Child Support is unfair

[JakeStarkey]

Then the system works. Have your attorney file to remove the restriction. Parenting is a two way street, and if the non custodial parent won't cooperate, he or she does not want to parent.

The Only Rule

If a parent is going to pay court-order child support, the parent should have the lawyer convince the judge that the child and custodial parent cannot leave the judicial district for any signficant amount of time or prepare to move elsewhere without the prior approval of the court.

The welfare of the child supercedes the custodial or non-custodial parent's desire to relocate elsewhere. Future marriage has nothing to with the order.

The children remains in the district until the judge says otherwise.

Here you can't move to another school district without the other parents approval. I have no clue where my kid's dad is right now, he hasn't seen my son since last spring and I haven't talked to him in almost two months but I still have to have his approval to move school districts. Of course he doesn't reply to the courts when they notify him, which takes awhile especially if he ignores the notices I can move but that usually takes months.
It took my friend I think four months to get approval from the courts after her kids dad wouldn't respond to be able to move to another town within the same state.

 

[JakeStarkey]

Oh, the irony of this.

You've had it explained to you repeatedly, by a variety of people including at least one attorney. You can't understand it because you are so focused on your desire to control you are completely blinded to reality.

 

[koshergrl]

I think the school is giving you the runaround, Luissa.

A lot of times they CLAIM they can/can't do something with regards to custody and generally they're full of shit.

I had a parent call me once to say the school would not release his son to him, after the kids' custodial parent, the mom, went missing. His son was at school, had a bb gun shot that was infected, and the school was trying to locate the mom to send him home for treatment...and couldn't find her. They called a FRIEND of hers, and told the dad (who tried to pick the child up...there was no restraining order in place) that they couldn't release the child to him without something from the court. But they COULD release the child to a *friend* of the mom's.

I called the school and told them that our client was going to pick up the child, that there were no restrictions on his contact with the child, and if they didn't like it we would send a police officer with him.

Don't assume the school knows what the hell they're talking about when they tell you you *aren't allowed* to do something.

 

[Luddly Neddite]

I believe if child support is in the best interest of the child and if the state wants the father (or mother) to pay, it should be in the form of a card like an EBT to check how the money is being spent. It makes no sense for fathers to cut a woman a check, only to have her do as she wish. I hear to many stories of men payingan arm and a leg yet, the woman is buying Channel gift bags while her child has a dirty shirt and a snotty nose.

Well then, we should also assign a dollar amount worth of such things as sitting up all night with a sick child why the child's father is out partying. How about making sure the child gets "well child" check ups and vaccines on time? Whether you know it or not, she pays much more for clothing, school supplies, food, and all the rest than what dad pays in support. Or, as in the case of our National Dead Beat Dad, Joe Walsh, how about he be forced to pay for the child's health insurance if he refuses to allow the mother to carry the child on hers via ObamaCare?

Edited because I said what I really think and that's not allowed in this forum.

 

[Aristotle]

I can't believe some of you actually think its ok to spend child support money on yourself. How does personal luxury equate ti child support?

Dude...you don't get it. Your child support dollars are a drop in the bucket compared to the actual cost of raising one. Child care while the custodial parent alone can and does bleed single moms(or dads) dry.

I'll tell you what....have her itemize every expenditure on that child for a month...especially August when people are doing the "back to school" thing....and offer to pay half of that every month......believe me....you're getting off cheap.

You're talking as if every woman out here is responsible. Remember majority of the single mothers are young. In addition to that, a lot of these single mothers are getting help from mommy or daddy or grand.mother. Spare me the sob story of what women pay. The system is unfair and I have challenged that and you have not demonstrated otherwise, you can't come through with the answer, typical of a steelers fan.

 

[Aristotle]

You've had it explained to you repeatedly, by a variety of people including at least one attorney. You can't understand it because you are so focused on your desire to control you are completely blinded to reality.

First off whoever said they were a lawyer I missed it because I don't recall anyone declaring themselves a lawyer and if they are, do they practice marital law?

Also, I made it clear that spending money on oneself does not count as child suppprt so far, nobody has countered that.

 

[Steelplate]

I can't believe some of you actually think its ok to spend child support money on yourself. How does personal luxury equate ti child support?

Dude...you don't get it. Your child support dollars are a drop in the bucket compared to the actual cost of raising one. Child care while the custodial parent alone can and does bleed single moms(or dads) dry.

I'll tell you what....have her itemize every expenditure on that child for a month...especially August when people are doing the "back to school" thing....and offer to pay half of that every month......believe me....you're getting off cheap.

You're talking as if every woman out here is responsible. Remember majority of the single mothers are young. In addition to that, a lot of these single mothers are getting help from mommy or daddy or grand.mother. Spare me the sob story of what women pay. The system is unfair and I have challenged that and you have not demonstrated otherwise, you can't come through with the answer, typical of a steelers fan.

typical Steelers fan? What does that mean? You do realize that attacks are not allowed here. What they get from mommy and daddy is NONE of your business.

The system is NOT unfair. You shot the wad....you help pay for your kid...it's real....REAL simple. If you don't like it? well, like I said....masturbation is cheaper(you don't have to take your hand out for dinner and a movie), and there's ZERO chance for putting yourself into a situation you obviously don't want to.have to contend with.

It's also pretty obvious that no matter what ANYONE says, you have your mind made up....you come up with all of these ridiculous scenarios.....nails, beer, crack, $500 handbags, etc.....you remind me of some conservatives who do.the "welfare mom with a Mercedes and a 60" LED TV" thing.....they don't want an honest discussion or even a debate....they just want to feign outrage.

 

[koshergrl]

You've had it explained to you repeatedly, by a variety of people including at least one attorney. You can't understand it because you are so focused on your desire to control you are completely blinded to reality.

First off whoever said they were a lawyer I missed it because I don't recall anyone declaring themselves a lawyer and if they are, do they practice marital law?

Also, I made it clear that spending money on oneself does not count as child suppprt so far, nobody has countered that.

Yes, several people countered it...if what you're saying (it's hard to tell) is that child support shouldn't be spent on oneself.

 

[Steelplate]

BTW.....what exactly do you want? You want the mother to be damn near destitute? Seems to me that way.....

One other thing.....how do you know that those nails that she bought came out of YOUR money?....which really isn't YOUR money, but your kid's money.

The bottom line, once again.....if you don't want this type of thing to happen, don't have sex. You seem very young.....life isn't fair. It's not fair for the single mom or dad forced to raise these kids on their own....to complain about having no other responsibility than a garnishment of your wages as "unfair" is an immature outlook, and the Steelers dig only further illustrates that.

Just the magical thinking involved with the idea that a person's favorite sports team has anything to do with their intelligence or mindset is ludicrous.

BTW, you want to know WHY I'm a Steelers fan? First off, I'm from PA....But beyond that.....The Pittsburgh Steelers represent hard working, blue collar people with integrity. People that honor their responsibilities....not to try to duck from them by dreaming up scenarios to try to prove a non-point.

 

[koshergrl]

He wants to be able to act punitively towards the mother; in other words, to continue to exert control of her. This isn't about the well being of kids. It's about control.

 

[Aristotle]

Dude...you don't get it. Your child support dollars are a drop in the bucket compared to the actual cost of raising one. Child care while the custodial parent alone can and does bleed single moms(or dads) dry.

I'll tell you what....have her itemize every expenditure on that child for a month...especially August when people are doing the "back to school" thing....and offer to pay half of that every month......believe me....you're getting off cheap.

You're talking as if every woman out here is responsible. Remember majority of the single mothers are young. In addition to that, a lot of these single mothers are getting help from mommy or daddy or grand.mother. Spare me the sob story of what women pay. The system is unfair and I have challenged that and you have not demonstrated otherwise, you can't come through with the answer, typical of a steelers fan.

typical Steelers fan? What does that mean? You do realize that attacks are not allowed here. What they get from mommy and daddy is NONE of your business.

The system is NOT unfair. You shot the wad....you help pay for your kid...it's real....REAL simple. If you don't like it? well, like I said....masturbation is cheaper(you don't have to take your hand out for dinner and a movie), and there's ZERO chance for putting yourself into a situation you obviously don't want to.have to contend with.

It's also pretty obvious that no matter what ANYONE says, you have your mind made up....you come up with all of these ridiculous scenarios.....nails, beer, crack, $500 handbags, etc.....you remind me of some conservatives who do.the "welfare mom with a Mercedes and a 60" LED TV" thing.....they don't want an honest discussion or even a debate....they just want to feign outrage.

Are you that uptight you can't take a friendly poke at your team? I was attacking your football team not you personally.

Let me say that your notion of "you get her pregnant its your choice" is a ridiculous cop out to cover the irresponsibility of some women who misuse child support. Any reasonable man understands the risk of unprotected sex but that is not the issue here. The issue here is a flawed system that many women take advantage of. A lot of women use the money on themselves and not for their kid. A lot of men with good paying jobs shell out cash monthly because there are women who are too lazy to get a damn job. Most of you are making it sound like women do all this work. First off statistics show that women younger 18 are parents and are recipients of government assistance. Most reside in the Bible belt, and a lot of them come from low socioeconomic backgrounds so please save the "women do x, y, and z" argument. A lot of these girls have unprotected sex due to risky sexual behavior and no home training.

So no, its not just some guy sticking his dick in a woman. Its two young idiots procreating painting the human gene pool. Its these kind of huma who create kids like "Honey Boo Bo." You're speaking as if these single mothers are 30 year old. Please spare me.

 

[Aristotle]

BTW.....what exactly do you want? You want the mother to be damn near destitute? Seems to me that way.....

One other thing.....how do you know that those nails that she bought came out of YOUR money?....which really isn't YOUR money, but your kid's money.

The bottom line, once again.....if you don't want this type of thing to happen, don't have sex. You seem very young.....life isn't fair. It's not fair for the single mom or dad forced to raise these kids on their own....to complain about having no other responsibility than a garnishment of your wages as "unfair" is an immature outlook, and the Steelers dig only further illustrates that.

Just the magical thinking involved with the idea that a person's favorite sports team has anything to do with their intelligence or mindset is ludicrous.

BTW, you want to know WHY I'm a Steelers fan? First off, I'm from PA....But beyond that.....The Pittsburgh Steelers represent hard working, blue collar people with integrity. People that honor their responsibilities....not to try to duck from them by dreaming up scenarios to try to prove a non-point.

This comment is the reason why I act arrogant. I made it clear in my original post. Go back and re-read it.

 

[jillian]

I am in no way defending the irresponisbility of men who lack the fortitude to take care of their own responsibility as an adult, but I firmly believe any system that awards someone with money ought to be tracked. I'm not sure about you guys but I meet far too many men with no representation regarding child support and the issues they face regarding money. How is it that the state can track EBT payments but not child support? I personally believe the system is unfair towards responsible men and are soft on irresponsible women....What say ye?

would you prefer that she ask permission? money is fungible... what is spent on the house and food and everything else... can come from either pocket.

get over it.

 

[Aristotle]

I am in no way defending the irresponisbility of men who lack the fortitude to take care of their own responsibility as an adult, but I firmly believe any system that awards someone with money ought to be tracked. I'm not sure about you guys but I meet far too many men with no representation regarding child support and the issues they face regarding money. How is it that the state can track EBT payments but not child support? I personally believe the system is unfair towards responsible men and are soft on irresponsible women....What say ye?

would you prefer that she ask permission? money is fungible... what is spent on the house and food and everything else... can come from either pocket.

get over it.

Does anyone read anymore?

 

[Ravi]

Ratti,

Thanks for the violation....

Do the world a favor and kill yourself. We need less racist pricks.

You claim to be black, right? You aren't fooling anyone. You're a stormfront tool.

I've never been on that sight. Heard more about it being a member here. I don't subscribe to racist tenets. Shall I post the racist comment you made in the Racism section?

Be my guest. But first answer the question.

 

[Steelplate]

He wants to be able to act punitively towards the mother; in other words, to continue to exert control of her. This isn't about the well being of kids. It's about control.

Pos Rep for you KG....we don't often agree...but on this? we are of one mind.

I know people who get so jaded from a bad relationship that the kids get used as pawns. When my first wife and I split up, a co-worker was also going through a divorce...we rented a place together and shared expenses. He was very bitter towards his ex.....both of us went through similar marriages.....domineering, controlling wives.....both of whom were....how do I say it kindly? monogamously challenged?

Anyway....both of us were pretty messed up emotionally. But one thing I noticed in myself.....the anxiety was gone.....I was having fun again.....it wasn't real long before I forgave her and wished her nothing but the best....I still feel that way. But my buddy was bitter for a long time.....still is to some extent. The only difference I can think of is this.....my ex and I never had kids....my friend had four with his ex, so he had a lot more pain to deal with.....so I don't judge him....just glad that he let a lot of it go......but he ALWAYS made his payments without complaint and tried to be as involved in his kids' lives as much as possible....That's maturity. That's putting your anger, pain and heartache aside and manning up.

Which is what REAL men do.

 

[jillian]

Aristool, you should do the world a favor and let any woman you sleep with know how much you despise women and personal responsibility.

That way women at least have an idea of what a low life you are. Yeah, I said that in the CDZ. Bite me.

Ratti,

Thanks for the violation....

Do the world a favor and kill yourself. We need less racist pricks.

You claim to be black, right? You aren't fooling anyone. You're a stormfront tool.

absolutely

 

[Aristotle]

My issue with child support stems from the lack of tracking of how monies are spent. There is noguarantee that any deducted money (from levies or established payment systems) actually go to the support of the child. If there is a payment plan, all plans should be tracked. A man who works has every right to know how his money is spent on the child. Like the EBT system the government can track any money that are spent in accordance to state defined support for the child. Not only does that cut down on misuse of monies spent, it declogs our court system.

 

[Annie]

The only unfair thing about child support the one who is paying it can't use it as a tax deduction I pay a thousand a month for one child and can't use it as a deduction

I'm guessing that is because of divorce agreement. Mine gave an 'every other year' claim. One year I got 1 deduction, the next two. Ex got the same.

 

[Aristotle]

You claim to be black, right? You aren't fooling anyone. You're a stormfront tool.

I've never been on that sight. Heard more about it being a member here. I don't subscribe to racist tenets. Shall I post the racist comment you made in the Racism section?

Be my guest. But first answer the question.

Ok what was the question..."You claim to be black right?" I cannot claim a phenotypical trait, I am African-American