Raising Kids & Structure (Discipline)

[Bonzi]

Do you think there is growing trend toward children having less structure and rules in their lives?

If so, do you think (overall) it is a positive or a negative?

I believe without rules/limits, this causes confusion and insecurity in children, and increases stress in their lives.
I think this is a big reason you are seeing more commonplace violence in young children.

Thoughts?

 

[Disir]

Children mimic adults. That means that when you act like a jack ass such as this:
Question for BUTCH Gay Women US Message Board - Political Discussion Forum

or passive aggressive such as this:
Snore Button US Message Board - Political Discussion Forum



then you are signaling that this is appropriate behavior. That extends to physical aggression.

 

[Bonzi]

Children mimic adults. That means that when you act like a jack ass such as this:
Question for BUTCH Gay Women US Message Board - Political Discussion Forum

or passive aggressive such as this:
Snore Button US Message Board - Political Discussion Forum



then you are signaling that this is appropriate behavior. That extends to physical aggression.

Dang. Now you went and hurt my feelings ....

I think the 1st question is legitimate. I do want to understand why a lesbian would want their woman to look "mannish" - it makes no sense!!!

The other is not passive-aggressive. It's funny, and people do prattle on too much.
It's BORING! No one CARES!

 

[Disir]

Children mimic adults. That means that when you act like a jack ass such as this:
Question for BUTCH Gay Women US Message Board - Political Discussion Forum

or passive aggressive such as this:
Snore Button US Message Board - Political Discussion Forum



then you are signaling that this is appropriate behavior. That extends to physical aggression.

Dang. Now you went and hurt my feelings ....

I think the 1st question is legitimate. I do want to understand why a lesbian would want their woman to look "mannish" - it makes no sense!!!

The other is not passive-aggressive. It's funny, and people do prattle on too much.
It's BORING! No one CARES!

It's absolutely passive aggressive.

 

[Bonzi]

Children mimic adults. That means that when you act like a jack ass such as this:
Question for BUTCH Gay Women US Message Board - Political Discussion Forum

or passive aggressive such as this:
Snore Button US Message Board - Political Discussion Forum



then you are signaling that this is appropriate behavior. That extends to physical aggression.

Dang. Now you went and hurt my feelings ....

I think the 1st question is legitimate. I do want to understand why a lesbian would want their woman to look "mannish" - it makes no sense!!!

The other is not passive-aggressive. It's funny, and people do prattle on too much.
It's BORING! No one CARES!

It's absolutely passive aggressive.

Well if it's aggressive at all, it's pretty actively aggressive (for a message board)
I'm pretty passionate about the unnecessary long-windedness of others.
Points can be made with brevity. It's a lost art.
Kind of a "know it all" aren't you?

 

[HereWeGoAgain]

Kids need an ass whipping on occasion.
I think thats pretty clear considering how kids behave now that you cant give em one.

 

[Disir]

Children mimic adults. That means that when you act like a jack ass such as this:
Question for BUTCH Gay Women US Message Board - Political Discussion Forum

or passive aggressive such as this:
Snore Button US Message Board - Political Discussion Forum



then you are signaling that this is appropriate behavior. That extends to physical aggression.

Dang. Now you went and hurt my feelings ....

I think the 1st question is legitimate. I do want to understand why a lesbian would want their woman to look "mannish" - it makes no sense!!!

The other is not passive-aggressive. It's funny, and people do prattle on too much.
It's BORING! No one CARES!

It's absolutely passive aggressive.

Well if it's aggressive at all, it's pretty actively aggressive (for a message board)
I'm pretty passionate about the unnecessary long-windedness of others.
Points can be made with brevity. It's a lost art.
Kind of a "know it all" aren't you?

And you're a passive aggressive sock.

 

[Bonzi]

People like and need rules. It makes them feel safe and secure.

Even if it's restricting, they know there is a set of "do's and dont's" and that someone out there loves them enough to hold them to it.

It's not loving to enable people. Really it's not.....

 

[Bonzi]

Kids need an ass whipping on occasion.
I think thats pretty clear considering how kids behave now that you cant give em one.

It's not just spanking...

It's giving them all they want so they can "keep up with the Jones"
Never wanting them to experience anything that may hurt their feelings because of their "fragile egos".
Saying do and be whatever you want, no rules.

It's not healthy and doesn't make people happy. There has to be discipline, structure and order.

 

[Bonzi]

Children mimic adults. That means that when you act like a jack ass such as this:
Question for BUTCH Gay Women US Message Board - Political Discussion Forum

or passive aggressive such as this:
Snore Button US Message Board - Political Discussion Forum



then you are signaling that this is appropriate behavior. That extends to physical aggression.

Dang. Now you went and hurt my feelings ....

I think the 1st question is legitimate. I do want to understand why a lesbian would want their woman to look "mannish" - it makes no sense!!!

The other is not passive-aggressive. It's funny, and people do prattle on too much.
It's BORING! No one CARES!

It's absolutely passive aggressive.

Well if it's aggressive at all, it's pretty actively aggressive (for a message board)
I'm pretty passionate about the unnecessary long-windedness of others.
Points can be made with brevity. It's a lost art.
Kind of a "know it all" aren't you?

And you're a passive aggressive sock.

Nope you're not a know it all because you have already been wrong on 2 counts.

Careful... admins on here can prove I only have 1 account and you just made an incorrect accusation....

WEIRD!

 

[HereWeGoAgain]

Kids need an ass whipping on occasion.
I think thats pretty clear considering how kids behave now that you cant give em one.

It's not just spanking...

It's giving them all they want so they can "keep up with the Jones"
Never wanting them to experience anything that may hurt their feelings because of their "fragile egos".
Saying do and be whatever you want, no rules.

It's not healthy and doesn't make people happy. There has to be discipline, structure and order.

Oh no doubt. They're taught from early on that they're special.

 

[Disir]

Children mimic adults. That means that when you act like a jack ass such as this:
Question for BUTCH Gay Women US Message Board - Political Discussion Forum

or passive aggressive such as this:
Snore Button US Message Board - Political Discussion Forum



then you are signaling that this is appropriate behavior. That extends to physical aggression.

Dang. Now you went and hurt my feelings ....

I think the 1st question is legitimate. I do want to understand why a lesbian would want their woman to look "mannish" - it makes no sense!!!

The other is not passive-aggressive. It's funny, and people do prattle on too much.
It's BORING! No one CARES!

It's absolutely passive aggressive.

Well if it's aggressive at all, it's pretty actively aggressive (for a message board)
I'm pretty passionate about the unnecessary long-windedness of others.
Points can be made with brevity. It's a lost art.
Kind of a "know it all" aren't you?

And you're a passive aggressive sock.

Nope you're not a know it all because you have already been wrong on 2 counts.

Careful... admins on here can prove I only have 1 account and you just made an incorrect accusation....

WEIRD!

Good luck with that.

 

[Delta4Embassy]

Do you think there is growing trend toward children having less structure and rules in their lives?

If so, do you think (overall) it is a positive or a negative?

I believe without rules/limits, this causes confusion and insecurity in children, and increases stress in their lives.
I think this is a big reason you are seeing more commonplace violence in young children.

Thoughts?

See violence more in young children, I think, because we're a violent warlike culture and society. From a very early age, children view violence as a means to solving problems in tv programs. This is reinforced at home when parents raise their voice. Innocuous to us, but to a child it sends the message than an escalation of force including threats is how to correct undesireable behaviour.

Don't do that. ...DON'T DO THAT! ...What'd I tell you?! SMACK!

That sends the message into a child's subconscious that if they don't get their way right off, escalate the request into a demand. If that doesn't work, apply violence.

When they're older and supposedly mature adults it repeats in adult ways. "I don't agree with you. Since I can't convince you to agree with me I'll raise my voice. If you still don't agree I may have to start shoving you or hitting you."

Repeats at every level especially in government with wars. "We don't agree with you guys over there so here comes the Marines!"

 

[Bonzi]

There may have been more bullying.
Now there is more rage and extreme violence. Because kids feel there are not rules to hold them back.
They are taught that they are always a winner, you always succeed, and at the first sign of rejection, they snap.
Shoot up a school.

 

[hipeter924]

I had tin-pot dictators as parents, who smacked me hard and never showed me any real affection like normal parents.

As a result I have an active disdain and distrust for authority figures, including my immediate family - who would make a good case study of how discipline messes up kids.

So the notion that discipline 'works' was a load of BS. It made me upset, afraid, and I could never view my immediate family that positively as my mind even today associates them with violence.

I will never tell my immediate family though, as they don't give a shit, and only view their crappy parenting through rose tinted glasses.

Once I just disagreed over their long-dead political idol, who was an authoritarian drunken thug (who bullied and harassed his fellow politicians). My father raised his fists, and made clear that if I said more he would hit me.

So if I have kids, I am going to love them, and not make them fear me. Violence will never be in my parenting book, as I can discipline kids without smacking or fists.

 

[Bonzi]

I had tin-pot dictators as parents, who smacked me hard and never showed me any real affection like normal parents.

As a result I have an active disdain and distrust for authority figures, including my immediate family - who would make a good case study of how discipline messes up kids.

So the notion that discipline 'works' was a load of BS. It made me upset, afraid, and I could never view my immediate family that positively as my mind even today associates them with violence.

I will never tell my immediate family though, as they don't give a shit, and only view their crappy parenting through rose tinted glasses.

Once I just disagreed over their long-dead political idol, who was an authoritarian drunken thug (who bullied and harassed his fellow politicians). My father raised his fists, and made clear that if I said more he would hit me.

So if I have kids, I am going to love them, and not make them fear me. Violence will never be in my parenting book, as I can discipline kids without smacking or fists.

Loving discipline is important. I'm talking more about setting hard rules and boundaries.
Not smacking kids around and being unloving.

You can love your kids, and deny them cell phones and unlimited internet and games.

I found that restriction works much better than putting your hands on kids anyway. Take away what they love most (for a period of time) if they misbehave.

Parents make mistakes when they let the kids influence all the decisions and give them whatever they want because they are worried their kids will "suffer" for not having what all the other kids have.

 

[Bonzi]