I wish I could post more like tinydancer did and less like..me. She had the grace and tact.
TinyDancer was loyal to the principles of freedom. And she had the great courage of her convictions. I agree seeing her posts was an awesome experience. But don't sell yourself short, Marion. Men can show grace and tact. Think of viewing the real world in terms of mathematics. I was married for 44 years to an electrical engineer, and they are known for being the most mathematically-minded logicians in the entire field of engineering. One quirk of him and his pals in the Engineering Society of America was that in problem-solving their approach to getting things right was with slide-rule calculations that are now performed more quickly on hand-held calculators. Oh, the quirk--my husband never lost arguments with me, and I have language acuity. He taught me that math beats language in being right every time. Logic wins over art when it comes to saving people, conserving energy, everything. Engineers must be trained to rely only on planning based on the numbers. He knew he was right when he entered an argument. And he won his arguments with the same grace and tact as the best of good debaters. Only he had one other advantage. Due to his uncanny ability to calculate, he made it his life's mission to make sure he calculated jokes keen enough to make people laugh. That way, his always being the winner, he averted people's anger by preceding the whole debate with a few good shoulder-shaking laughs. That way, the onus was off the genius and on the good heartedness people have when their funny bone has been touched.
It took me years to figure out why smart me couldn't hold a candle to his pleasantly-delivered arguments. He already knew what was the right thing, and it's hard to feel like a loser when you're laughing at yourself. Just sayin'. The man made my life a Heaven on this earth for 44 years. At his funeral, our minister decided to read my essay on the good things he did with his life word for word. I wanted my children to know what a winner he was to make his talents deliver his skills that proved life-saving kudos in an industry that had a high incidence of death and disability due to working with high-voltage cables daily. There were no deaths and no lost-time accidents in his 25 years as manager of electric lines in 3 of his company's 7 state regions in which every man who worked high lines had astute weekly safety education classes and exercising safety, miss meeting, desk duty for 1 week. A thousand people showed up to his retirement party. His ashes reside in a prayer garden of a church he served actively every year of his blessed life. I visit there often just to touch the marble slab that covers his blessed remains and the joy his being lit up any room he entered.