions also occur even with routine service; when a round fails to fire or feed on a semi-auto, you must stop, pull back the slide (often twice), and hope you can sort it before you are dead. With a revolver you simply maintain position and pull the trigger again.
Revolvers aren't for everyone, but they are the right choice for many, and they are still very useful and popular.