Israeli joke of the day

[P F Tinmore]

Israel: No reason to think Mossad killed Hamas man

JERUSALEM – Israel's foreign minister said Wednesday there was no reason to assume the Mossad assassinated a Hamas military commander in Dubai, even as suspicions mounted that the country's vaunted spy agency made the hit using the identities of Israelis with European passports.

Israel: No reason to think Mossad killed Hamas man - Yahoo! News

 

[Charles Stucker]

During the war, a Syrian infantry captains potted an Israeli soldier creeping across a dune as the sun set. He summoned a sergeant who he sent with a full platoon of men to get the Israeli and bring him in for questioning. Around midnight a furious firefight erupted in the direction his men had gone. As the sun rose, his sergeant, bleeding and exhausted crawled back to the line with a report, "Sir it was an ambush. There were two Israeli's"

 

[Shogun]

UBERMENSCH!!!

 

[Kalam]

Israel is the joke of the day. If you've missed anything, don't worry; they're in town all week and have been for the past 60 years.

 

[toomuchtime_]

Israel is the joke of the day. If you've missed anything, don't worry; they're in town all week and have been for the past 60 years.

They've been in town for the last 4,000 years, but they only managed to liberate their land from the British occupiers about 60 years ago.

 

[Charles Stucker]

Israel is the joke of the day.

Which makes it even funnier when they kick the crap out of all their Islamic Arab neighbors.

 

[Kalam]

Israel is the joke of the day. If you've missed anything, don't worry; they're in town all week and have been for the past 60 years.

They've been in town for the last 4,000 years, but they only managed to liberate their land from the British occupiers about 60 years ago.

The occupiers are still there. Sorry, but the fact that handful of Jews have maintained a presence in the Levant does not give all Jews the freedom to flock to Palestine in droves and rule over Muslims and Christians.

 

[Kalam]

Israel is the joke of the day.

Which makes it even funnier when they kick the crap out of all their Islamic Arab neighbors.

Right, who would have expected Israel to win with twice as many troops and a huge influx of Czech munitions?

Don't worry; the war's not over.

 

[Charles Stucker]

Israel is the joke of the day.

Which makes it even funnier when they kick the crap out of all their Islamic Arab neighbors.

Right, who would have expected Israel to win with twice as many troops and a huge influx of Czech munitions?

Which war are you thinking about?
The trend has historically been for Israel to be horribly outnumbered. But I suppose that is unfair as the Arabs never did learn to count.

 

[Shogun]

Which makes it even funnier when they kick the crap out of all their Islamic Arab neighbors.

Right, who would have expected Israel to win with twice as many troops and a huge influx of Czech munitions?

Which war are you thinking about?
The trend has historically been for Israel to be horribly outnumbered. But I suppose that is unfair as the Arabs never did learn to count.

indeed.. the one thing that comes to mind about Cast Lead was how badly israel was outnumbered by rock throwing refugees.

 

[toomuchtime_]

Israel is the joke of the day. If you've missed anything, don't worry; they're in town all week and have been for the past 60 years.

They've been in town for the last 4,000 years, but they only managed to liberate their land from the British occupiers about 60 years ago.

The occupiers are still there. Sorry, but the fact that handful of Jews have maintained a presence in the Levant does not give all Jews the freedom to flock to Palestine in droves and rule over Muslims and Christians.

According to the British reports to the League of Nations (available at the UN website) it was the Arabs who flocked to Palestine in droves during the 1920's and during the 1930's when Jewish immigration was almost zero. In fact, so many Arabs flocked to the area to try to create an Arab majority so they could rule over Christians and Jews that according to UNRWA a refugee, whether living in the territories or elsewhere, is some one who lived in what is now Israel for only two years between 1946 and 1948 or who had an ancestor who did so, so it's not at all clear how many Arabs who left can claim they or their families had been there before the Jews arrived and how many moved there in the hope of disenfranchising the Jews.

 

[Charles Stucker]

so it's not at all clear how many Arabs who left can claim they or their families had been there before the Jews arrived and how many moved there in the hope of disenfranchising the Jews.

Too many facts spoil the joke.
Q - What happened when the Arab tried to blow up the Israeli school bus?
A - He burned his lips.

 

[Kalam]

Which makes it even funnier when they kick the crap out of all their Islamic Arab neighbors.

Right, who would have expected Israel to win with twice as many troops and a huge influx of Czech munitions?

Which war are you thinking about?
The trend has historically been for Israel to be horribly outnumbered. But I suppose that is unfair as the Arabs never did learn to count.

Israel has not been outnumbered in any conflict save, perhaps, the one they started in 1967 when mean ol' Nasser's rhetoric got them all a-skeert.

 

[Kalam]

during the 1920's and during the 1930's when Jewish immigration was almost zero...

In fact, so many Arabs flocked to the area to try to create an Arab majority so they could rule over Christians and Jews...

I shudder at the thought of how abjectly stupid you must be to actually believe in the veracity of what you've posted.

 

[Charles Stucker]

during the 1920's and during the 1930's when Jewish immigration was almost zero...

In fact, so many Arabs flocked to the area to try to create an Arab majority so they could rule over Christians and Jews...

I shudder at the thought of how abjectly stupid you must be to actually believe in the veracity of what you've posted.

I shudder at the thought of how abjectly stupid you must be to actually believe in the veracity of what you've posted.

 

[Kalam]

during the 1920's and during the 1930's when Jewish immigration was almost zero...

In fact, so many Arabs flocked to the area to try to create an Arab majority so they could rule over Christians and Jews...

I shudder at the thought of how abjectly stupid you must be to actually believe in the veracity of what you've posted.

I shudder at the thought of how abjectly stupid you must be to actually believe in the veracity of what you've posted.

Very good. Mimicry is an important first step toward learning to articulate your thoughts.

 

[Douger]

Israel is the joke of the day.

Which makes it even funnier when they kick the crap out of all their Islamic Arab neighbors.

..........and do it with YOUR equipment and welfare checks.

 

[Charles Stucker]

Very good. Mimicry is an important first step toward learning to articulate your thoughts.

Except that TooMuchTime got it right you ignoramus.

Now back to our scheduled joke
To paraphrase Churchill and Lambert
Q - How many Arabs does it take to have peace in the Middle East?
A - There can be only one.

 

[Kalam]

Except that TooMuchTime got it right you ignoramus.

Anybody who sincerely believes that Arabs migrated hundreds of miles just to out-populate Jews is a complete and utter moron. It comes as no surprise that you fall into that category.

 

[al Haq]

According to the British reports to the League of Nations (available at the UN website) it was the Arabs who flocked to Palestine in droves during the 1920's and during the 1930's when Jewish immigration was almost zero. In fact, so many Arabs flocked to the area to try to create an Arab majority so they could rule over Christians and Jews that according to UNRWA a refugee, whether living in the territories or elsewhere, is some one who lived in what is now Israel for only two years between 1946 and 1948 or who had an ancestor who did so, so it's not at all clear how many Arabs who left can claim they or their families had been there before the Jews arrived and how many moved there in the hope of disenfranchising the Jews.

This claim is straight out of Joan Peters' "From Time Immemorial" - a book called "worthless," "fraudulent" and "ludicrous" by scholars around the world, including in Israel:

In Israel, at least, the book was almost universally dismissed as sheer rubbish except maybe as a propaganda weapon.

- Yehoshua Porath, Israeli historian

The book said that there were no Palestinians in Palestine until the Zionists came along and made the desert bloom, and then the Palestinians began to arrive to Palestine. It was a book that was of no value whatsoever, it simply recycled very old and stale Israeli propaganda. But it was a book that American Jews wanted to have, because it completely whitewashed Israel.

-Avi Shlaim, professor of International Relations, University of Oxford

LMAO