Let me make it simple for you.
in luke 19:27 in a parable Jesus says, "Now, as for those enemies of mine who did not want me to be their king, bring them here and slaughter them in my presence!". Some people could take that to mean that Jesus is instructing the faithful to slaughter Jews and you would prance along and say, murderous bastard! but thats just dumb.
You're beating a dead horse with the metaphors thing because you're very bad at reading comprehension.
Jews, for example, have been circumcising in actuality, not metaphorically but actually cutting the heads of their dicks off ...to PRACTICE the representation of a metaphor. It's not that the metaphor is hard to understand or that the teaching represents a metaphor....it's actually doing it that makes it just as woo-woo as the christ cracker. You are no better, pee-pee cutter. You believe in ridiculous bullshit like a god dictated 613 ridiculous laws to each represent a metaphorical teaching and hand-wash the fact that 1: the god is not in evidence to begin with, woo-woo believer, and 2: chattel slavery, stoning, rape and genocide didn't merely happen metaphorically - same as pee-pee cutting.
You hand wash some things as not actual, when others literally are - yet you mock the metaphorical practice of eating a cracker.
You are a hypocrite, and believe in fairy tales all the same.