Animal Stories

I want a micro piggy like that


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A place to tell public and intimate animal stories :eusa_clap:


i got one

I got an animal story
..i have a rescue dog

I got him off a homeless junkie in a lil shit hole city sitting on the side of a pilot gas station ....i was in the hood trying some street tacos someone told me about .


Not talking about a bullshit I went to the pound rescue cause i saw a commercial .Someone abandoned a toy poodle Kinda sorta. its a long sad story how the degenerate junkie got him but i gave the degenerate junkie 70 dollars for the dog.

He was emaciated , filthy , covered in fleas..had mites so bad his ears were black as night
the dog to ....WOT

He was filthy , the most pathetic lil creature you've ever seen
Like Chelsea Handler pathetic THAT BAD

WHEN i was driving him home he puked on the seat looked up at me ...then began to eat it .
At least it wasn't liquid It was a long solid blob of many colors and I DO NOT KNOW WHAT that is

BIGGEST Mistake EVER !
Taking him home right away but I really had no choice .It took me a month to get rid of the goddamn fleas ......THE HORRAH! and im a guy who used to keep cereal in the fridge so i wouldn't get mice rats or roaches .THE HORRAH THE HORRAH!...the mites were gone in 2 or 3 days....

Took him to the vet 3 times must of spent 500 already ...IT Would of cost me 1500 in NYC.

Neutered shots, medicine ,he had a double tooth they pulled one, and a stay over night all at once ? $275.00
I LOVE DIXIE !!!!!

Shes wonderful! a real old school country vet . we live not to far form one of the best veterinarians colleges in the country ...that what the locals tell me anyway she had that degree on the wall

They got a litlle barn in the back to for larger animals like ponys, hogs,donkeys ,and cows.

SO why did he have to go 3 times? He was stroking out and having seizures ...i forget the name of what hes got.
I got written down.

So As i'm fatten him up a little......... besides dog food i'm feeding him everything i'm eating! (SPARE ME THE LECTURE I KNOW ). This dog has a sweet tooth and a half...the sugar was setting off his seizures ..He'll still get em but rarely now .He was getting them once, twice a week..IT FINALLY HIT ME shit! THE SUGAR IS SETTING HIM OFF.
The night after they fixed him he stroked out in the office ......they gave him oxygen lol
I think i'd stroke out and like some oxygen to if i woke up and my balls were gone.

they're under control , he rarely gets em if they ever get bad she gave me a specialist i can take him to .

When we first weighed him he was barely 4 lbs JUST skin and bones ..hes a chubby lil muscly sausage now...but no apple pie and ice creme ...He'll eat a whole pigs ear in one shot and not puke .The pigs ear is bigger than his head and he wont stop until its gone...Ive eaten BIG THICK ribeyes with him and he can go bite for bite and not puke

Swear to god!

I have him about a lil over year now hes smart as could be .It took me only a couple weeks to get him to stop crappin and pissin in the house. Still working on some serious abandonment issues. IM NOT kidding if im home ...just follows me everywhere..hes right behind me if i get up and go downstairs . Icant even sneak out ...sound asleep or not ...... outside dont even need a leash ..BUT panics if i get out of the car without him .

WHen i come home its a whole frantic 20 minute hello the dog will actually whimper hes so happy to see me.

Someone definitely beat him cause every time id raise my hand really or even just move fast he'd flinch ...not to smack him or anything im not a monster
If ya yell at him he just rolls over on his side

He was starving he'll eat any kind of paper ....krystal boxes with a little cheese stuck to the bottom are very good apparently ... but he'll eat a dirty paper towel with like windex and dirt on it. THAT habbit took a while to break

Like i said hes a pathetic lil soul

The only reason hes not behind me RIGHT NOW last night i went out drinking with mu bud the beer place we go to somebody brought strawberry moonshine ......UH boy SMOOTH

we had dinner he passed out again the DOG is sleeping on his head...his womans pissed that why hes still here . i told him just blame me ....it wasnt my FAULT she wasnt buyin it anyway

...Im stuck with him now the vet thinks hes only 3 years old tops ! and they live 20 years
If i didn't take him that day he probably wouldn't of made it .

He needs a hair cut bad which is a plus the hot women at the grooming place go nuts for him
look JUST like this
xpoodle-on-a-log.jpg.pagespeed.ic.kPh-_Li1ye.jpg

fag dog
except raggier like a mini chewbacca...they especially need thier feet done ...its like chewbaccas arms , their hair is kinda like a sheep

As soon as my place is ready im getting me a balckn tan coon hound pup or two red Doberman ....maybe all three

The only other dog i ever had when i was younger was a rottie i went from a 140 lb big mush to gayest dog ever ..he only looked menacing he'd lick ya to death ...God i loved that dog .He actually saved my ass one night...long story short ...i was going into a warehouse house to get something i forgot

IT was late
I m a big guy but a car pulls up across the street 3 fuckin monsters get out .

What they dont see is the rottie rottwieler in the back of my car .

Theyre coming right towards me ..the dog starts going nuts and the cars bouncing up and down ...im not making this up THAT dog wouldn't bark for nothing...nothing made that dog bark

rotties are not big barkers ...this sounds nuts BUT he knew trouble was coming right at me

they turned around ...THEY TURNED THE FUCK AROUND!
typical me

GUYS can i help you ?whats a matter ? where ya going?
all i heard back was " fuck you " LOL

THE DOG saved me from a brawl or death !!
They were gonna try and strong arm me while they robbed me and the place.....fuck that

He died when he was 9 ....it was an accident to I was heartbroken for days .
A brute to gayest dog ever!

The large poodles are great water dogs and bird fetchers..and they're really not French they are originally a German breed.

Believe me the guys at the range are relentless. They gave me shit all afternoon one day .Even the guy who rides around in his manly pickup with a pair of chihuahuas was givin me shit :auiqs.jpg:
Good thing I dont need a safe space

He didn't even have a name he comes when i snap my fingers and call him pup , pup pup, or fag dog .

Pathetic as he is Hes a happy lil dog now ...hes got more stuffed animals than most 3rd world children ......bones to , mini tennis balls ...... forget it its ridiculous
I pick em all up and put in one big pile and as the days go on they spread out all over the freakin place

I'll put a picture of him up ... do a before and after his haircut? ..hes going this week
Tomorrows Monday im calling making the appointment .

chewie ...thats probably what i should officially name him
cracka will work
White with pink skin like a pinky ya feed to a snake

I suspect hes a white nationalist pfffft lol

2 dog stories for the price of one
I got pictures of Rommel the rottie to
 
fag dof 2.jpg

fag dog.jpg

I told ya hes a pathetic lil ship wreck . i can only imagine what a shitty miserable first couple years he had.

I also call him shit ass
why ?because little hairy dogs sometimes get messy back there .SOMETIMES i gotta throw him in the sink and hose his ass down .
Should i of just ignored the junkie and this poor pathetic retard of a gay dog?
Just stepped over em both?
Probably! .....i didnt think to far ahead AND i should of MADE the junkie give me 20 bucks to take him .....ya think !!! :04:
I did jew em down form a hundred

Before i got home he was probably already high ..GUARANTEED
fuckin junkies

yes thier eyes get dirty ya gotta wipe em down ? i do
im calling today
wash, shave, and some nail grooming.
HEs a total mess
OH GOILS IM going to the beauty parlor

look at those feet chewbacca
that was my blanky
thats his blanky now

i made him his own little bed he loves it

I also used to have a beautiful leather chair THAT I HAD FOR YEARS
it was a lil pricey when i bought it....i bought it in a store where we sneer at broke ass wanna be ivy league suburbanites bigshots.
Its destroyed ! from him stomping on it with his nails .
he stamps his feet in a funny little gay dog kinda way
it my gift to him ...uh boy

i put it next to the fish tank for him hes fascinated by the fish.
When i grab his leash he automatically hops on it so i dont have to bend over and put his leash on ....hes smart as could be and a lucky little bastard that i found him ..

i'm stuck ...ya cant really drop em off at a pound ...they usually get put down .
I could of looked for somebody to take him ...thats what i was gonna do
MY sister " OMG SEND HIM TO ME "
Really ? lol i dont think you know what yer asking for.
poor lil pathetic soul

I told him a coon hound brother or some dobbies with his own fenced in yard n pool with access from a doggie door...its a comin
ya see these new doggie doors ? you put a transmitter on your dogs collar he can come an go
frisky brave raccoons ..NOPE

If worse comes to worse i can always air mail him to Venezuela
JUST add a couple rotten potatoes out of the garbage VIOLA!
DEMOCRATIC SOCIALIST dinner for two is now served .

god loves retards and drunks
He was looking out for this lil retard when i wandered across him
 
Kong.
I bought a black Kong for my black lab in 2002.
He died in 2011, but the Kong didn't.
Meanwhile, I bought a golden retriever, and he enjoyed chewing and playing with the Kong, (he's 10 years old as I write this).
I bought a second black lab in 2016, and I bought a second Kong so each dog could chew.
Unfortunately, this young black lab developed a cancer in his right hip, and we had to have him euthanized before he was two years old.
In 2018, I bought an 8-week-old black lab/border collie cross.
I bought a new black Kong to replace one that had rolled under the deck. Last week she destroyed the new one.
Today I bought another black Kong, which she destroyed in just over an hour.
WTF?
Are these things being made out of papier mache?
They cost over $20 Canadian each.
I'm posting to issue a warning, and to ask for recommendations.
Anyone?
 
Kong.
I bought a black Kong for my black lab in 2002.
He died in 2011, but the Kong didn't.
Meanwhile, I bought a golden retriever, and he enjoyed chewing and playing with the Kong, (he's 10 years old as I write this).
I bought a second black lab in 2016, and I bought a second Kong so each dog could chew.
Unfortunately, this young black lab developed a cancer in his right hip, and we had to have him euthanized before he was two years old.
In 2018, I bought an 8-week-old black lab/border collie cross.
I bought a new black Kong to replace one that had rolled under the deck. Last week she destroyed the new one.
Today I bought another black Kong, which she destroyed in just over an hour.
WTF?
Are these things being made out of papier mache?
They cost over $20 Canadian each.
I'm posting to issue a warning, and to ask for recommendations.
Anyone?

Sad that a dog would get cancer so young. Also sad that Canada never solves the problem of their way overpriced items; or are you doing a good job of not letting China own you like the US? If so, then it might be a good price to pay.
 

my mother has her husbands parrot and mccaw ...BOTH which will also probably out live her. mccaw hes only 20 something hes got a good 30 or 40 years left.
they have shorter life spans . the parrot was adopted and was he old i don't remember how old

im not taking em

my brother loves those birds he'll take em ...they are amazing lil creatures ...the mcaws not so little
when the mccaw doesn't wanna go to bed and back in its cage the parrot loves to tell the mccaw" cmon cmon cmon cmon cmon "




my little gay dog is going in friday
im posting his after shot he'll look like a million bucks
 
I cleaned him up a little cause he got a little shit ass last night

.....hes chewing on his bone before his big day at the beauty parlor
thats where he likes to sit and where i pile up his toys which are spread out in every room of the place ...this sounds totally nuts BUT sometimes after i pile em up he'll nose through looking for a particular one .
I swear to god its like hes looking for the one he wants to play with at that moment .
shit ass.jpg
..hes workin on a bone there

Hes loves when i get down on the floor and knock him around a lil...not to rough im scared im scared im gonna break his lil legs .
people are fucked up how they abandon animals ...i don't even wanna tell ya how the homeless junkie came across him ..some people just suck

Yes i have ugly beige carpet its a rental i dont give a shit .i'm outta here in 6 months or less

here the rottie
PUPPY ROTTIE.jpg
I keep dopey pictures in the kitchen i didnt even have to dig any up . everything boxed up anyway
HEs not even a year old there
HEs still a puppy ...he grew into a mass of solid muscle..one of my first apartment ...I moved outta there cause i was MOVIN on up

Kittehs to
I got a messed up kitty story
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the grey cat was my wifes cat both are gone over a decade now
my wife got sick one year.... way before her time ....im n a very good place these days

the two orange cats are frigging recuse to
Also nota bullshit i'm crying I need to start a conversation and take action cause i saw a tv commercial with feelz....
The mother? my warehouse guys brought her in after the newtown flooded right up to our roll down doors.She was already knocked up she had a litter one of the guys crushed em by accident those were the two survivors .

im laughing now ...shit happens

I took em home cause the human retards probably would of wound up crushing them also.
The mother ran away ..we never saw her again.


after i took that picture couldn't of been more than a month later the skinny one went after a pigeon ....out the window .
i brought the body back up in a garbage bag so his brother could sniff it ...he Actually jumped backwards ...i went down to the east river and buried him ...

Back then their was no hipsters from Minnesota by the water at night .....if you were lucky their was a mobster burying a chopped up corpse

HEY how ya doing tonight ?wot choo buryin bro ?

HE lived for like 12 years .....zero coordination total clutz
whenever i was out of town my tenant neighbor who lived a couple floors down used to take care of my animals .....whichever where still alive
my fish and plants
more dead animals? i was gone she knocked the tops in on a 100 gallon tank by accident and one of the lights popped
electrocuted and poisoned!
total mass extinction ...Today I blame man made global warming

good grief Charlie brown ...SHe didnt know what to do she left it ...i came home to that WTF!!!

I had a killer space and the building brought me a shitload of rent money over the years.
I had a view that ya see in the movies or tv....its ok im replacing the man made mountains with a sweet view of the natural ones
What possessed d me to paint the floors red that year>? i have no idea ........ not a clue
the floors would change colors more than homeless change their underwear

when i first moved in i scraped the ceilings down myself then painted em
took me 80 gallons of white in 5 gallon buckets ....could of been 75 .it was 75 or 80
ANd then i did the perimeter of the whole place UH BOY
i had carpets in the bedrooms and office h thats not the whole space thats just one small section in fron t of where ya walked off the elevator.

had walls built ...moving walls ...20 grand with the interior walls and architectural steel ..cause it looked cool Was functional and BFYTW ....RUSSIAN collusion election I MEAN electrician wired the whole place like a friggin champ !
eventually i threw real hardwood floors down ...
Free Market Capitalism and Opportunity ROCKS! I highly recommend it. And i Highly recommend you preserve it for younger generations


ANyway i'm a magnet for retarded sad sack hard luck animals ...I dont even go out of my way!!! God throws em in my lap....what a prick!.except for rottie hes was from champion lines....Icant even tell ya who sold him to me
cause ya wouldn't believe it anyway

life is a trip to say the least. the scars and losses only make us all around better people .getting a progressive trophy for just showing up , ......not so much
derp
 
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TAH DAHHHH

fag dog derpin.jpg

derp
wot a FAG

gayest dog ever
i told ya the pigs ear bigger than his head OH hes gonna eat it hes just getting started on it there

YEs i also know its precious
Precious-poodle-The-Silence-of-the-Lambs.jpg


IM not calling him precious ....i think the pronoun for that one is SUPER GAY!!!

Im not puffin him out like a fag either ! absolutely not 1 bad enough hes a lil poodle 2 I ALREADY TOOK ENOUGH SHIT :auiqs.jpg:hes happier as a dirty lil greasy rag anyway.he loves the girls they shave him down and clean him up...he sits like a lil soldier ...LOVES IT ....fag.!...
he licks his favorite girl to death ......humm ive also been known to do that
someone brought their lab in and he WAS crying
i went over and gave him a scratch
sad boo boo eyes......please kind sir set me free so i may roll around in horse shit again .

the stuffed animals i get at junk shop s...always popin in anyway lookin for used vinyl or something interesting ...most have walls of children's stuffed animals ...theirs one lil Christan chain i go into .whatever i buy i always drop an extra twenty cause they feed and cloth locals in need...the two legged kind

if ya never did a rescue our are thinkin about it ?
Patience IS A MUST and a lil kindness goes a long way .....yeazir

EVEN if ya wanna go to a pound cause ya saw a commercial and got the feelz ?Be prepared to get stuck ...dont pussy out like an activist child. The last thing an abused or abandoned animal needs is a half assed do gooder quitter to try and return it like a cheap piece of shit ya bought at a suburban target....in for a penny in for a pound....jus sayin
 
Thursday the little dumb ass squirms out of my lap jumping out of the car and he he landed all fucked up
He panics when i open the door ....hes so fucked in the head
hes limping a little ...but then he runs on it ...then limps ...he gets up and stretches he limps

hes mad i didn't come home last night and didnt get home till tonight.
hes a good boy i leave the downstairs bathroom open with puppy we we pads ...i never use the damn thing anyway rarely
he goes
But hes still limping ...its a bad sprain or he broke it

so today its vet time
they're busy all the time but she only charges an extra 25 for emergency visits...i wonder what xrays are gonna run me .it shouldn't be to bad
if he gets a cast i dont know what im gonna do hes a little ball of energy

if he gets a cast ill take a picture .....i don't think it last more than a day or two anyway ...he'll probably eat it .....i think its part billy goat
 
I woke up abruptly one Saturday morning, fighting for air. I opened my mouth, and inhaled hair.....

We had this gigantic orange cat, named descriptively "hairy", who that morning had decided to take a mid-morning nap, directly on my face. How he got there without waking me up, is a good question. But he managed to do it, and nearly suffocate me.

We had another crossed eyed cat years later, that was one of the most goofy animals. Unlike any other animal ever owned, this one could get lost 20 feet from the house. We kept her inside, because once we let her out, she would get lost in the back yard. One time she made it to the front yard, and got lost. It was snowing, and she had made it to the middle of the neighbors front yard, and just sat in the snow meowing. It's not like you can't see our house from where she was, but as soon as we walked up, she got up and walked with us back to the house.

She also had the strangest habit of walking in circles. We had four ground floor rooms. Front room. Dining room, living room, kitchen. They were all connected by door. She would walking around and around, from one room to the next, for hours on ends. We would all be watching TV, and count how many laps she did around the place, while we watched TV.

I miss that cat. She was so funny, and lovable.
 

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