The Mindless Thread

[App'z]

Yes, I got a boing headache coming. We don all this shit Decades ago. No new news just Billions of crap dollars blown.

MSN

 

[App'z]

sh Girls rules apply only to the winners!

MSN

 

[App'z]

So. we have Far Right Repubs. and Far left Dems.

Fascists versus Socialists. Elephants vs. Mules. RINO's & DINO's

It's clear we need a middle of the road party, one that expresses The Will of the peoples. Freedom and the Constitution + Amendments.

The Poisonous "Snakes." The symbol a coiled Rattler.

Clearly the Party with the most votes in congress gets the Speakership and Senate Majority Leader chairs.
The middle of the Roaders.
A bunch of Coiled "Snakes!"

 

[g5000]

I've been a horndog all my life.

I kissed my first girl when we were both nine years old, in a closet under the stairs of my house. She was a milk white Irish lass named Maureen. Her family moved away a short time later. Broke my heart.

Nine years later, I'm home on leave from the service and I meet up with my high school buddies for a drink at a live rock bar. We order drinks, and a few minutes later, a pale hand places my drink next to me. I immediately knew it was Maureen.

So anyway, I spent many years boinking every female who cast a shadow. Boobs weren't important to me. I've had women with mosquito bites for breasts and a bartender whose boobs were bigger than her head. None of that mattered to me.

Strangely enough, I've never been with a woman with implants. I have no idea what implanted breasts feel like, but I've seen them in porn and they do not look attractive at all. They look stupid, and they get weird dents in the sides when the woman is on her hands and knees.

I've sometimes thought of finding a woman with implants and asking her if she'll let me play with them. I'm really curious.

One of my favorite sexual acts is to perform oral sex on a woman. I just love, love, love doing this. Whenever a woman completes oral sex on me, I always shout, "MY TURN!" as I dive in, which always elicits laughter from them.

I've been with every sort of woman. One time, I was so whiskey drunk, I had sex in my barracks room with a black girl with cornrows who was wider than my twin bed. I kid you not. Waves were rippling up and down her body as I boinked away like a lunatic. I guess I went a little overboard because something ruptured in her and she bled all the way through my bedspread, the blanket, and both sheets all the way to the mattress. She left in a hurry and the next day her best friend called me really pissed off to tell me she was in the hospital.

After a few decades of this excessive boinking, people started telling me I should seek counseling since this kind of heterosexual behavior was no longer acceptable in the new American paradigm, and a certain therapist was recommended.

She had long gray hair in a tight bun, crumbs of granola on her tie-dye shirt, and the smell of patchouli oil about her. I knew I was in the right place. She was hot!

After several years and tens of thousands of dollars, hanging out in drum circles for eight seasons, and learning how to macrame, my shrink gently coaxed me with logic and reason to accept my real identity.

Under this new leftist regime we find ourselves in America, it appears I am a lesbian trapped in a man's body. Fortunately, no surgery is required at this time, but that may change if Biden is re-elected.

I have received the obligatory rainbow flag in the mail, along with a contract requiring me to make pilgrimages to an LGBTQ+ festival at least once every five years, and I have to buy a Subaru.

I'm a little nervous about outing myself to my family.

 

[App'z]

^ ^ J. H. C. ..... that's sick ! Sweetheart bring the vape in your bra closer.

 

[App'z]

A duck hunter was out enjoying a nice morning on the marsh when he decided to take a leak....
He walked over to a tree and propped up his gun.
Just then a gust of wind blew, the gun fell over, and discharged...
shooting him in the genitals.
Several hours later, lying in a hospital bed,
he was approached by his doctor.
"Well sir, I have some good news and some bad news.
The good news is that you are going to be OK.
The damage was local to your groin, there was very little internal damage,
and we were able to remove all of the buckshot."
"What's the bad news?" asked the hunter.
"The bad news is that there was some pretty extensive buckshot damage done to your *****.
I'm going to have to refer you to my sister."
"Oh, well I guess that isn't too bad," the hunter replied.
"Is your sister a plastic Surgeon ?
Not exactly," answered the doctor.
"She's a flute player in the local symphony and
she's going to teach you where to put your fingers so you don't piss in your face !

 

[App'z]

MSN

 

[App'z]

Please let me explain, You got Millions of Golf balls that are One washed great buys and Golf POC have just cost you $$$millions!

MSN

 

[App'z]

Did you sleep well last night? Its New Years eve.
Happy New Years Eve.

 

[App'z]

I think I been thru worser January 1sts.
If you think it's been tougher, raise our hands.
Then let's put all our hands together and hold em tight.

 

[App'z]

Charlie's the old piece of lasso & he steps into a bar one day for a drink.
Bartender looks at him suspiciously and says, "Hey, Pal, we don't serve ropes here."
Charlie steps outside, ties himself into a clove hitch and unravels one of his ends
into a mess. He goes back inside, orders in a low voice, "Beer, please."
Bartender says, "Hey. aren't you that rope who was just in here?"
Charlie responds, "No, I'm a frayed knot."

 

[App'z]

Two detectives are on the 9 hole at the Pro golf course.
They responded to a call about a guy laying on his own Tee.
So the detectives begin their investigation of the death of Juan Gonzalez.
"How do you think he was killed ?", asks one detective.
The other detective replies, "with a golf gun".
"A golf gun, what on earth is a golf gun ?"
"I'm not sure but it sure made a hole in Juan"

 

[App'z]

Two Identical Twin Brothers who haven't seen each other for years
are at the Family reunion. One asks, "is Mindy still as lovely as when
you first met." The other Brother says, "Yeah Mindy's great, but it
takes her a couple hours longer."

 

[App'z]

Most likely the worst holiday season of my life passed. Yea!
You go baby girl 2024! bring in the light.

 

[App'z]

 

[App'z]

You're 60 Ish, been thru tons of treatments, hospital stays, Botox injections, you name it, your private Beauticians says they can't help anymore, what ya supposed to do? Give up?

reminds us of God telling her he didn't recognize her anymore when it came to immortality!

 

[App'z]

Adduction is when you put a Duck in a Pond.

Seduction is when you observe the duck in the pond.

Reduction is when you remove the duck from the pond.

Production is when the pond has baby ducks swimming.

 

[App'z]

Woops nobody taught me to Delete dat.

 

[App'z]

MSN

The Man did his Duty. Like it or not it was a sworn duty to the USA Constitution.
It ends here. As he said, the state counts and sends its sworn count to Congress.
The duty to count those Electoral College votes are Congress. His was to preside in open congress business. No one had the right to interfere under the Constitution.
Other than to enter an objection that the congress could take under advisements and then possibly vote on. Obviously, Congress move forward and selected a POTUS, most likely not the best one in History given what we the people have endured, depending on what has happened to us. The Point. No one had the right to stop Congress moving forward.

 

[App'z]