Teen Mothers and Adoption

[dilloduck]

Bristol was already on DWTS.

We wouldn't want any single mothers to think they too could be happy and dance and stuff.

I am not saying she shouldn't have been on the show, but she is a terrible role model. 99.9% of teen mothers are not going to be on DWTS. Just sayin!

I know it is hard for you right wingers, but sometimes these teen need to be shown the reality and not filled full of bullshit. Some want to cut sex ed, but want Bristol Palin has a spokesperson, sounds like a good idea to me.

I guess we're back to an election or a popularity contest.

 

[Luissa]

After reading the train wreck that is the Bristol Palin thread and her being a spokesperson for teen motherhood, it made me wonder......

Wouldn't it have been better if they chose a teen that gave her baby up for adoption?

Now I know Bristol Palin has a lot of family support and money to help her care for her child, but most teens don't.

So.........................

Seems to me a girl who is in her teens and not ready to take up the responsibility of teen motherhood and doesn't want to abort her baby would consider giving up her baby for adoption.

There are many families out there waiting to be parents. I know first hand, my brother and his wife adopted 2 children because my SIL had Lupus and couldn't have children. One of my best friends adopted a boy a few years ago and has been on the waiting list for another child.

What do you think?

I'm a big fan of teen moms putting kids up for adoption because I was a kid born to a teenage mom who put me up for adoption. My parents - the people who adopted me - were great parents. My biological mother and her family - nice people in many ways- are train wrecks. I consider myself to have won the lottery of life having been given up for adoption.

My brothers feel pretty lucky too. They don't even want to find their biological family, my one brother did when he was younger, but he decided he didn't want to after a while.
My aunts son found her a year and half ago, and it was great. She is actually very involved in his life now, and we even all got to meet him. Her life would have been completely different if she had kept him, for one it was the 60s.

 

[Luissa]

We wouldn't want any single mothers to think they too could be happy and dance and stuff.

I am not saying she shouldn't have been on the show, but she is a terrible role model. 99.9% of teen mothers are not going to be on DWTS. Just sayin!

I know it is hard for you right wingers, but sometimes these teen need to be shown the reality and not filled full of bullshit. Some want to cut sex ed, but want Bristol Palin has a spokesperson, sounds like a good idea to me.

I guess we're back to an election or a popularity contest.

What are you even talking about?
It has nothing to do with popularity and everything to do with sending children a TRUTHFUL message.

 

[dilloduck]

I am not saying she shouldn't have been on the show, but she is a terrible role model. 99.9% of teen mothers are not going to be on DWTS. Just sayin!

I know it is hard for you right wingers, but sometimes these teen need to be shown the reality and not filled full of bullshit. Some want to cut sex ed, but want Bristol Palin has a spokesperson, sounds like a good idea to me.

I guess we're back to an election or a popularity contest.

What are you even talking about?
It has nothing to do with popularity and everything to do with sending children a TRUTHFUL message.

And exactly what is the truth ? Teen mothers run the entire gamut from worthless to great. Do you really think they are all planning to be on DWTS ?

 

[Luissa]

I guess we're back to an election or a popularity contest.

What are you even talking about?
It has nothing to do with popularity and everything to do with sending children a TRUTHFUL message.

And exactly what is the truth ? Teen mothers run the entire gamut from worthless to great. Do you really think they are all planning to be on DWTS ?

Some might, after seeing Bristol or something like it. Her life says, that even though you are a teen mom you can still be rich. Has she even gone to college at all?
In reality a teen mom is probably never going to be rich, her kids father isn't going to be in Playgirl, and she wont be rewarded for acting like a brat.

When they wanted to scare teens about meth us here they didn't get some glamorous celebrity who had done meth. They put some white trash meth heads picture on the campaign, with meth bites and all. That is reality. Being poor, living pay check to pay check with a kid's father who doesn't contribute or is a loser is reality.

 

[Anguille]

After reading the train wreck that is the Bristol Palin thread and her being a spokesperson for teen motherhood, it made me wonder......

Wouldn't it have been better if they chose a teen that gave her baby up for adoption?

Now I know Bristol Palin has a lot of family support and money to help her care for her child, but most teens don't.

So.........................

Seems to me a girl who is in her teens and not ready to take up the responsibility of teen motherhood and doesn't want to abort her baby would consider giving up her baby for adoption.

There are many families out there waiting to be parents. I know first hand, my brother and his wife adopted 2 children because my SIL had Lupus and couldn't have children. One of my best friends adopted a boy a few years ago and has been on the waiting list for another child.

What do you think?

I think it's a terrible idea to present someone as a role model to teens who goes through with a pregnancy knowing full well they intend to abbandon their child.

There are more than enough children needing homes in fostercare and in orphanages to satify everyone who wants to adopt children.

No one is waiting to adopt children per se. What they are waiting for are lily white newborns to adopt.

 

[Baruch Menachem]

The goal was to get the two of them married.

I think the better option back when would have been adopt right out of the oven. Given Bristol's general behavior over the last two years, I still think adoption would be a wise choice even now. But as the baby grows up, it is more and more attached to its family. Every day they put adoption off, they make it harder on her.

Using Bristol as a spokesperson shows that whoever is responsible for hiring her is as big an idiot as Bristol.

 

[AllieBaba]

After reading the train wreck that is the Bristol Palin thread and her being a spokesperson for teen motherhood, it made me wonder......

Wouldn't it have been better if they chose a teen that gave her baby up for adoption?

Now I know Bristol Palin has a lot of family support and money to help her care for her child, but most teens don't.

So.........................

Seems to me a girl who is in her teens and not ready to take up the responsibility of teen motherhood and doesn't want to abort her baby would consider giving up her baby for adoption.

There are many families out there waiting to be parents. I know first hand, my brother and his wife adopted 2 children because my SIL had Lupus and couldn't have children. One of my best friends adopted a boy a few years ago and has been on the waiting list for another child.

What do you think?

Now that does make sense to a point. However, what a teen adoptive parent wouldn't have that Bristol does is the press...there's a lot to be said about a girl who gives a voice to single teen mothers who chose to keep their babies, too. And ultimately, they might be the ones who most need an advocate and guidance. A teenager who has a baby and gives it up isn't as likely to be lacking in a positive role model as a teen who keeps her baby then goes ahead and has more...

I think of the two, the girls who most need guidance are the ones who get pregnant young. Those are the ones we need to teach that it's okay to make a mistake, but you can take control of your body and your life at any time. Delivering, and keeping, a child does not mean you are doomed.

 

[Baruch Menachem]

After reading the train wreck that is the Bristol Palin thread and her being a spokesperson for teen motherhood, it made me wonder......

Wouldn't it have been better if they chose a teen that gave her baby up for adoption?

Now I know Bristol Palin has a lot of family support and money to help her care for her child, but most teens don't.

So.........................

Seems to me a girl who is in her teens and not ready to take up the responsibility of teen motherhood and doesn't want to abort her baby would consider giving up her baby for adoption.

There are many families out there waiting to be parents. I know first hand, my brother and his wife adopted 2 children because my SIL had Lupus and couldn't have children. One of my best friends adopted a boy a few years ago and has been on the waiting list for another child.

What do you think?

I think it's a terrible idea to present someone their child as a role model to teens who goes through with a pregnancy knowing full well they intend to abbandon.

There are more than enough children needing homes in fostercare and in orphanages to satify everyone who wants to adopt children.

No one is waiting to adopt children per se. What they are waiting for are lily white newborns to adopt.

I don't think so. There is a huge overseas adoption industry. Babies are adopted from China, India, Korea and Africa in huge numbers.

Parents want babies with no health problems. Which is why they prefer to adopt girls. More healthy girls are given up than healthy boys.

 

[Toro]

After reading the train wreck that is the Bristol Palin thread and her being a spokesperson for teen motherhood, it made me wonder......

Wouldn't it have been better if they chose a teen that gave her baby up for adoption?

Now I know Bristol Palin has a lot of family support and money to help her care for her child, but most teens don't.

So.........................

Seems to me a girl who is in her teens and not ready to take up the responsibility of teen motherhood and doesn't want to abort her baby would consider giving up her baby for adoption.

There are many families out there waiting to be parents. I know first hand, my brother and his wife adopted 2 children because my SIL had Lupus and couldn't have children. One of my best friends adopted a boy a few years ago and has been on the waiting list for another child.

What do you think?

I'm a big fan of teen moms putting kids up for adoption because I was a kid born to a teenage mom who put me up for adoption. My parents - the people who adopted me - were great parents. My biological mother and her family - nice people in many ways- are train wrecks. I consider myself to have won the lottery of life having been given up for adoption.

My brothers feel pretty lucky too. They don't even want to find their biological family, my one brother did when he was younger, but he decided he didn't want to after a while.
My aunts son found her a year and half ago, and it was great. She is actually very involved in his life now, and we even all got to meet him. Her life would have been completely different if she had kept him, for one it was the 60s.

I had no desire whatsoever to meet my biological mother and father. But my biological sister found me. After they found me, I went to visit my biological mother and my biological brothers and sisters. They are nice people and I have a relationship with them. But I never had any desire at all to find them. I always knew I was adopted and I had great parents. But after they found me, I couldn't pass it up. I had to know what my life would have been had she not put me up for adoption.

 

[random3434]

After reading the train wreck that is the Bristol Palin thread and her being a spokesperson for teen motherhood, it made me wonder......

Wouldn't it have been better if they chose a teen that gave her baby up for adoption?

Now I know Bristol Palin has a lot of family support and money to help her care for her child, but most teens don't.

So.........................

Seems to me a girl who is in her teens and not ready to take up the responsibility of teen motherhood and doesn't want to abort her baby would consider giving up her baby for adoption.

There are many families out there waiting to be parents. I know first hand, my brother and his wife adopted 2 children because my SIL had Lupus and couldn't have children. One of my best friends adopted a boy a few years ago and has been on the waiting list for another child.

What do you think?

I think it's a terrible idea to present someone their child as a role model to teens who goes through with a pregnancy knowing full well they intend to abbandon.

There are more than enough children needing homes in fostercare and in orphanages to satify everyone who wants to adopt children.

No one is waiting to adopt children per se. What they are waiting for are lily white newborns to adopt.

Not everyone eel.

My white friend Sara and her white hubby adopted 2 black boys.

My friend Ann ( a single mom fyi) adopted a little girl from China.

Another teacher I work with has adopted 3 interracial children.

And I see a lot of Asian babies with white parents at the YMCA.

So far I haven't seen many minority parents with white babies though.................wonder who could be the spokesperson for them?


PS-When I first read your post I thought it was by AgainShelia!~

 

[Luissa]

I'm a big fan of teen moms putting kids up for adoption because I was a kid born to a teenage mom who put me up for adoption. My parents - the people who adopted me - were great parents. My biological mother and her family - nice people in many ways- are train wrecks. I consider myself to have won the lottery of life having been given up for adoption.

My brothers feel pretty lucky too. They don't even want to find their biological family, my one brother did when he was younger, but he decided he didn't want to after a while.
My aunts son found her a year and half ago, and it was great. She is actually very involved in his life now, and we even all got to meet him. Her life would have been completely different if she had kept him, for one it was the 60s.

I had no desire whatsoever to meet my biological mother and father. But my biological sister found me. After they found me, I went to visit my biological mother and my biological brothers and sisters. They are nice people and I have a relationship with them. But I never had any desire at all to find them. I always knew I was adopted and I had great parents. But after they found me, I couldn't pass it up. I had to know what my life would have been had she not put me up for adoption.

I know my brother has siblings, but no one has ever tried to find him. His mom was a nurse who had an affair while her husband was in Vietnam. I wonder if they will ever try to find him?
My other brother is half Native, and was adopted a year before the Indian Child Welfare Act. My mom doesn't know too much about what the situation was with his parents.

 

[AllieBaba]

What are you even talking about?
It has nothing to do with popularity and everything to do with sending children a TRUTHFUL message.

And exactly what is the truth ? Teen mothers run the entire gamut from worthless to great. Do you really think they are all planning to be on DWTS ?

Some might, after seeing Bristol or something like it. Her life says, that even though you are a teen mom you can still be rich. Has she even gone to college at all?
In reality a teen mom is probably never going to be rich, her kids father isn't going to be in Playgirl, and she wont be rewarded for acting like a brat.

When they wanted to scare teens about meth us here they didn't get some glamorous celebrity who had done meth. They put some white trash meth heads picture on the campaign, with meth bites and all. That is reality. Being poor, living pay check to pay check with a kid's father who doesn't contribute or is a loser is reality.

Everybody has witnessed the battering Bristol has been subjected to. She's been the butt of late night talk show jokes, a running punchline for comedians, she's been called disgusting names; her baby daddy has shit all over her publicly.

Being a single parent is tough regardless of whether or not you have money. There are plenty of girls who might have a harder time of it financially, but none that are so well known...

 

[Anguille]

After reading the train wreck that is the Bristol Palin thread and her being a spokesperson for teen motherhood, it made me wonder......

Wouldn't it have been better if they chose a teen that gave her baby up for adoption?

Now I know Bristol Palin has a lot of family support and money to help her care for her child, but most teens don't.

So.........................

Seems to me a girl who is in her teens and not ready to take up the responsibility of teen motherhood and doesn't want to abort her baby would consider giving up her baby for adoption.

There are many families out there waiting to be parents. I know first hand, my brother and his wife adopted 2 children because my SIL had Lupus and couldn't have children. One of my best friends adopted a boy a few years ago and has been on the waiting list for another child.

What do you think?

I think it's a terrible idea to present someone their child as a role model to teens who goes through with a pregnancy knowing full well they intend to abbandon.

There are more than enough children needing homes in fostercare and in orphanages to satify everyone who wants to adopt children.

No one is waiting to adopt children per se. What they are waiting for are lily white newborns to adopt.

Not everyone eel.

My white friend Sara and her white hubby adopted 2 black boys.

My friend Ann ( a single mom fyi) adopted a little girl from China.

Another teacher I work with has adopted 3 interracial children.

And I see a lot of Asian babies with white parents at the YMCA.

So far I haven't seen many minority parents with white babies though.................wonder who could be the spokesperson for them?

Good for them. I wish more people weren't so picky.
I have a black friend who has a white foster child. One day he took off on her at the mall so she had to report him as a runaway, as she is required to do. When she described him to the cop who responded to her call he asked her what the hell a white kid was doing living in a black neighborhood.

 

[Gem]

I just don't see Bristol Palin being a spokesperson for this issue as a big deal. I think that the people who are making it into one are doing so because they dislike Sarah Palin and her entire bizarre clan. Most people in the really real world (and by that I mean the majority of people in the U.S. who do not give two shits about politics, politicians, politicians' kids, and the like)...simply. don't. care.

We've got single young Hollywood stars getting pregnant or adopting kids on their own, having babies out of wedlock and then breaking up with their boyfriends, having twins in their 40s with no regard as to what its going to be like to be in their 50's when their kiddos are 10, stars having 6 kids and traipsing around to 3rd world nations with the toddlers...and all of that is just great...mention that they might not be the best role models on earth and you get slammed as a right wing pig who should mind their own closeted conservative bigoted-christian business...

But a girl no one really cares about (because seriously, only people heavily interested in politics give two shits about Bristol Palin...to everyone else shes just some girl related to some politician they either kinda like or kinda hate) with a rich, supportive family has a kid by an idiot guy and is making money telling young girls that its not all that much fun after all and that they should wait....and she's the bad guy?!? Seriously?

I think we should all chill the fuck out about this sort of issue...its not even an issue...its people who hate Sarah Palin looking for ANY reason to keep talking about this ridiculous family. If you hate them so much, Democrats and Liberals...PLEASE do what the majority of the rest of us are trying to do...ignore them...and they will go away!

 

[random3434]

Thank you for that insight Gem!

Now, what do you think about teen moms giving their babies up for adoption. Do you feel that would be a good alternative to abortion or trying to raise the child with the handicap of their age and limited resources??

 

[Gem]

Now, what do you think about teen moms giving their babies up for adoption. Do you feel that would be a good alternative to abortion or trying to raise the child with the handicap of their age and limited resources??

I absolutely think that adoption should be the first choice of any pregnant teen old enough to safely deliver a baby. I think that more needs to be done to help pregnant teens understand the life-changing, enormous responsibility having a child is and how it will alter their lives forever.

I just don't think that one more teen mother saying, "Hey...its REALLY HARD...and you shouldn't do it," is better than nothing...better than a movie star saying, "I'm having a baby...I don't need a partner...I'm gonna do it on my own." And then promptly hiring a live-in nanny.

Is Bristol Palin the role model I would have chosen for teen pregnancy? No. I dislike the Palin family and find them bizarre and vaguely creepy. But this hysteria of Bristol Palin is silliness...and, in my opinion, politically motivated rather than based on any authentic concern that teens turn to adoption rather than abortion or raising babies on their own.

 

[AllieBaba]

I think it's a terrible idea to present someone their child as a role model to teens who goes through with a pregnancy knowing full well they intend to abbandon.

There are more than enough children needing homes in fostercare and in orphanages to satify everyone who wants to adopt children.

No one is waiting to adopt children per se. What they are waiting for are lily white newborns to adopt.

Not everyone eel.

My white friend Sara and her white hubby adopted 2 black boys.

My friend Ann ( a single mom fyi) adopted a little girl from China.

Another teacher I work with has adopted 3 interracial children.

And I see a lot of Asian babies with white parents at the YMCA.

So far I haven't seen many minority parents with white babies though.................wonder who could be the spokesperson for them?

Good for them. I wish more people weren't so picky.
I have a black friend who has a white foster child. One day he took off on her at the mall so she had to report him as a runaway, as she is required to do. When she described him to the cop who responded to her call he asked her what the hell a white kid was doing living in a black neighborhood.

Good lord, fucking cops!

That is not a directive, so try to restrain yourself.

 

[Sheldon]

Not sure if this is true, I heard that if you are pre-planning to give the baby up for adoption, then at birth they don't even let the mom see the baby. The doctors just take the baby out of the room right away so that there's not time for as much of an emotional bond to form. That's pretty gut-wrenching.

But I think just generally that's probably what's best for the kid. You don't want the baby crying at night because little dude's got an empty stomach and you can't do ANYthing about that because you have NO money until the paycheck deposits in two days, so all you can do is hear your kid cry in hunger and think how terrible a parent you are because you can't provide even the basic thing. That's got to be even more gut-wrenching.

 

[Sheldon]

As far as Bristol goes, it's a double edge sword. She's got the name recognition and that helps to raise awareness about the charity. But at the same time, because of the money that this same name has brought in, she's not coming from a place of real understanding about what it's like to be just the average teen mom. She is not a good example; she's just a visible one.