Your Chances of Being Hunted By a Turkey Are Low

[Weatherman2020]

But never zero.

 

[lantern2814]

Why does it figure that this was in Wisconsin? That State hasn’t had great luck lately....

 

[Meister]

One thing I've learned through my years is that you fuck with the turkeys one on one.

 

[toobfreak]

But never zero.
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You too?

 

[White 6]

My grandmother raised domestic turkeys. They can be territorial, downright mean and nasty tempered. Grandad and Grandmother warned me off from them.

Wild Turkey Attacks on the Rise as Populations Flourish

Wild turkey numbers are on the rise and so are attacks by the massive ground-nesting birds. See some examples of their antics.

outsider.com

 

[Road Runner]

But never zero.
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Coming soon to a theater near you,.. "The Revenge Of The Turkey." This time it won't be them served around the Thanksgiving table.

Turkey: Umm,.. excuse me Mr. Postman, did you mail my letter to Santa yet?

 

[Coyote]

But never zero.
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flacaltenn … you better heed this, the Turkey Mafia is no laughing matter!

 

[Hossfly]

 

[flacaltenn]

But never zero.
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My turkeys WORSHIP me. Never had an issue except knocking on the windows when the bird feeders get empty..

 

[toobfreak]

Never ceases to amaze me how people are routinely scared and intimidated by chickens, ducks and turkeys. These are literally meals BEGGING for you to just eat them!

If someone started chasing me with a bag full of Big Macs, I'd say THANK YOU!

Grow a pair America and grab your net!

 

[flacaltenn]

One thing I've learned through my years is that you fuck with the turkeys one on one.

Hope you accidently left out the "dont".. LOL

 

[flacaltenn]

flacaltenn … you better heed this, the Turkey Mafia is no laughing matter!

Already got that covered up in the posts. I always keep a couple patio chairs handy tho -- just in case some stranger turkey mixes in with the flock.

 

[JackOfNoTrades]

One thing I've learned through my years is that you fuck with the turkeys one on one.

Well, sometimes those tables are turned. I remember one year not so long ago I was driving down one of our back country roads and driving up to a flock of them sitting on the opposite side of the road. However, in the exact middle of the road was one big one, just sitting there. So, rather than run over him, I stopped and honked the horn. Whelp, 25 or so of his “breatheren” decided to suddenly get off the side of the road and surround my car. The next thing I know, I hear this hard plunking noise coming from all sides. They were head butting my car. So I lay on the horn, creep and screech the brakes until I get enough daylight to escape that current version of “West Side Story”..except with turkeys.

Still don’t know to this day why they head butted my car.
You mess with one…you might end up getting piled on.

 

[OhPleaseJustQuit]

My turkeys WORSHIP me. Never had an issue except knocking on the windows when the bird feeders get empty..

Turkey Whisperer.

 

[flacaltenn]

Turkey Whisperer.

I am kinda. They make this really cute cooing noise when they eat with other turkeys. I've got that down. Not southern enough to do all the all other calls -- YET..

For all I know, that noise means "get out of my way"..

 

[OhPleaseJustQuit]

I am kinda. They make this really cute cooing noise when they eat with other turkeys. I've got that down. Not southern enough to do all the all other calls -- YET..

For all I know, that noise means "get out of my way"..

I can kinda do the way chickens talk in the morning. Had a neighbor with hens and I loved sitting on my deck with my coffee, being serenaded.

 

[Weatherman2020]

And guess what’s in my woods of all days. Hunters.

 

[Road Runner]

My turkeys WORSHIP me. Never had an issue except knocking on the windows when the bird feeders get empty..

Are you sure that it was worship or them pleading to you not to eat them.

 

[Moonglow]

I never had any problems with my turkeys it was painful when they wanted to sit in yer lap.