The Life Of An Alcoholic

[ChrisL]

.... from one perspective....

- when you are an alcoholic, it's the only thing you look forward to - having your drink(s).....

When you don't have that to look forward to, life is just getting through the day, and unless you have a "substitute" or something to replace that one thing you look forward to, there is not much meaning to life.

Maybe it's possible that for some people, alcohol is the answer for them. Instead of trying to make everyone fit in and be normal.

This can be said of other addictions as well.......

I think that's totally normal, Bonzi. I've talked to people trying to quit smoking before who have said the same or similar things. I've heard people say that they usually smoke during coffee breaks at work and looked forward to it, and now they don't know what to do with themselves. I think after some time, that boredom and feeling as if something is missing from your day will subside. Keep your chin up. Stick with it!

I was like that with smoking also, but, seemed different some how.....
I think with age, as the things you enjoy in life get taken away, depression sets in.
It's a state of mind, I understand, but, you have to have the fight and the will......

I appreciate your kind and encouraging words however, very sweet....

I don't want to lecture, so I'll just say that I wish the best of luck to you.

 

[Bonzi]

.... from one perspective....

- when you are an alcoholic, it's the only thing you look forward to - having your drink(s).....

When you don't have that to look forward to, life is just getting through the day, and unless you have a "substitute" or something to replace that one thing you look forward to, there is not much meaning to life.

Maybe it's possible that for some people, alcohol is the answer for them. Instead of trying to make everyone fit in and be normal.

This can be said of other addictions as well.......

I am an addiction counselor

This is where addiction doesn't care who you are, what party that you belong to,or how rich you are.

Whatever the addiction, it starts in the reward center of the brain, releasing feel good hormones into the body.
Meth releases the most feel good hormones so it brings the person down the fastest.

Food,shopping , drugs alcohol, gambling, sports, smoking ect. all reward us .

A fat person judging a drunk or a smoker do not realize that they have an addiction too, visa versa.

A rehap, or a support group like AA, feeds the brain with tools to help, because the brain has changed, relapse can happen anytime for the rest of their life's.

Oh I know - I have other mental blocks that makes it very hard for me to be part of any support group.
Namely, people really don't care deep down inside..... and I don't need encouragement, it doesn't work for me.

 

[Delta4Embassy]

.... from one perspective....

- when you are an alcoholic, it's the only thing you look forward to - having your drink(s).....

When you don't have that to look forward to, life is just getting through the day, and unless you have a "substitute" or something to replace that one thing you look forward to, there is not much meaning to life.

Maybe it's possible that for some people, alcohol is the answer for them. Instead of trying to make everyone fit in and be normal.

This can be said of other addictions as well.......

Vanilla I use for cookies is 41% alcohol. Just saying. If ever hard up it's basically strong vanilla schnapps.

you're such a good influence! dang Delta!

Well they already know about mouthwash, but you're not supposed to swallow that for the otheringrediants. Least vanilla's made to be consumed.

 

[chikenwing]

Alcoholics go to meetings, so I'm just a functional drunk.

When you can't function without alcohol, you have a problem that you need help with.

I once worked with a dude who would tremble in the morning until he had a beer.

His coffee cup never had coffee in it.

I don't find meetings helpful. People can't solve your problems, and I don't need a shoulder to cry on.
Drinking is fun and makes you feel good -
Counseling also is no good unless you are willing to put in the work.....

You can have a PHYSICAL addiction to alcohol -
You can also have a PSYCHOLOGICAL addiction - very different things.

I view my addiction more like a divorce from someone you really love......

I have gone too meetings with my wife,frankly they piss me off,and that's my problem,I still have a hard time seeing my once sharp on the ball partner,hanging with a bunch of stupids,but if that's what it takes for her not to drink,I have to be patient

 

[Eaglewings]

.... from one perspective....

- when you are an alcoholic, it's the only thing you look forward to - having your drink(s).....

When you don't have that to look forward to, life is just getting through the day, and unless you have a "substitute" or something to replace that one thing you look forward to, there is not much meaning to life.

Maybe it's possible that for some people, alcohol is the answer for them. Instead of trying to make everyone fit in and be normal.

This can be said of other addictions as well.......

Vanilla I use for cookies is 41% alcohol. Just saying. If ever hard up it's basically strong vanilla schnapps.

you're such a good influence! dang Delta!

Well they already know about mouthwash, but you're not supposed to swallow that for the otheringrediants. Least vanilla's made to be consumed.

Have you seen on intervention the people addicted to mouthwash, rubbing alcohol...? Very sad.

 

[Bonzi]

.... from one perspective....

- when you are an alcoholic, it's the only thing you look forward to - having your drink(s).....

When you don't have that to look forward to, life is just getting through the day, and unless you have a "substitute" or something to replace that one thing you look forward to, there is not much meaning to life.

Maybe it's possible that for some people, alcohol is the answer for them. Instead of trying to make everyone fit in and be normal.

This can be said of other addictions as well.......

Vanilla I use for cookies is 41% alcohol. Just saying. If ever hard up it's basically strong vanilla schnapps.

you're such a good influence! dang Delta!

Well they already know about mouthwash, but you're not supposed to swallow that for the otheringrediants. Least vanilla's made to be consumed.

Have you seen on intervention the people addicted to mouthwash, rubbing alcohol...? Very sad.

that's a different type of alcohol so I'm told. I have head of people drinking perfume as well.
I'm not that far gone. I'm not climbing the walls, I just miss what I used to look forward to and there is nothing to replace it. Pretty lame dilemma compared to most -

 

[Eaglewings]

Alcoholics go to meetings, so I'm just a functional drunk.

When you can't function without alcohol, you have a problem that you need help with.

I once worked with a dude who would tremble in the morning until he had a beer.

His coffee cup never had coffee in it.

I don't find meetings helpful. People can't solve your problems, and I don't need a shoulder to cry on.
Drinking is fun and makes you feel good -
Counseling also is no good unless you are willing to put in the work.....

You can have a PHYSICAL addiction to alcohol -
You can also have a PSYCHOLOGICAL addiction - very different things.

I view my addiction more like a divorce from someone you really love......

I have gone too meetings with my wife,frankly they piss me off,and that's my problem,I still have a hard time seeing my once sharp on the ball partner,hanging with a bunch of stupids,but if that's what it takes for her not to drink,I have to be patient

I couldn't connect to AA for years and then for me lights came on and I got it.

Anything to feed the conscious ( able to control) part of the brain to keep the subconscious ( unable to control ) part of the brain sober tools is the key, some don't need support groups some have to sit in meetings all day.
Some relapse after 30 + years and die from an overdose.

 

[Delta4Embassy]

.... from one perspective....

- when you are an alcoholic, it's the only thing you look forward to - having your drink(s).....

When you don't have that to look forward to, life is just getting through the day, and unless you have a "substitute" or something to replace that one thing you look forward to, there is not much meaning to life.

Maybe it's possible that for some people, alcohol is the answer for them. Instead of trying to make everyone fit in and be normal.

This can be said of other addictions as well.......

Vanilla I use for cookies is 41% alcohol. Just saying. If ever hard up it's basically strong vanilla schnapps.

you're such a good influence! dang Delta!

Well they already know about mouthwash, but you're not supposed to swallow that for the otheringrediants. Least vanilla's made to be consumed.

Have you seen on intervention the people addicted to mouthwash, rubbing alcohol...? Very sad.

that's a different type of alcohol so I'm told. I have head of people drinking perfume as well.
I'm not that far gone. I'm not climbing the walls, I just miss what I used to look forward to and there is nothing to replace it. Pretty lame dilemma compared to most -

It is, but if you dilute it with juice or something it'll work where an alcoholic is concerned. Ruins your insides, but it'll stave off withdrawl until it kills you.

 

[depotoo]

Mundane only if you allow that mind set. You need to find other things to occupy the time you would sit to drink. Take up exercise, painting, whatever will help occupy the mind, even for just moments at a time. From what I have seen with those I have known, rather than one day at a time, in the beginning it is one moment at a time.

.... from one perspective....

- when you are an alcoholic, it's the only thing you look forward to - having your drink(s).....

When you don't have that to look forward to, life is just getting through the day, and unless you have a "substitute" or something to replace that one thing you look forward to, there is not much meaning to life.

Maybe it's possible that for some people, alcohol is the answer for them. Instead of trying to make everyone fit in and be normal.

This can be said of other addictions as well.......

If one is an alcoholic,more is never the correct route ever.It will only lead to more problems and death at some point.

Understood. But a boring mundane life fighting off temptation is better?

 

[depotoo]

Also, remove yourself from the usual setting.
Oh, and good luck. Your family will thank you for it.

 

[TrinityPower]

.... from one perspective....

- when you are an alcoholic, it's the only thing you look forward to - having your drink(s).....

When you don't have that to look forward to, life is just getting through the day, and unless you have a "substitute" or something to replace that one thing you look forward to, there is not much meaning to life.

Maybe it's possible that for some people, alcohol is the answer for them. Instead of trying to make everyone fit in and be normal.

This can be said of other addictions as well.......

I am an addiction counselor

This is where addiction doesn't care who you are, what party that you belong to,or how rich you are.

Whatever the addiction, it starts in the reward center of the brain, releasing feel good hormones into the body.
Meth releases the most feel good hormones so it brings the person down the fastest.

Food,shopping , drugs alcohol, gambling, sports, smoking ect. all reward us .

A fat person judging a drunk or a smoker do not realize that they have an addiction too, visa versa.

A rehap, or a support group like AA, feeds the brain with tools to help, because the brain has changed, relapse can happen anytime for the rest of their life's.

We need to start treating drug addicts instead of just punishing them.

About alcohol, I was married to an abusive alcohol who had not drunk in almost 30 years. Its very very possible to be a dry drunk - have all the behaviors of a wet drunk while supposedly sober.

I was married to someone like that as well. Never drank but behaved like an angry drunk all the time. I had emotional issues from living with an alcoholic father and thought I married someone unlike that because he didn't drink but he was worse. I internalize a lot and the high stress of living that way for such a long time manifested itself in my body with an auto immune disease called Rheumatoid Arthritis. The stress someone who has an addiction causes others is difficult to describe, they think that the problem they have only concerns themselves as they are the ones doing what they do to themselves but it ripples out in destruction to everyone around them especially ones in the household. People deal with it in different ways. Those who internalize and have no real outlet often end up with an auto immune disorder from high octane stress levels

 

[Ernie S.]

.... from one perspective....

- when you are an alcoholic, it's the only thing you look forward to - having your drink(s).....

When you don't have that to look forward to, life is just getting through the day, and unless you have a "substitute" or something to replace that one thing you look forward to, there is not much meaning to life.

Maybe it's possible that for some people, alcohol is the answer for them. Instead of trying to make everyone fit in and be normal.

This can be said of other addictions as well.......

I think that's totally normal, Bonzi. I've talked to people trying to quit smoking before who have said the same or similar things. I've heard people say that they usually smoke during coffee breaks at work and looked forward to it, and now they don't know what to do with themselves. I think after some time, that boredom and feeling as if something is missing from your day will subside. Keep your chin up. Stick with it!

I was like that with smoking also, but, seemed different some how.....
I think with age, as the things you enjoy in life get taken away, depression sets in.
It's a state of mind, I understand, but, you have to have the fight and the will......

I appreciate your kind and encouraging words however, very sweet....

Quitting cigarettes is far more difficult than quitting drinking was for me.
The drinking... well it was easy to see what it was doing to me. I was a physical, mental, emotional and financial mess.
The physical problems ended in a month. The rest took longer, but the support I got from AA got me through the worst trauma a parent can endure without getting drunk just short of a year after quitting.

 

[Bonzi]

.... from one perspective....

- when you are an alcoholic, it's the only thing you look forward to - having your drink(s).....

When you don't have that to look forward to, life is just getting through the day, and unless you have a "substitute" or something to replace that one thing you look forward to, there is not much meaning to life.

Maybe it's possible that for some people, alcohol is the answer for them. Instead of trying to make everyone fit in and be normal.

This can be said of other addictions as well.......

I am an addiction counselor

This is where addiction doesn't care who you are, what party that you belong to,or how rich you are.

Whatever the addiction, it starts in the reward center of the brain, releasing feel good hormones into the body.
Meth releases the most feel good hormones so it brings the person down the fastest.

Food,shopping , drugs alcohol, gambling, sports, smoking ect. all reward us .

A fat person judging a drunk or a smoker do not realize that they have an addiction too, visa versa.

A rehap, or a support group like AA, feeds the brain with tools to help, because the brain has changed, relapse can happen anytime for the rest of their life's.

We need to start treating drug addicts instead of just punishing them.

About alcohol, I was married to an abusive alcohol who had not drunk in almost 30 years. Its very very possible to be a dry drunk - have all the behaviors of a wet drunk while supposedly sober.

I was married to someone like that as well. Never drank but behaved like an angry drunk all the time. I had emotional issues from living with an alcoholic father and thought I married someone unlike that because he didn't drink but he was worse. I internalize a lot and the high stress of living that way for such a long time manifested itself in my body with an auto immune disease called Rheumatoid Arthritis. The stress someone who has an addiction causes others is difficult to describe, they think that the problem they have only concerns themselves as they are the ones doing what they do to themselves but it ripples out in destruction to everyone around them especially ones in the household. People deal with it in different ways. Those who internalize and have no real outlet often end up with an auto immune disorder from high octane stress levels

I'm not angry.
I put on a happy face.

 

[Bonzi]

Also, remove yourself from the usual setting.
Oh, and good luck. Your family will thank you for it.

Oh they are happy. I'm not.

 

[depotoo]

My parents went through a period of drinking heavily in the evenings after my grandfather committed suicide. I was 9 years old. I remember to this day, the fear driving with them, thinking I could do better than they were after leaving the golf club. The verbal fights it would lead into, with threats of divorce, etc. They apologized years later, but it did not lessen the memories. People that drink too much just do not begin to recognize what it does to loved ones around them.

Also, remove yourself from the usual setting.
Oh, and good luck. Your family will thank you for it.

Oh they are happy. I'm not.

 

[Bonzi]

Well if I were to decide my drinking was more important than anything, I would not subject anyone else to it.

Not unless they knew the deal and agreed to live with it....

 

[depotoo]

Their drinking wasn't more important, in their eyes, either. It was erasing the pain and allowed them to be blind to how it affected us kids. They still got us up and ready for school, fed us, dressed us, dad continued to make us a good living, etc., but emotionally they were detached, and blind to its effects on us, at the time.

Well if I were to decide my drinking was more important than anything, I would not subject anyone else to it.

Not unless they knew the deal and agreed to live with it....

 

[Bonzi]

Their drinking wasn't more important, in their eyes, either. It was erasing the pain and allowed them to be blind to how it affected us kids. They still got us up and ready for school, fed us, dressed us, dad continued to make us a good living, etc., but emotionally they were detached, and blind to its effects on us, at the time.

Well if I were to decide my drinking was more important than anything, I would not subject anyone else to it.

Not unless they knew the deal and agreed to live with it....

Fortunately, my kids are grown and successful on their own.
I'm not advocating drinking and ruining lives around you.
I'm just saying sometimes, it's the best choice for you, but, you do need to distance yourself from others. It's not fair to them - children or adults....

 

[depotoo]

And distancing yourself to drink isn't fair to them either.

Their drinking wasn't more important, in their eyes, either. It was erasing the pain and allowed them to be blind to how it affected us kids. They still got us up and ready for school, fed us, dressed us, dad continued to make us a good living, etc., but emotionally they were detached, and blind to its effects on us, at the time.

Well if I were to decide my drinking was more important than anything, I would not subject anyone else to it.

Not unless they knew the deal and agreed to live with it....

Fortunately, my kids are grown and successful on their own.
I'm not advocating drinking and ruining lives around you.
I'm just saying sometimes, it's the best choice for you, but, you do need to distance yourself from others. It's not fair to them - children or adults....

 

[Bonzi]

And distancing yourself to drink isn't fair to them either.

Their drinking wasn't more important, in their eyes, either. It was erasing the pain and allowed them to be blind to how it affected us kids. They still got us up and ready for school, fed us, dressed us, dad continued to make us a good living, etc., but emotionally they were detached, and blind to its effects on us, at the time.

Well if I were to decide my drinking was more important than anything, I would not subject anyone else to it.

Not unless they knew the deal and agreed to live with it....

Fortunately, my kids are grown and successful on their own.
I'm not advocating drinking and ruining lives around you.
I'm just saying sometimes, it's the best choice for you, but, you do need to distance yourself from others. It's not fair to them - children or adults....

If the care about your happiness it is.
If died tomorrow, life would go on.
Since when did making a decision on how to live your life become "selfish"?
If I decided I wanted to become homeless and drink myself to oblivion, it may (or may not) hurt others, but, if I decided to become a missionary and put my life in danger in an unsafe country that is OK?