Man dies of boredom at work

[Bootneck]

A 32 year old male office worker died today after overdosing on Excel spreadsheets. The dead man’s boss had earlier warned his employee ‘I tried to stop him, I really did. He started off small, inserting columns and deleting rows. But then he learnt how to do sums and eventually the power of pie charts took over.’

The victim gradually lost the will to live after a freak accident. A whole morning’s work was lost after he deleted the wrong Excel file. A colleague explained “His face just dropped, the thought of sitting in front of a spreadsheet for another minute was just too much, boredom just took him away.’

Rumours that well wishers should email their condolence’s in the form of a pivot table have been denied by the family.

 

[William Joyce]

My condolences. I used to be an insurance defense attorney, so I know how that goes!

 

[REVxERIK]

A 32 year old male office worker died today after overdosing on Excel spreadsheets. The dead man’s boss had earlier warned his employee ‘I tried to stop him, I really did. He started off small, inserting columns and deleting rows. But then he learnt how to do sums and eventually the power of pie charts took over.’

The victim gradually lost the will to live after a freak accident. A whole morning’s work was lost after he deleted the wrong Excel file. A colleague explained “His face just dropped, the thought of sitting in front of a spreadsheet for another minute was just too much, boredom just took him away.’

Rumours that well wishers should email their condolence’s in the form of a pivot table have been denied by the family.

lol! but if it's true many condolences for his family.

 

[JW Frogen]

Poor bastard.

I work in a government building, so I see this all the time, they die from furious strokes of e-mails not sent or water cooler gossip that hit too hard.

It is a paper cut jungle.

Fortunately I work in security, so I actually get to use real violence rather than the faux stuff.

It keeps me young, that and the fact I can drink at work.

 

[JW Frogen]

That and the stairwell sex.

Some women just can not resist a violent man in a security uniform who can recite the Divine Comedy.