Congrats & Political Advice for UBL-

SPIKESMYGOD

Member
Mar 12, 2004
175
46
16
Chapel Hill, NC
I just wanted to send you this little message to congratulate you on a stunning victory in Spain. I am sure you will find the new commie gang to be much more hospitable to your cause. Your campaign tactics, while unorthodox, proved to be quite effective; Even the older Mayor Richard Daley would have been envious of your win- Still, UBL, I doubt that even YOU could get dead people to vote & vote often.

Still, you are a brilliant campaigner & should not rest on your camel with just this latest victory, for there is SO much more work to be done.

1) You need to start sending your "campaign workers" to Poland, to start laying the ground work. Better get there before Putin & Russia want to take it back.

2) Next, on to Britain. I am sure that a good "campaign stop" near 11 Downing St. or The Palace would nearly assure a No Confidence vote for Bush's favorite lying, crooked lackey, Tony Blair. If you can't fit that into your schedule, just get them before the next election, building on your splendid victory in Spain.

3) Don't be TOO distracted from your hard work in Iraq. Yeah, I know that al-Zarkawi has been bitching up a storm & being a real drag on the ticket, being so negative about your Iraqi progress, but every campaign has those whiners. If you win in Iraq, there is good reason to hope that you & the Taliban will regain your home base in Afghanistan. Remember, you have to stay focused or else things may get worse & the people of Iraq might actually have a future of peace, prosperity, & security. I mean, bloody HELL! Bush the Butcher has already freed over 35 million people from your clutches, so don't yeild any more ground to him, ok?

Now, for the big one.......

America- November 2nd, 2004:

4) If you can somehow pull off a grand "campaign speech" right near the election, your boy, John F. Kerry is a shoo-in, ousting that really mean, unilateral infidel, President George W. Bush.

btw, Binny- can I call ya Binny? Thanks! I have to ask, Binny....Were you one of the foreign leaders who's rooting for Kerry to beat Bush? Ah, come on, you can tell me! Yeah.....I knew you were. Good call, dude!

Anyway.......

Kerry, unlike Bush, will cease viewing your "political career" as a military issue, but more of one which should be handled by subtle, nuanced diplomacy & the issuing of arrest warrants. He would love to bring us back to the loving arms of France, Russia, Germany, & the U.N.- Ya know, the nations & body which were taking bribes from & sending arms to Saddam?......Good guys! In other words, it will be like 4 more years of your former best co-worker, Bill Clinton. [ Can you actually believe those weasels in Sudan thought that your boy Clinton would except their 1996 offer to turn you over to The Great Satan?.....I think NOT!] .

If Kerry wins- though I have my doubts....sorry- it will be just like the old glory days, once again. Trust me, being that I am an American, I can guarantee that we have, per capita, just as many stupid cowards here as there are in Spain. If you can just pull off another "stump speech," as you did in Spain, you & Al Qaeda will be home free!

Remember, the early homicide bomber bird gets the worm!

Oh, if you wish to personally thank me in for this great political advice, I'll be the one going to the polls in November wearing a bulletproof jacket & bio/chem suit.

Thanks a lot, Spain!
 
That's one of the funniest articles I've ever heard besides

ANOTHER FUNNY QUOTE:
Well, why not settle it once and for all? France vs. the US, at a time and place of France's choosing. Hell, we'll even let you launch a surprise invasion... at which point you will see what the right to bear arms will do to an invading army.

We landed on France's beaches once, we could certainly do it again!
By gop_jeff from the US Message Boards France Topic Message Board
 
Originally posted by SPIKESMYGOD
I just wanted to send you this little message to congratulate you on a stunning victory in Spain. I am sure you will find the new commie gang to be much more hospitable to your cause. Your campaign tactics, while unorthodox, proved to be quite effective; Even the older Mayor Richard Daley would have been envious of your win- Still, UBL, I doubt that even YOU could get dead people to vote & vote often.

Still, you are a brilliant campaigner & should not rest on your camel with just this latest victory, for there is SO much more work to be done.

1) You need to start sending your "campaign workers" to Poland, to start laying the ground work. Better get there before Putin & Russia want to take it back.

2) Next, on to Britain. I am sure that a good "campaign stop" near 11 Downing St. or The Palace would nearly assure a No Confidence vote for Bush's favorite lying, crooked lackey, Tony Blair. If you can't fit that into your schedule, just get them before the next election, building on your splendid victory in Spain.

3) Don't be TOO distracted from your hard work in Iraq. Yeah, I know that al-Zarkawi has been bitching up a storm & being a real drag on the ticket, being so negative about your Iraqi progress, but every campaign has those whiners. If you win in Iraq, there is good reason to hope that you & the Taliban will regain your home base in Afghanistan. Remember, you have to stay focused or else things may get worse & the people of Iraq might actually have a future of peace, prosperity, & security. I mean, bloody HELL! Bush the Butcher has already freed over 35 million people from your clutches, so don't yeild any more ground to him, ok?

Now, for the big one.......

America- November 2nd, 2004:

4) If you can somehow pull off a grand "campaign speech" right near the election, your boy, John F. Kerry is a shoo-in, ousting that really mean, unilateral infidel, President George W. Bush.

btw, Binny- can I call ya Binny? Thanks! I have to ask, Binny....Were you one of the foreign leaders who's rooting for Kerry to beat Bush? Ah, come on, you can tell me! Yeah.....I knew you were. Good call, dude!

Anyway.......

Kerry, unlike Bush, will cease viewing your "political career" as a military issue, but more of one which should be handled by subtle, nuanced diplomacy & the issuing of arrest warrants. He would love to bring us back to the loving arms of France, Russia, Germany, & the U.N.- Ya know, the nations & body which were taking bribes from & sending arms to Saddam?......Good guys! In other words, it will be like 4 more years of your former best co-worker, Bill Clinton. [ Can you actually believe those weasels in Sudan thought that your boy Clinton would except their 1996 offer to turn you over to The Great Satan?.....I think NOT!] .

If Kerry wins- though I have my doubts....sorry- it will be just like the old glory days, once again. Trust me, being that I am an American, I can guarantee that we have, per capita, just as many stupid cowards here as there are in Spain. If you can just pull off another "stump speech," as you did in Spain, you & Al Qaeda will be home free!

Remember, the early homicide bomber bird gets the worm!

Oh, if you wish to personally thank me in for this great political advice, I'll be the one going to the polls in November wearing a bulletproof jacket & bio/chem suit.

Thanks a lot, Spain!

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

OK you're hired, you are now the politcal adviser to UBL and AQ at large, congratualtions, Allah is proud, the 72 virgins could not be arranged though:(
 

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