Sky Dancer
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- Jan 21, 2009
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- #81
If you love NVC so much, why don't you practice it?
If you modeled it for us, perhaps that would help us with our internal motivation.
Preaching it but not practicing is doing the cause more harm than good as it adds to resistance to the ideas you present.
Well, I'm not accomplished at it. I doubt anyone here has the patience for me to learn it.
What it would involve is learning about what myself and others need and then determining how to meet those needs in a win win way.
It also involves understanding that some behavior occurs that isn't desirable, but is the best way a person knows how to meet their needs.
Let's say I have a need to share something I'm newly learning about, so I start a thread about it. Someone else comes into the thread with a different need. I don't know what those needs are unless I ask everyone. Some people don't know what they need, but have to be helped to figure it out.
You have to learn what your needs and values are to switch your behavior over to a Non-Violent Communication model.
I'm very newly learning about this--instrinsic motivation and Non-violent Communication.
I could start with you, Amelia. What needs of yours are satisfied by posting in this thread? What are your values?
I'm not interested in NVC. Not to the extent that I wish to discuss it with you.
I was somewhat interested in the idea about the sometimes paradoxical relationship between reward and motivation. My interest in that was dampened by my realization that the topic seemed to be just another way for you to preach about the NVC you don't seem to grasp at all.
My interest at the time I began posting in the thread was to back up Sherry's moderate and rational input. I had sent her a rep. Then on a whim I posted my snarky little cartoon. So then I decided to post something more constructive, to make my support of Sherry public and because I felt a little sorry about the cartoon.
I've made my support for Sherry's input clear and I don't foresee any other needs of mine being met by active participation in the thread. Not ruling it out, but don't see it as likely.
By the way, in case you haven't noticed, your repeated references to NVC are not conducive to good discussions. Perhaps it would be helpful if you would practice it for a few months without talking about it among with political forumites who have all-too-often seen you make public resolutions only to break them in very short order. Your public resolutions seem counterproductive in general. This one seems so in particular.
This post is a good illustration of carrot and stick manipulation.