- Sep 22, 2013
- 4,956
- 250
- 85
What does America remind you of (mostly)?
When I think of America, I think of Bob's Big Boy...
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"American movie-stars Tom Cruise and Tom Hanks were working with an Ivy League assistant-professor named Ajay (a gifted linguist from MIT now teaching at Yale) about the modern phenomena of media-engaged political grammar (e.g., The Charlie Rose Show, Rush Limbaugh, etc.). Cruise and Hanks wanted Ajay's help in establishing a special pedestrianism-gauged public forum for consumerism dialogue (e.g., The Wall Street Journal, WikiTravel, NASDAQ, etc.). Cruise, Ajay, and Hanks would form a 'democratic triumvirate'."
"Americans were big fans of CNN and CNN.com, and after 9/11, Americans were cautious about what kinds of public monuments/institutions were now threatened by terrorists. Was it safe to go to a major Starbucks coffee-shop in Washington? Was it safe to eat at the new Burger King fast-food joint in Afghanistan? Were Planet Hollywood restaurant sites suddenly vulnerable to anti-consumerism oriented terrorism? Cruise, Ajay, and Hanks decided to form a special social club for Americans interested in talking liberally and idealistically about links between global consumerism and the defense of personal liberty. After all, a whopper-a-day kept the hairy politicians away..."
"Cruise, Ajay, and Hanks decided to appoint two special etiquette-and-music instructors (Mrs. Hathaway and Mrs. Ghost) to serve as behaviour governesses for their special democratic pedestrianism-critique 'consumerism club' (which now included the celebrities Charlize Theron and Kurt Russell and two U.S. senators!). Mrs. Hathaway and Mrs. Ghost would teach the consumerism club (which Ajay colloquially called 'G.I. Joes' --- an allusion to Hasbro and Marvel's patriotic comic-book franchise) about the mannerisms of America and how best to be 'patriotic and well-behaved shoppers' in this new world of consumerism-oriented consciousness (e.g., eBay, Wall Street, Planet Hollywood, Facebook, etc.). This was the new regime in democratic dialogue, and Hanks called the entire enterprise 'Camp America'."
"American films explored various ideas regarding urbanization, industrialization-related paranoia, gang-related crimes, immigration, capitalism trends, fashion among the rich and poor, and other topics relevant to this new age of commerce-oriented political consciousness (e.g., World Bank, NATO, European Union, Microsoft, etc.). American thespians wanted to be sure that movie-goers got glimpses of all the various faces of sociocultural complexity, including the horrors of 9/11. This was the 'heart' of American society itself."
"As with any good news, there come omens. America's came in the form of a genetically-mutated abomination known as Scorpion (real name: Mac Gargan). Mac was a scientist working for the U.S. government (under the Trump Administration) on a new serum designed to 'enhance' the prosthetics and weaponry on American soldiers during war. However, Mac accidentally ingested the serum and transformed into a giant acid-spewing rubber-metallic giant semi-humanoid insectisoid creature known as Scorpion. Scorpion's main message was that the shadow of Reaganomics would plunge this modern consumerism-centric human civilization into whirlpools of cynicism. Scorpion sought to use terrorism to remind consumers/capitalists of the reality of anti-social angst. Would the 'G.I. Joes' be able to contend with the terrifying Scorpion in this great consumerism-propaganda cause?"
"Many pro-TrumpUSA economics and business students at various respected schools across America (such as Stanford, Duke, Rice, Florida, Notre Dame, and Princeton) were busy studying how developed models of global consumerism would not retrograde Wall Street and the World Bank into some kind of Reaganomics-era catalysed 'over-confidence.' These students were idealistic and hopeful that Cruise, Ajay, and Hanks (and their 'G.I. Joes') would defy the anti-capitalism rhetoric presented by the terrorism-oriented Scorpion. Now that Donald Trump (Jr.) was running for President, would America become a haven for balanced commerce and world-consumerism?"
GOD: Scorpion is to the New America was Hitler was to post-WWII.
SATAN: True; they're both 'ghosts' haunting our optimism.
GOD: Scorpion reminds skeptics of the reality of political angst.
SATAN: The memory of Hitler reminded the world of the reality of anarchy.
GOD: Perhaps the World Bank and the UN can curb the impact of Scorpion.
SATAN: Perhaps the 'G.I. Joes' will be diplomats of this idealism...
GOD: It's difficult gauging capitalism optimism.
SATAN: Yes, and that's because commerce is simply competitive.
GOD: Doesn't the World Bank have valuable ties to the Security Council?
SATAN: The UN tries to coordinate all kinds of 'arms' and 'branches.'
GOD: Let's hope Donald Trump (Jr.) will receive less criticism than his father!
SATAN: Yes, Donald Trump (Sr.) had to deal with many capitalism-naysayers.
GOD: Americans were still grumpy about Reaganomics to be thrilled with Trump (Sr.).
SATAN: Yes, now many critics are citing what they call 'Trumponomics' (inflated investments).
GOD: I just don't want to see Martha Stewart and Ellen DeGeneres remembered as 'nags.'
SATAN: Pluralism-politics is very 'hairy' in the age of media and disclosure...
GOD: Ain't political immaturity embarrassing?
====
When I think of America, I think of Bob's Big Boy...
====
"American movie-stars Tom Cruise and Tom Hanks were working with an Ivy League assistant-professor named Ajay (a gifted linguist from MIT now teaching at Yale) about the modern phenomena of media-engaged political grammar (e.g., The Charlie Rose Show, Rush Limbaugh, etc.). Cruise and Hanks wanted Ajay's help in establishing a special pedestrianism-gauged public forum for consumerism dialogue (e.g., The Wall Street Journal, WikiTravel, NASDAQ, etc.). Cruise, Ajay, and Hanks would form a 'democratic triumvirate'."
"Americans were big fans of CNN and CNN.com, and after 9/11, Americans were cautious about what kinds of public monuments/institutions were now threatened by terrorists. Was it safe to go to a major Starbucks coffee-shop in Washington? Was it safe to eat at the new Burger King fast-food joint in Afghanistan? Were Planet Hollywood restaurant sites suddenly vulnerable to anti-consumerism oriented terrorism? Cruise, Ajay, and Hanks decided to form a special social club for Americans interested in talking liberally and idealistically about links between global consumerism and the defense of personal liberty. After all, a whopper-a-day kept the hairy politicians away..."
"Cruise, Ajay, and Hanks decided to appoint two special etiquette-and-music instructors (Mrs. Hathaway and Mrs. Ghost) to serve as behaviour governesses for their special democratic pedestrianism-critique 'consumerism club' (which now included the celebrities Charlize Theron and Kurt Russell and two U.S. senators!). Mrs. Hathaway and Mrs. Ghost would teach the consumerism club (which Ajay colloquially called 'G.I. Joes' --- an allusion to Hasbro and Marvel's patriotic comic-book franchise) about the mannerisms of America and how best to be 'patriotic and well-behaved shoppers' in this new world of consumerism-oriented consciousness (e.g., eBay, Wall Street, Planet Hollywood, Facebook, etc.). This was the new regime in democratic dialogue, and Hanks called the entire enterprise 'Camp America'."
"American films explored various ideas regarding urbanization, industrialization-related paranoia, gang-related crimes, immigration, capitalism trends, fashion among the rich and poor, and other topics relevant to this new age of commerce-oriented political consciousness (e.g., World Bank, NATO, European Union, Microsoft, etc.). American thespians wanted to be sure that movie-goers got glimpses of all the various faces of sociocultural complexity, including the horrors of 9/11. This was the 'heart' of American society itself."
"As with any good news, there come omens. America's came in the form of a genetically-mutated abomination known as Scorpion (real name: Mac Gargan). Mac was a scientist working for the U.S. government (under the Trump Administration) on a new serum designed to 'enhance' the prosthetics and weaponry on American soldiers during war. However, Mac accidentally ingested the serum and transformed into a giant acid-spewing rubber-metallic giant semi-humanoid insectisoid creature known as Scorpion. Scorpion's main message was that the shadow of Reaganomics would plunge this modern consumerism-centric human civilization into whirlpools of cynicism. Scorpion sought to use terrorism to remind consumers/capitalists of the reality of anti-social angst. Would the 'G.I. Joes' be able to contend with the terrifying Scorpion in this great consumerism-propaganda cause?"
"Many pro-TrumpUSA economics and business students at various respected schools across America (such as Stanford, Duke, Rice, Florida, Notre Dame, and Princeton) were busy studying how developed models of global consumerism would not retrograde Wall Street and the World Bank into some kind of Reaganomics-era catalysed 'over-confidence.' These students were idealistic and hopeful that Cruise, Ajay, and Hanks (and their 'G.I. Joes') would defy the anti-capitalism rhetoric presented by the terrorism-oriented Scorpion. Now that Donald Trump (Jr.) was running for President, would America become a haven for balanced commerce and world-consumerism?"
GOD: Scorpion is to the New America was Hitler was to post-WWII.
SATAN: True; they're both 'ghosts' haunting our optimism.
GOD: Scorpion reminds skeptics of the reality of political angst.
SATAN: The memory of Hitler reminded the world of the reality of anarchy.
GOD: Perhaps the World Bank and the UN can curb the impact of Scorpion.
SATAN: Perhaps the 'G.I. Joes' will be diplomats of this idealism...
GOD: It's difficult gauging capitalism optimism.
SATAN: Yes, and that's because commerce is simply competitive.
GOD: Doesn't the World Bank have valuable ties to the Security Council?
SATAN: The UN tries to coordinate all kinds of 'arms' and 'branches.'
GOD: Let's hope Donald Trump (Jr.) will receive less criticism than his father!
SATAN: Yes, Donald Trump (Sr.) had to deal with many capitalism-naysayers.
GOD: Americans were still grumpy about Reaganomics to be thrilled with Trump (Sr.).
SATAN: Yes, now many critics are citing what they call 'Trumponomics' (inflated investments).
GOD: I just don't want to see Martha Stewart and Ellen DeGeneres remembered as 'nags.'
SATAN: Pluralism-politics is very 'hairy' in the age of media and disclosure...
GOD: Ain't political immaturity embarrassing?
====
