The New Marriage

Discussion in 'Current Events' started by _dmp_, Mar 8, 2004.

  1. _dmp_
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    _dmp_ Member

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    Subject: FW: The New Marriage


    A scene at San Francisco City Hall .

    "Next."

    "Good morning. We want to apply for a marriage license."

    "Names?"

    "Tim and Jim Jones."

    "Jones? Are you related? I see a resemblance."

    "Yes, we're brothers."

    "Brothers? You can't get married."

    "Why not? Aren't you giving marriage licenses to same gender couples?"

    "Yes, thousands. But we haven't had any siblings. That's incest!"

    "Incest? No, we are not gay."

    "Not gay? Then why do you want to get married?"

    "For the financial benefits, of course. And we do love each other.
    Besides, we don't have any other prospects."

    "But we're issuing marriage licenses to gay and lesbian couples who've been
    denied equal protection under the law. If you are not gay, you can get
    married to a woman."

    "Wait a minute. A gay man has the same right to marry a woman as I have.
    But just because I'm straight doesn't mean I want to marry a woman. I want
    to marry Jim."

    "And I want to marry Tim, Are you going to discriminate against us just
    because we are not gay?"

    "All right, all right. I'll give you your license. Next."

    "Hi. We are here to get married."

    "Names?"

    "John Smith, Jane James, Robert Green, and June Johnson."

    "Who wants to marry whom?"

    "We all want to marry each other."

    "But there are four of you!"

    "That's right. You see, we're all bisexual. I love Jane and Robert, Jane
    loves me and June, June loves Robert and Jane, and Robert loves June and
    me. All of us getting married together is the only way that we can express
    our sexual preferences in a marital relationship."

    "But we've only been granting licenses to gay and lesbian couples."

    "So you're discriminating against bisexuals!"

    "No, it's just that, well, the traditional idea of marriage is that it's
    just for couples."

    "Since when are you standing on tradition?"

    "Well, I mean, you have to draw the line somewhere."

    "Who says? There's no logical reason to limit marriage to couples. The
    more the better. Besides, we demand our rights! The mayor says the
    constitution guarantees equal protection under the law. Give us a marriage
    license!"

    "All right, all right. Next."

    "Hello, I'd like a marriage license."

    "In what names?"

    "David Deets."

    "And the other man?"

    "That's all. I want to marry myself."

    "Marry yourself? What do you mean?"

    "Well, my psychiatrist says I have a dual personality, so I want to marry
    the two together. Maybe I can file a joint income-tax return."

    "That does it! I quit!! You people are making a mockery of marriage!!"
     
  2. William Joyce
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    William Joyce Chemotherapy for PC

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    Homosexuals who actually gave a damn about a stable society would oppose gay marriage.
     
  3. jon_forward
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    jon_forward Active Member

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    :laugh: :laugh: this should have been in humor....:clap: but Darrin you do have a point...well taken
     
  4. Moi
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    Moi Active Member

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    It should be in the sick to your stomach forum. It's making me ill- because of the truth of it!
     
  5. jimnyc
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    jimnyc ...

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    Those in favor of gay marriage can deny it until they turn blue, but this is exactly the can of worms that will be opened. Very sad.
     
  6. wonderwench
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    If you really think that gays being able to marry will cause the breakdown of the family structure, then it isn't a stable insitution.

    Something that fragile is doomed. Fortunately, your fears are misplaced. Heterosexual, non-related males and females are not going to stop being attracted to each other, marrying and having children. Anyone who thinks that gay civil unions will destroy his own marriage has far deeper self-identity issues.
     
  7. jimnyc
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    jimnyc ...

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    I think the point of this thread flew right over your head. It's not going to change the way a heterosexual feels. It very well may change the way father/daughter, brother/sister, brother/brother, polygamists and other people in relationships feel about marriage. They'll sure have a hell of an argument based on equal rights should the queers succeed.
     
  8. wonderwench
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    The point did not go over my head. I do not believe the sky is falling. Do you really think family structures are so insecure that is gays are able to marry, that you yourself will want to marry your father?

    Get a grip.
     
  9. jimnyc
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    jimnyc ...

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    Again, over your head!!

    I said NOTHING about me. I said those already in those deviant relationships will now have grounds to apply for their own so called 'equal rights'.

    Read first.
    Then comprehend.
    Then reply.
     
  10. Moi
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    Moi Active Member

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    Regardless of your thoughts on gay marriage, there is no justification for limiting this open marriage scenario just to gays. Sisters, brothers, fathers, sons, daughters, etc. should then be able to marry. Since when is marriage limited to love? Marriages are made for all kinds of reasons.

    In fact, I should think the INS rules regarding marriage to non-citizens should be thrown away too. People from another country should be able to pay someone here to marry them so that they can become citizens.

    After all, marriage is just about property rights according to the gays.
     

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