Dear Liberals: I Want a Divorce!

[kwc57]

Feel free to leave.

Islands for Sale, Private Islands, Luxury Real Estate

Sandy did..

Yeahhhh......the problem with that is......conservatives actually love America. Liberals........not so much.

 

[kwc57]

For our liberal comrades in the room.

View attachment 19213

 

[Uncensored2008]

So yes, we can divorce, and we will end up with all the wealthiest people in America. This sounds great.

If so, how will your class warfare work? You going to teach people to hate Oprah?

 

[Mr. Peepers]

Can you imagine what a horrible, unlivable shit-hole a conservative country would be? It would be like the movie "Idiocracy".

 

[kwc57]

Feel free to leave.

Islands for Sale, Private Islands, Luxury Real Estate

Sandy did..

Indeed. I am so effing sick of the complaining and whining from the right while they do absolutely nothing to help the president in his efforts to create jobs. The rw's all hate that President Obama has created more than 4 MILLION jobs while the Rs have done nothing at all for more than 10 years. Unless you count the filibustering and obstructing and constant lying.

Don't like it?

Don't let the screen door ........... you know the rest.

I am honestly amazed that you are intelligent enough to breathe on your own. Of course we don't support Obama's "efforts" to "create" jobs. Why? Because his efforts include borrowing from China to fund "stimulus" projects for temporary jobs. An example, I've lived in Oklahoma City for 55 years. We are building sidewalks in neighborhoods that have never had them for 75 years. Didn't need them for 75 years, don't need them now. Also, they are literally tearing out existing sidewalks to build new ones in their place. What happens to the Mexicans building those sidewalks when we run out of "stimulus" money or we run out of places to build sidewalks? What has Obama done to create long term career type jobs? Diddly shit.

 

[BDBoop]

Can you imagine what a horrible, unlivable shit-hole a conservative country would be? It would be like the movie "Idiocracy".

And their national anthem would be Dueling Banjos.

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9gLN3QoN-q8]Squeal Like a Pig - YouTube[/ame]

 

[peach174]

(Disclaimer: This is an adaptation of a divorce agreement that has been circulating around the internet for awhile.)

To All My Dearest Beloved Liberal, Leftist, Social Progressive, Regressive, Marxist, and Liberation Theologist Friends:

Since we are not going to get gasoline back to $1.50 per gallon and coffee to $2.00 per pound, it is time to divide up our common property and split the sheets so to speak. To wit I propose the following:

DIVORCE AGREEMENT​

WHEREAS, we have stuck together since the late 1950s for the sake of the kids and for sake of future generations, but the whole of this latest election process has revealed that our relationship has clearly run its course, and

WHEREAS, our two ideological sides of America cannot and will not ever agree on what is right for us all,

THEREFORE let's end it on friendly terms. We can smile and chalk it up to irreconcilable differences and go our own way.

Here is the suggested model separation agreement:

1. Our two groups can equitably divide up the country by land mass apportioned according to numerical representation. You can have California, Oregon, and Washington State. We'll take all the rest.

2. We don't like redistributive taxes, so you can keep them.

3. You are welcome to the liberal judges and the ACLU.

4. Since you hate guns and war, we'll take our firearms, the cops, the NRA, and the military.

5. We'll take the nasty, smelly oil industry and you can go with all the wind, solar, and bio-diesel.

6. You can keep Oprah, Michael Moore, and Rosie O'Donnell. You are, however, responsible for finding a bio-diesel vehicle big enough to move all three of them.

7. We'll keep capitalism, greedy corporations, pharmaceutical companies, Wal-Mart, and Wall Street.

8. You can have your beloved lifelong welfare dwellers, food stamps, homeless homeboys, hippies, druggies, illegal aliens, unions, peaceniks, war protesters, and the OSW groups.

9. We'll keep the hot Alaskan hockey moms, greedy CEO's and rednecks.

10. We'll keep the Bibles and give you NBC and Hollywood

11. You can make nice with Iran and Palestine and we'll retain the right to invade and hammer places that threaten us or hit back when we are threatened or attacked.

14. You are welcome to Islam, Scientology, Humanism, political correctness, and Shirley McLain. You can also have the U.N., but we will no longer be paying the bill.

13. We'll keep our Judeo-Christian values.

14. We'll keep the SUV's, pickup trucks, and oversized luxury cars. You can take every Chevy Volt you can find.

15. You can give everyone healthcare if you can find any doctors to deliver it. We'll continue to believe that healthcare is more affordable and more excellent in a free market system.

16. We'll keep "The Battle Hymn of the Republic", "God Bless America", and "The National Anthem."

17. You get "Imagine", "I'd Like to Teach the World to Sing", "Kum Ba Ya," or "We Are the World".

18. We'll practice trickledown economics and you can continue to give trickle up poverty your best shot.

19. Since it often so offends you, we'll keep our history, our name and our constitution and our flag.

Please sign and pass it on if you will agree to this equitable distribution of property, values, and practices.

In the spirit of friendly parting, we will arrange for a community picnic in about 10 years to compare notes and see how each other are doing.

Sincerely,

Your Conservative Friends


P.S.: Also, please take Ted Turner, Sean Penn, Martin Sheen, Barbara Streisand, Alec Baldwin, and Jane Fonda with you.

P.S.S..: And you won't have to "Press 1 for English" when you call our country.

So conservatives only want a country where everyone thinks the same, has the same ideas, and the same political views? And how are you going to keep all the greedy corporations if you get rid of Ted Turner, Oprah, and Washington State? Plus there is Nike and Apple in California and Oregon. Hope you guys love paying more for imported computers and shoes.

No, that is what the Dem's want.

 

[kwc57]

every time i see something like this i wonder how conservatives think they can stay free in a country of their own design where those in the ruling class are unencumbered by taxation, regulation and accountability and the freely exploited working class is on its own and works for practically nothing. No social mobility, no access to medical care, crappy bible based education and no way on earth to get a fair hearing of grievances.

agreeing with california girl that the left has little sense of humor and virtually no imagination. But let's keep trying for awhile.

Don't worry about us occupied. I am offering you the chance for your own utopia unencumbered by all those evil conservatives. Doesn't the idea appeal to you?

no, the very idea of two single party governments on this continent is pretty scary, might as well ask the tired old question "who would win in a red state-blue state civil war?".

View attachment 19214

 

[sealybobo]

I mostly agreed but did you ever see that Southpark episode where we realize that us liberals need you cons and you cons need us. If not for you, we'd be pussies and taken over by Russia. But if not for us, the rest of the world would think America was all evil and then they would all team up to destroy us.

 

[Katzndogz]

Odd that libs think they would get the venture capitalists when they hate venture capitalists so much. How about, we get Bain, you get ACORN and the unions?

 

[sealybobo]

We get NY, MI, Ill and CA. The only thing south we want to claim is Florida. You can have one from up north. Just not one of the ones I mentioned. And we get Alaska.

 

[BDBoop]

They should take South Dakota - except the Indians want that back.

Well, they can't have Minnesota.

Wisconsin! Give 'em Wisconsin. They can see Walker in action.

 

[kwc57]

Have you leftists ALL forgotten how to have any fun at all? Don't you see that you don't need to concern yourself with whatever the conservatives are doing if we each just divide up and do our own thing. You guys have been clamoring for years to get read of all conservative values and embrace leftist ones. We're offering you the opportunity to have your own country exactly the way you want it. Take it.

I understand completely what you are trying to do but matters of secession and equal protection are not something to be taken lightly, I notice that conservatives think they have natural ownership of our UNION's founding documents and national symbols as they joke lightly about becoming something other than the United States of America. We are stuck together, get used to it.

There is nothing to stop us from collectively electing to split up and go our separate ways. All we have to do is divide up the property in an amicable way and you guys can do anything you want. The Left has NEVER appreciated the content of the Founding documents OR the original content of the Constitution, so you would at last be able to write one much more to your liking. I'm sure it would make fascinating reading.

Don't you understand? I'm offering you guys a country that you can twist and turn or make anything you want out of. Do it exactly the way you have been telling us for years that you want to do. You wouldn't have to be subjected to a single evil conservative thought, policy, idea, or concept because not a soul would interfere with you doing your own thing 100%.

How come you guys on the Left are resisting this?

They don't even have to work very hard at creating their own founding document.

View attachment 19215

 

[sealybobo]

Odd that libs think they would get the venture capitalists when they hate venture capitalists so much. How about, we get Bain, you get ACORN and the unions?

Of course we have unions. Why else do you think we have such a big strong middle class? And we tarriff anything you try to import in. Except tobacco of course.

In a year we'll have an illegal immigration problem. You guys sneaking in to get our good paying jobs. But you won't get away with it because we penalize illegal employers if they hire illegals.

But how will we tell you from us? We can't racially profile you because you look just like us. That's ok. Enjoy yourself while you are here. Like in Switzerland or Canada, you can't get a job if you aren't a citizen in our country. That drives wages down. Just look at what is happening in your country.

 

[wjmacguffin]

Odd that libs think they would get the venture capitalists when they hate venture capitalists so much. How about, we get Bain, you get ACORN and the unions?

Venture capitalism is all good. We'll keep that, please. You can stick with vulture capitalism like Bain practiced.

 

[tjvh]

Problem with the WHOLE divorce thing is the Left has to give up the one thing they they crave most... CONTROLLING OTHER PEOPLE"S LIVES.

 

[Foxfyre]

Now, now boys and girls. It is to be expected that there will be a bit of residual testiness, but we can keep this amicable. At least the conservatives can. So far having fun and enjoying the exercise seems to be beyond the capacity of most of our humorless Leftist friends who continue to post insulting post after insulting post, but that is one of the reasons that the divorce is necessary. I encourage the conservatives to see the humor as well as the possibilities and not take their bait. (I do appreciate the two or three from their side who are beginning to get into the spirit of the possibilities.)

We will have our own differences of opinions in how best to accomplish goals and objectives and even in what goals and objectives we want to shoot for. As has already been pointed out, once the Leftists have departed, we will still have some fringe groups and a few wierdos to deal with, and will need to work out some kinks in a few things where differences of opinion exist.

But when I look at our more extreme and less mainstream groups compared to PETA, the OWS, and some of the environmental wackos that will to go to their side, I think we will still probably get the best end of the stick.

So lets keep it light and keep plugging away at achieving a satisfactory divorce agreement for both sides so we can each have the country we want. It is the only way that we Conservatives will be able to get back to the American exceptionalism that allows so much joy and pride and sense of accomplishment, but which so offends our Leftist brethren.

 

[Foxfyre]

By the way, since its Number One industry is oil production, Alaska will have to stay on the Conservative side. Remember we are taking the hated oil barons and all the evil oil. The Leftists will get all the wind farms, solar, and bio fuel industries.

 

[Luissa]

(Disclaimer: This is an adaptation of a divorce agreement that has been circulating around the internet for awhile.)

To All My Dearest Beloved Liberal, Leftist, Social Progressive, Regressive, Marxist, and Liberation Theologist Friends:

Since we are not going to get gasoline back to $1.50 per gallon and coffee to $2.00 per pound, it is time to divide up our common property and split the sheets so to speak. To wit I propose the following:

DIVORCE AGREEMENT​

WHEREAS, we have stuck together since the late 1950s for the sake of the kids and for sake of future generations, but the whole of this latest election process has revealed that our relationship has clearly run its course, and

WHEREAS, our two ideological sides of America cannot and will not ever agree on what is right for us all,

THEREFORE let's end it on friendly terms. We can smile and chalk it up to irreconcilable differences and go our own way.

Here is the suggested model separation agreement:

1. Our two groups can equitably divide up the country by land mass apportioned according to numerical representation. You can have California, Oregon, and Washington State. We'll take all the rest.

2. We don't like redistributive taxes, so you can keep them.

3. You are welcome to the liberal judges and the ACLU.

4. Since you hate guns and war, we'll take our firearms, the cops, the NRA, and the military.

5. We'll take the nasty, smelly oil industry and you can go with all the wind, solar, and bio-diesel.

6. You can keep Oprah, Michael Moore, and Rosie O'Donnell. You are, however, responsible for finding a bio-diesel vehicle big enough to move all three of them.

7. We'll keep capitalism, greedy corporations, pharmaceutical companies, Wal-Mart, and Wall Street.

8. You can have your beloved lifelong welfare dwellers, food stamps, homeless homeboys, hippies, druggies, illegal aliens, unions, peaceniks, war protesters, and the OSW groups.

9. We'll keep the hot Alaskan hockey moms, greedy CEO's and rednecks.

10. We'll keep the Bibles and give you NBC and Hollywood

11. You can make nice with Iran and Palestine and we'll retain the right to invade and hammer places that threaten us or hit back when we are threatened or attacked.

14. You are welcome to Islam, Scientology, Humanism, political correctness, and Shirley McLain. You can also have the U.N., but we will no longer be paying the bill.

13. We'll keep our Judeo-Christian values.

14. We'll keep the SUV's, pickup trucks, and oversized luxury cars. You can take every Chevy Volt you can find.

15. You can give everyone healthcare if you can find any doctors to deliver it. We'll continue to believe that healthcare is more affordable and more excellent in a free market system.

16. We'll keep "The Battle Hymn of the Republic", "God Bless America", and "The National Anthem."

17. You get "Imagine", "I'd Like to Teach the World to Sing", "Kum Ba Ya," or "We Are the World".

18. We'll practice trickledown economics and you can continue to give trickle up poverty your best shot.

19. Since it often so offends you, we'll keep our history, our name and our constitution and our flag.

Please sign and pass it on if you will agree to this equitable distribution of property, values, and practices.

In the spirit of friendly parting, we will arrange for a community picnic in about 10 years to compare notes and see how each other are doing.

Sincerely,

Your Conservative Friends


P.S.: Also, please take Ted Turner, Sean Penn, Martin Sheen, Barbara Streisand, Alec Baldwin, and Jane Fonda with you.

P.S.S..: And you won't have to "Press 1 for English" when you call our country.

So conservatives only want a country where everyone thinks the same, has the same ideas, and the same political views? And how are you going to keep all the greedy corporations if you get rid of Ted Turner, Oprah, and Washington State? Plus there is Nike and Apple in California and Oregon. Hope you guys love paying more for imported computers and shoes.

No, that is what the Dem's want.

A dem didn't post this. Just sayin.

 

[The T]

By the way, since its Number One industry is oil production, Alaska will have to stay on the Conservative side. Remember we are taking the hated oil barons and all the evil oil. The Leftists will get all the wind farms, solar, and bio fuel industries.

Do we get to keep the Military?

How will the liberals defend themselves? Oh yeah...they have Cumbya...plenty to ward off ANY attacker...!