[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bZKgfLuDOhc&feature=related]YouTube - The Bridge 6/9[/ame]
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Ex and I had a bust up laugh today when he was installing my desk drawer for my keyboard. Here we are, all hunkered under the desk, my right shoulder useless my right wrist throbbing so I'm balancing on my left hip which is screaming but my left arm is pain free so I'm holding up the drawer thingy while he is using the electric drill for the screws to get it in position where I want the drawer to be...then he crawls out first....pretty spry....and I'm still stuck. So he has to help me skootch out and I'm OW OW OWing then wind up on my knees, which is fine but my toes are fucked up with RA too so I have to position myself just so, and he starts to laugh and said for me to stay in that position cuz my head is right even with his.....well....I start laughing and say it isn't funny and no way, in his dreams, then he finally finds a place to put his hand to get me all the way up and by then both of us are in tears and I said as I finally flopped on the recliner "kill me when I'm 65 cuz by then I will be bedridden" and he says "I'll just hand ya the 38 I just bought ya. Warn me so I can be fishing when you do it. Oh, and don't forget to lay down plastic before you pull the trigger" which made us laugh some more.
Funny thing is..he thought I was joking. I will not make him obligated to take care of a RA riddled woman that can't wipe her own ass. Period.
I'm only 59. I can imagine what it's going to be like when I'm 65. Ain't gonna happen. Nope.
I'll stick around for the fur kids and the ex and only for that reason. But if I can't be independent and take care of them as they take care of me...............well, sometimes ............
I'll stfu though. Im off to bed.
Suicide is a long term solution to a short term problem.